I let my cat out to wander last night at about 3 AM. We found her early this morning under the porch, frightened. Her hindquarters were not functioning. The entire back of her body felt cold.
I rushed her to the vet, who suspected heart problems were the cause, and he in turn referred us to a nearby specialty animal hospital. I brought her there straightaway, and after running her through a variety of tests including an echocardiogram, she was diagnosed as having developed a thromboembolic disease as a result of hypertrophic cardiomyopathy. In english, she had blockage in her heart, some of which had broken off and deadened her from the waist down. She was checked in to the hospital, placed in an oxygen cage, and they were going to work to revive her hindquarters and maybe–maybe–reduce or eliminate the blockage in her heart.
She passed away four hours later.
I can’t tell you the number of times she would curl up in my lap while I was writing. She was my constant companion in my office.
I will miss her terribly.
PAD
• 
That’s awful, Peter. My condolences.
I am truly saddened by your loss PAD. I currently have 3 cats and 3 dogs, and have had cats my entire life. It’s never an easy thing to get by.
It’s this sort of thing that we stopped letting any of our cats be outdoor cats years ago, as I read I thought for sure it was going to turn out to be a bunch of kids with b-b guns or anti-freeze…doesn’t make it any easier though…
I lost my first dog, Clancy, and was devastated. We had brought him to the vet the day before and he called to tell us he thoughtit would be best to put him to sleep. Clancy died as we were on our way to the vet clinic. I still miss him 8 years later. I have 2 dogs now, one who is 17 and the other 9. Many don’t understand the grief caused by the passing of a loved pet. I do. My sincere condolences. The pain passes, but not the wonderful memories.
I love cats myself and have 2 of them for 11 years now. So I really feel with you, dear PAD. My condolences as well.
Bleah, that bites. Hypertrophic Cardiomyopathy is a genetic disease, BTW (a few in my family tree have it), and it rarely shows symptoms until it shows BIG symptoms.
My deepest sympathies, PAD. It’s never easy. I know the kids must be taking it hard as well.
After having acquired a fourth cat this week due to an inability to leave yet another abused stray on its own (and unable to find an appropriate owner), I certainly sympathize. I’ve yet to write a paper without a cat on my lap, begging for attention, one on my research, blocking my reading, and/or one on my keyboard (usually on one hand or another), keeping sure I make deadline.
My condolences.
PAD,
My sincere condolences. Not that that really helps any.
I woke up Saturday morning and found that our cat had died during the night. I remained strong for my wife and three girls, but last night, after the girls went to bed, I just started crying like a baby. I know what you are going through, and hopefully our cats are together somewhere having fun.
Houston
I cried so hysterically when my previous cat passed away, that my vet thought I was a nut. I don’t think it will get any easier when the inevitable happens with the one I have right now. You grow to love them so much, but we will almost always outlive them. It’s devastating.
My condolences on your loss, Peter. Our cat was diagnosed last year with diabetes and while everyone told us to put him down, we got him worked on at extreme financial cost and eventually he came around. He gets insulin injections twice a day and eats special food as well as has to be kennelled at a vet (not a cat kennel) when we travel, but its been worth the extra cost to have him around. I totally understand your taking all measures to save Pandora and wish you and your family the best.
My condolences, Peter. I know that it doesn’t make it any easier, but know that there are people who have gone through similar things before, and as all of us pet lovers can attest, the loss of our animals is nearly as bad as the loss of a family member. All we can do is mourn their passing and remember the good times we had with them. So my heartfelt sympathies for you and your family; I particularly pray that it will not be hard on Caroline.
Chris
Oh, no — how horrible. I understand you taking all possible measures, too — we’ve never had to go that far, but I’m betting we would given the situation.
The three cats in this house (and the three humans) all send along their deepest sympathies.
I’m with you, Chris — I’m hoping Caroline is just young enough that this won’t hit her as hard as it’ll hit those better able to understand what’s going on and better able to cope.
Sympathies again.
TWL
Sorry to hear about your loss.
*HUGS*
Sorry about the loss.
So sorry to hear that. We lost one last year, right after my daughter was born. It’s still hard on my wife, especially, who had the cat for 14 years.
My condolences to you and your entire family.
Peter, we seem to be having similar experiences of late.
Two Mondays ago, my 12-year old cat, Elsa, was badly limping on her right hind leg. I hoped it was something minor that would go away, but after more than a week, I couldn’t wait any more, so I took her to the vet last Friday. She resisted going into the pet carrier (MAN she’s strong for a cat), and howled in distress all the way there. After an X-Ray, he said she tore a ligament, and would have to operate the following morning. I picked her up Saturday afternoon. The total cost: $960. I expressed distress at the amount, and he brought it down to $850, but now buying a new I-Mac, following the meltdown of my current one back in March, is gonna kill me. (The surgery alone was $700). I have to give her antibiotics with an eye dropper twice daily, and she’ll get the staples out of her leg in two weeks, but the worst part was seeing her condition when she got home.
