My first and last word on Paris Hilton

Posted By: Peter DavidPosted On:

Instead of putting her in jail or under house arrest, they should make it so that anytime she wants to drive someplace, she has to carpool with Robert Blake and O.J. Simpson.

PAD

63 comments on “My first and last word on Paris Hilton”

  2. Someone ought to propose in Congress this crazy idea that we should all have equal protection under the law.

  3. I think as punishment for all this stupidity, the judge should put her in with the general population of the prison and just say to her: girl, now you are going to find out what a real mental problem is. And while he is at it, put the idiot sheriff in there too.

  5. Hamish Grant is right, this girl isn’t worthy of our attention. Yes, girl. Whatever her biological age, I don’t think she has the emotional maturity to be considered a woman.

    And I, for one, am sick of this phenomenon in which people are famous just for being famous. Maybe it’s always been true, even before the advent of mass media, but it doesn’t mean I have to like it. As a consequence I pay very little attention to these “celebrities”, as I consider them inconsequential.

    Actor, comedians, musicians, etc. are (or should be) famous because they perform their work for the public, and often do so in the public eye. Whether you agree with the quality of their work, their personal conduct, their political beliefs, etc., at least they’re contributing something to our culture. What have these “famous for being famous” celebrities contributed?

    Of course there is that catch-22 that celebrities face if they become involved in anything that “gives back to the community” (whether on a local or global scale): Are they sincerely interested or jumping on a “trendy” bandwagon? I guess the answer lies in these questions: did they focus on such issues before they became famous; and will they continue to do so even after the spotlight has moved on?

    But whether involved in an issue because they believe in it, or because they’re following a “trend”, at least these “celebrities” contribute something to the community above and beyond providing whatever entertainment they offer. What have these “famous for being famous” people contributed- on any level?

    Besides fodder for late night talk show hosts, that is?

    Rick

    P.S. I’m not suggesting that celebrites should have an obligation to “give back to the community” in some high profile way. Those who focus on raising their kids, attending parent-teacher conferences, coaching Little League, and things of that nature are already giving back. But again, that’s more than I can say for the “famous for being famous” ilk.

  6. From metadish.com:

    “So apparently the judge in the Paris Hilton case is pretty pìššëd øff that Paris’ personal Sheriff, Lee Baca, let her out of jail early. Especially since in his original ruling the judge specifically said, “she will not be allowed any work release, furloughs, use of an alternative jail or any electronic monitoring in lieu of jail”.

    Not only that, when the judge ordered Paris to show up in court this morning to discuss this, but then fake sheriff to the stars Baca told her she didn’t have to show up she could just call in! Judge Michael T. Sauer was having none of it and ordered the sheriff’s department to pick her up and bring her to court.”

  9. “Instead of putting her in jail or under house arrest, they should make it so that anytime she wants to drive someplace, she has to carpool with Robert Blake and O.J. Simpson.”

    How about making her move to NY and take public transportation everywhere, Los Angeles lacking meaningful public transportation and all.

  10. “Instead of putting her in jail or under house arrest, they should make it so that anytime she wants to drive someplace, she has to carpool with Robert Blake and O.J. Simpson.”

    That’s hot!

  11. “Instead of putting her in jail or under house arrest, they should make it so that anytime she wants to drive someplace, she has to carpool with Robert Blake and O.J. Simpson.”–PAD

    Mmmm… not over reacting, are we?

    I mean, it’s obvious to this outsider that having your probation revoked for driving without a license in a reckless driving case is akin to getting away with murder!

    Say, why don’t we sweeten the pot and throw Michael Jackson in too! Add child molestation to her list of sins!

    And no, I’m not a Paris Hilton fan (although I’m a Hilton Honors Frequent Stay Member since last week); but it seems to me that America is suffering fat chick syndrome or Queen Bee envy. (Pick your poison)

    Either way I say we go after the Prom King, next! Say… Maybe we could get George Clooney. I mean, a lot of people already hate him, and I bet we could easily get him on a jaywalking charge. Who’s with me?

    Who wants to make an example out of him?; show the world that jaywalking is a serious offense and won’t be tolerated in America (unlike murder, child molestation, perjury and police brutality).

  12. And when FOX makes this their next reality show, we’ll have you to blame for giving them the idea.

    “Next on FOX, “Celebrity Carpool”!

  13. And when FOX makes this their next reality show, we’ll have you to blame for giving them the idea.

    “Next on FOX, “Celebrity Carpool”!

