Day: December 30, 2003

Before Captain Hook was maimed by the croc, was he called Captain Hand?

PAD

Okay, it wasn’t exactly ick, but the new version of “Peter Pan” (which the now fairly healthy Ariel and myself went to see this afternoon) just somehow didn’t engage me as much as it should have.

I’d have to attribute it largely to the casting. Jason Isaacs as Hook had the singular misfortune to follow the recent cinematic piracy of Johnny Depp and Geoffry Rush, and pales in comparison. Peter Pan himself is inexplicably the only American and is certainly handsome enough to look at but just doesn’t capture Pan’s arrogance. The only truly magical presence in the film is the mercurial Tinkerbell, who infuses every frame she’s in with boundless energy that no one else approaches (which is ironic considering presumably she shot all her scenes by herself against a green screen.)

Nor am I ecstatic over the subtext of budding maturity being brought so completely over the top. While in the book literally no one touches Peter (which can be interpreted so many ways that it’s a thesis-writer’s dream), in the film the sexually awakening Wendy lays a timely kiss on Pan that sends the entirety of Neverland into orgasmic spasms.

There’s moments. There’s tons of moments. Some great visuals. But somehow it just didn’t make me stand up and crow.

PAD