She appeared to be in great pain even when lying on her good leg, and would scratch and claw at the carpet, dragging herself around, as if trying to find a painless position. She wandered around the house, and when she plopped herself down on the edge of the stairs, I tried to move her, making sure not to go anywhere near her bad leg, but she screamed in pain, and dug her teeth into my hand, which she had NEVER done, being the docile animal she is. I frantically called the vet, who assured me she would “adjust” in a few hours, and sure enough, she was walking around, still limping, but she still vocalizes when getting up from a reclined position, even when on her good leg.
She continues to move comparitively seldom, and prefers to lie in a secluded corner of my room, which I know is something cats do when they feel vulnerable (about to give birth, dying, injured, etc.). Today I found her lying in the litter box, and then later, when my mom got home, she was downstairs, where she’s normally not allowed, under the dining room table.
It’s hëll seeing her like this, and I hope that she’ll be okay in two weeks. Although she’s mostly an indoor cat, she climbs up and down the tree outside my window to get in and out of the house during warm weather, but the vet, suspecting that that’s what caused the injury, recommended making her a permanently indoor cat. I know cats live on the high end about 15-17 years, but having to have Elsa’s mother Spot euthanized twelve years ago when some anonymous neighbor shot her with a pellet gun was devastating enough, so I’m hoping for the best.
One of my coworkers yesterday, without any tact, expressed surprise that I simply didn’t euthanize her. What a jerk.
I’m very sorry for Pandora, and hope that you and yours get through this difficult time.
My deepest sympathies, PAD.
My condolences to the entire David family. I know what it’s like to be there, not that my knowing that or saying that will likely help any. You’ve all got my best thoughts anyway.
I’m so sorry to hear about your cat. I lost my pet rabbit this Sunday, myself, and it’s always heartbreaking to have to let them go. Good thoughts and much compassion is heading your way.
Jeri
Deepest sympathy on the loss of your kitty companion.
We’ve got four of the furry ones in this household, and I wish I could send their kitty hugs your way, to help you with the pain you must be feeling.
Khendon.
Years ago my first wife Susan and i had a small, grouchy cat (a feral kitten who i brought home for observation after she bit me and drew blood, who stayed with us after we were sure she wasn’t rabid because she had bonded with Susan).
Bitty Squeek was a beautiful calico — a friend who was involved with cat shows brought round a judging manual; the section on judging calicos was illustrated with phtos that might have been Bitty.
One day we noticed that she was off her food and looking a little less than her glossy-furred usual self. Susan took her to the vet, got her some pills, and we figured all would be well.
It wasn’t.
She kept getting weaker and eating less and less, till she looked like a matted catskin draped over a wire frame. She barely moved. We were force-feeding her with a turkey baster. (And the fact that we could easily get it in her mouth showed just how weak she was; normally it was a fifteen-minute struggle to get one small pill down her.)
Finally the vet diagnosed liver failure from some unknown cause. We had three choices, one of which was to mercifully help her along (i refuse to say “put to sleep” — it lets people who want an easy out off too easily), or we could arrange one of two ways to have a feeding tube (semi)-permanently inserted; either through her side or (with new low viscosity, high energy liquid foods) a much smaller one running in through her nose. This would let us keep her going for a while, either until she died of other causes or her liver recovered.
Gallows humour seems to be a natural thing after a certain amount of stress and worry and grief, and i described the sitation in an APA mailing comment as “Get up, shower, dress, inflate the cat, go to work”.
However, seemingly as soon as she heard that, the cat, not being anxious for such indignity, began getting better, recovered fully, and lived another twelve grouchy years, cheerfully bullying all the other cats in our households.
A few years ago on the rec.arts.sf-fandom newsgroup, someone was talking about a long-time pet who had died, and i said “They give us so much, and they ask so little in return — only a part of your soul.”
PAD-
My thoughts and prayers are with you. They sure tend to worm their way into your heart. I miss Bandit everyday, but was glad to have know him.
As a cat owner and a fan, I offer my sincere condolances. It’s always hard to lose one of the furry family members. I still cry over my calico, and she passed away three years ago.
May she live on forever in your heart and memories. In that sense, she has gained immortality.
1My best wishes to you and your family on the lose of a dear member of your family.
I’m sorry for the loss of your friend.
Fred
My deepest sympathies to you and your family, Peter. I have an elder cat who is experiencing sever urinary problems. I only hope the vet can find a medical treatment. My biggest fear is that it’s a behavioral or senility-type problem and I’ll be forced to put her down.