  14. Personally, I think drunk driving is a fairly serious offense. Your milage may, of course, vary…

  15. How about we just forbid her any publicity ever again?

    No books, no records, no television, no video (sorry guys), and no tabloids. Just having to live her life like a regular Jane.

  16. Paris Hilton is a celebrity. Like the lilly of the field, she toils not and neither does she spin.

    Personally, I think spending some time in the local jail would do the girl some good. Give her a different perspective on the world and its inhabitants than she has had up until this time. She really has never stood much of a chance to have a normal life.

  17. This Fall…on FOX….Paris and Nicole are back in: “The Simple Life: Prison Break”!!

  19. “Personally, I think drunk driving is a fairly serious offense. Your milage may, of course, vary…”–Patrick Calloway

    I agree. I wholeheartedly agree!

    But the girl had a .08 blood alcohol level, which is suppossed to be the legal limit.

    So, not only is she the first person in the history of the world to actually be telling the truth when she said she had less than a glass of whine; but she still got busted for it!

    That’s like getting flunked out of college with a solid 2.5 GPA!!!!

    I’m sorry, but I can’t help shake this feeling that Paris is like a stupid little guppy who can’t swim straight, in a tank full of boodthirsty media sharks, opportunistic political lions and online T-Rexes.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blood_alcohol_content

  21. The jail sentence wasn’t for drunk driving, it was for driving on a suspended license.

    She did the crime, she can do the time, not favoritism or special treatment for the wealthy and useless.

    She’s a giant waste of life and money. Her parents should be horribly ashamed of themselves and their child-rearing skills for letting her turn out this way.

    I believe “Family Guy” gets the nod for it’s parody featuting Paris and Nicole in prison, “Simple Life:Behind Bars” or something like that was the title…

  23. I don’t know. Maybe I’m not seeing the forest for the trees; but I thought the people of California pay enough taxes as it is. So wouldn’t the state of California be better off by collecting the $500,000 bounty on her picture than trying to enforce a 45 day prison sentence that is bleeding the county on account of their security fees, lawyer fees, media circus, traffic jams and who knows what else (I mean, I’m sure the judge is not working for free, either.)

    I know the saying goes “do the crime, do the time”; but in this particular instance I can’t help but think that most Americans just “do the fine” and Paris just happens to be todays the sacrificial lamb.

    Oh, well. At least it makes for a great bedtime story in which to scare little girls!

    “Don’t drive without a license or they’ll throw you in jail with Paris!”

    “Always wear underwear and never have sex with your boyfriend because if you do, he’ll post it in the internet, just like Paris’ did.”

  25. “Instead of putting her in jail or under house arrest, they should make it so that anytime she wants to drive someplace, she has to carpool with Robert Blake and O.J. Simpson.”–PAD

    Mmmm… not over reacting, are we?”

    Uh…no. We’re not. We’re just making a one-line joke that plays off the notion of famous people in LA getting away with stuff.

    PAD

  26. “How about making her move to NY and take public transportation everywhere, Los Angeles lacking meaningful public transportation and all.”

    Please don’t send her here. We have enough .. umm… challenges.

  27. red-Ricky: “But the girl had a .08 blood alcohol level, which is suppossed to be the legal limit.”

    California state law prohibits persons from driving a motor vehicle when their blood alcohol level (BAC) is a .08% or more.

  28. To clarify: California has two basic drunk driving laws, found in Vehicle Code section 23152, sections (a) and (b):

    23152(a) It is a misdemeanor to drive under the influence of alcohol and/or drugs.

    23152(b) It is a misdemeanor to drive with .08% or more of alcohol in your blood.

    Paris Hilton was driving while legally drunk. If she wasn’t, I somehow imagine she could afford a lawyer competent enough to beat a bad rap. So don’t make excuses for her and don’t vilify those who rightly condemn her. She broke a very serious law, then violated her probation repeatedly. Her imprisonment is just.

  29. 1″How about making her move to NY and take public transportation everywhere, Los Angeles lacking meaningful public transportation and all.

    Please don’t send her here. We have enough .. umm… challenges. “

    Lets just dump her off somewhere in Inwood or South Bronx at 2am. Everything should take care of itself from that moment on…

  31. Better yet, if she wants to stay at her little mansion with a ankle alarm, then she should be allowed to. Only, every other person in the jail at the same time gets to stay in her mansion with her.

  32. I sat and watched the Faux *ahem* Fox News Channel this afternoon for an hour and all they talked about was Paris Hilton. I couldn’t help wondering as I watched how many civilians and soldiers (on both sides) were bleeding and dying in Iraq, Afganistan, Croatia, Serbia, Somolia, ad infinitum… the U.S. military machine really learend the lesson of Vietnam:

    For God’s sake, don’t let the press record anything that might show the folks back home just how awful the war that’s being fought in their name *REALLY* is.

    Bread and Circuses, anyone?

  35. Honestly, the level of me caring is in the negatives. Cute joke though.

    Am I the only one surprised that even on this blog you can get a heated debate around Paris? I mean, if this were some argument about the proper punishment for drinking and driving and/or violating your probation, well, that I can see. I don’t have any first or last words beyond that.

  36. I think that Paris Hilton e should do some more pørņ.

    Now, what’s the topic that we’re discussing?

  37. Joseph Charpak: How about making her move to NY and take public transportation everywhere, Los Angeles lacking meaningful public transportation and all.
    Luigi Novi: Oh sure, force us straphangers to ride the subway with the skank.

  38. Manny wrote: ‘Make her listen to her own “music”.’

    Absolutely! I fully agree! I…hey, what’s that over there? (tucks copy of cd in hiding place)

  39. The Boss Man said:
    “Instead of putting her in jail or under house arrest, they should make it so that anytime she wants to drive someplace, she has to carpool with Robert Blake and O.J. Simpson.”

    That’s not a solution. That’s a premise to a sitcom. Look, Mr. D., we won’t say a thing about it and we promise not to steal your idea. Go ahead and write up a treatment really quick and pitch it. Given the current slate of new series for this fall (the Geico cavemen, more Bachelor, the Bionic Woman exhumation) they’re going to need more new series soon, and your intriguing premise sounds better than anything I’ve heard so far.

    And that includes the pilot about “carpooling” that this vaguely resembles. The show can even be spiced up with guest stars like Gary Coleman, Marie Osmond, Danny Bonaduce and Don Imus.

  40. Posted by Namora at June 8, 2007 07:38 PM

    Actually, shouldn’t she carpool with Lizzie Grubman?

    Or how about Ted Kennedy?

    MT

  41. What’s so great about the Paris Hilton anyway? If I ever get around to visiting France, I’m sure there are far better hotels in which to spend my nights. Honestly…

    Wildcat

  42. OJ’s free. Paris’ locked up.

    Obviously the System works.

    — Ken from Chicago

    P.S. And racism’s over–at least in Los Angeles.

  45. “Paris Hilton was driving while legally drunk. If she wasn’t, I somehow imagine she could afford a lawyer competent enough to beat a bad rap. So don’t make excuses for her and don’t vilify those who rightly condemn her. She broke a very serious law, then violated her probation repeatedly. Her imprisonment is just.”

    Actually, by setting such a ridiculously low limit as .08, Califorina makes it hard to take their definition of drunk driving very seriously.

    That said, Hilton should be serving her time in jail. She’s committed multiple violations, received several warnings, and her defense appears to be “But I’m too rich and special to go to jail!” Assuming that they can guarantee her safety – because she will be far more a target than the average person – she should serve her month and a half sentence as any other citizen would.

  46. >Actually, by setting such a ridiculously low limit as .08

    Don’t tell that to the extremists at MADD who feel this much too high a limit to begin with.

    Then again, they probably won’t be satisfied until Prohibition is brought back, with the death penalty enacted to enforce it. Lord knows they aren’t happy no matter how often penalties get jacked up.

  47. We shouldn’t be too harsh on Hilton and the other blonde bimbo. They can be useful object lessons. For instance, a friend in Japan asked me to tape the original SIMPLE LIFE for him. He’d then show clips from the episodes to his students as an example of how far down American society had fallen.

  48. Luke K. Walsh: “Actually, by setting such a ridiculously low limit as .08, Califorina makes it hard to take their definition of drunk driving very seriously.”

    The StarWolf: “Don’t tell that to the extremists at MADD who feel this much too high a limit to begin with.”

    It’s pretty simple. If you drink, don’t drive. If you can’t abstain, you may have a problem.

    I’m 35 years old and I occasionally get drunk or get stoned. In all these years I have managed to NEVER drive under the influence. It’s not that difficult to enjoy the inebriating effects the world has to offer without getting behind a wheel.

  50. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Bill, never say something like that again *EVER* in your entire life. I may have nightmares for weeks thanks to that.

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