She is my bedtime spoon cat and sleeping without her has been very difficult these past few weeks.
It’s nice to know that there are so many PAD fans out there who can sympathize with this situation.
Best,
Daniel
I lost my childhood dog, Zinger, seven years ago, and it still hurts sometimes to think of how weak he was the last time I saw him. But he was a good friend, and remembering that helps.
I’m sorry about your kitty, Peter.
You have my deepest sympathies Peter. Pets are truly part of the family and losing one hurts just as much as a human member. It will hurt for quite a while, based on my own personal experience. Me and my wife lost a cat named Butterscotch last year due to feline leukemia and it hurt for a long time, especially for my wife who never had a pet until we adopted Butterscotch.
We had 2 other cats at the time and we got them checked for the disease after 5 months after Butterscotch’s passing and we were lucky that they hadn’t contracted the disease. Since then, we picked up another feline and they are all dear to us.
My wife is a member of cat forum and they gave her a poem about the Rainbow Bridge where pets go once they leave this earth. They go to a place where they play in green fields and never have to worry about food or pain. That comforted us and helped us in our time of need.
My wife and I will keep you and your family in our thoughts.
There isn’t anything much I can say beyond offering my condolences to you for your loss. Having lost a beloved cat unexpectedly as well, I sympathize with how much you will miss her.
I am so sorry.
So sorry to hear about your cat, Peter. I love mine terribly and can’t imagine not having him here. They should all live forever.
My condolences to you and your family. (As I sit here hugging Bobo as he is wondering why he is being smushed.)
Oh, man.
That is terrible. My condolences.
Oh Peter, please accept our deepest sympathies. She was a lovely cat.
I lost my own best friend (Motown) a few years back. He was my constant companion when I did any work on the computer, and things have just not been the same since.
So, you have my deepest condolences, PAD. Sorry for your loss.
Awww man. Well that just sucks it had to happen that way…. My condolences are with you and yours.
Sorry for your loss Peter.
I love pets and I feel your pain.
Regards:
Warren S. Jones III
Very, very sorry, Peter.
Peter,
We lost our first cat, Lid Lid (don’t ask), after a similar situation at the end of last summer. I was absolutely devastated. I hadn’t realized that I had that much love inside me in total, much less for a single cat. (That’s not to minimize what Lid Lid meant to me–I just hadn’t realized how much I cared about him until he was gone.)
My sympathies. I am very, very sorry for your loss.
Eric
Peter,
Not a thing to say that others haven’t said. Crying a bit now at the thought of not hearing the meows as I come up the stairs to my apartment. Stupid that a five pound ball of fluff should do that to a grown man, but here I sit. Will be a wreck when that day comes I’m sure. May you find another friend to help you by stepping on the keyboard as you type. Mine does that all the time, and as such I’ve learned to save often.
Be well, Peter, and know that your gifts of great stories to us month after month do mean something in terms of a bond. I wouldn’t feel this kind of empathy if Byrne’s cat died. (sorry, had to lighten it up a bit) Anyway, prayers are with you, brother.
Sean
Peter, my condolences on losing a loved one.
–Adam
My deepest sympathies. It’s never easy when a family member leaves us before we’re ready to say goodbye.
-Daniel Combs (aka Rex Hondo)-
Dear Peter,
Rather than relate a pet story (the others have done so, much more eloquently than I could), I will dare to address your feelings, as I feel the experience is somewhat universal:
How dare the sun com up; my friend is gone.
How dare young lovers smile; my friend is gone.
How dare anyone care about the international news; my friend is gone.
How dare people at work be concerned with money; my friend is gone.
How dare anything normal go on, on this planet today; my friend is gone.
My brother, I understand.
Love,
Tom
I Know it doesn’t mean much coming from a stranger, but you have my sympothies it’s always hard losing a member of the family….no matter if it’s two legs or four.
Peter, I’m so sorry for you, your family, and Pandora. A good cat is rarer and more valuable than diamonds. If anything, I’m at least glad you got to know such a wonderful friend during her time on this planet.
‘When I play with my cat, who knows whether she is not amusing herself with me more than I with her.’ Montaigne, Essays
Sorry for your loss.
We lost our Fluffy to encephalitis last August before she was even a year old.
My condolences on your family’s Loss.
-Dee/Cee
I’m sorry to hear about your loss. My condolences.
Signed,
a lifetime fan of your work.
From one cat lover to another, PAD, my deepest condolences. The following I recreate from http://www.rainbowsbridge.com:
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.
When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.
All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.
They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.
You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.
Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together….
Author unknown…
I’m sorry for your loss. Another friend just told me her cat was dying of cancer and probably wouldn’t last the night. I will hug my cat extra long for the two of you tonight.