We’ll make a deal: we’ll stop desecrating the flag and the Pledge of Allegiance when they stop desecrating the Constitution and the Bill of Rights.
Star Trek pledge of allegiance gets kid suspended: “Cory Doctorow:
A young Star Trek fan was suspended from school for reciting his own version of the Pledge of Allegiance, in which he pledged to the United Federation of Planets. His mom has posted the hilarious story:‘So, anyway. What did he do?’ I picked at the hem of my sweatshirt, looked just to the right of her face. I couldn’t meet her eyes. I felt nervous. I felt underdressed. I wondered where 8 was.
So she told me what he did. And as she told me, I started to laugh. I didn’t laugh a little, either, but I belly-laughed and grabbed my stomach. My son stood with his class this morning, put small right hand over heart, faced the American flag, and recited his own personal pledge of allegiance:
I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United Federation of Planets, and to the galaxy for which it stands, one universe, under everybody, with liberty and justice for all species.
‘Mrs. Jaworski. This isn’t humorous. The Pledge is an extremely important and patriotic moment each morning in the classroom. I am ashamed of your son’s behavior, and I hope you are, too.’
Link“
(Via Boing Boing.)
• 
Just cuz I was interested….
Here’s the whole thing:
Flowers are Red
by Harry Chapin
The little boy went first day of school
He got some crayons and started to draw
He put colors all over the paper
For colors was what he saw
And the teacher said.. What you doin’ young man
I’m paintin’ flowers he said
She said… It’s not the time for art young man
And anyway flowers are green and red
There’s a time for everything young man
And a way it should be done
You’ve got to show concern for everyone else
For you’re not the only one
And she said…
Flowers are red young man
Green leaves are green
There’s no need to see flowers any other way
Than they way they always have been seen
But the little boy said…
There are so many colors in the rainbow
So many colors in the morning sun
So many colors in the flower and I see every one
Well the teacher said.. You’re sassy
There’s ways that things should be
And you’ll paint flowers the way they are
So repeat after me…..
And she said…
Flowers are red young man
Green leaves are green
There’s no need to see flowers any other way
Than they way they always have been seen
But the little boy said…
There are so many colors in the rainbow
So many colors in the morning sun
So many colors in the flower and I see every one
The teacher put him in a corner
She said.. It’s for your own good..
And you won’t come out ’til you get it right
And are responding like you should
Well finally he got lonely
Frightened thoughts filled his head
And he went up to the teacher
And this is what he said.. and he said
Flowers are red, green leaves are green
There’s no need to see flowers any other way
Than the way they always have been seen
Time went by like it always does
And they moved to another town
And the little boy went to another school
And this is what he found
The teacher there was smilin’
She said…Painting should be fun
And there are so many colors in a flower
So let’s use every one
But that little boy painted flowers
In neat rows of green and red
And when the teacher asked him why
This is what he said.. and he said
Flowers are red, green leaves are green
There’s no need to see flowers any other way
Than the way they always have been seen.
“Still, given that public schools are governmentally-funded, you have as much of a right to “ad lib” the Pledge of Allegiance as you do to walk into a church and shouting “JESUS SUCKS!” over and over again during prayer or replacing the lyrics of the hymn you’re singing with those of your favorite Marilyn Manson ditty or some vintage Metallica. You also have the right to reap the repurcussions of those actions.”
Sorry, what? You are under no obligation whatsoever to recite the pledge of allegiance. My boys have asked me about it, and I’ve told them they can do whatever the hëll they want, say it or not, and I’ll back them up 100%. Local schools are funded by taxpayer dollars, not by some magic fderal ATM. The child has EVERY right as a to treat the POA as what it is: a lámëášš attempt to indoctrinate our children into unthinking America worship. It’s bûllšhìŧ, and I won’t stand for it.
You want them to truly love this country? Have them recite the Declaration of Independence and the Bill of Rights. My boys know more about our Founding Fathers than any of the other children in their classes. Believe me, they have a VERY deep love of country, and it isn’t coming from the fûçkìņg Pledge of Allegiance.
By the way, I’m not so fond of the Pledge of Allegiance.
Some people actually do things on their lunch breaks. I read blogs.
Does no one accept the possibility Craig’s comment was a summation of his feelings after reading numerous incidents which stretch the limits of credulity — most of them manufactured in the USA? PAD’s website lists example after example of such items. Perhaps this incident was one of many (the proverbial “straw that broke the camel’s back”) prompting Craig to submit his comment.
I’d say there are two reasons why nobody was imputing that to Mr Ries.
1) It isn’t what he said. He did say something along those lines subsequently, but not in the post in question.
2) This isn’t even a straw. It’s not a mote to trouble the mind’s eye, it’s not a grain of sand. It’s one teacher overreacting to a class clown. That’s it.
Mr Ries did finally write, Yeah, not to mention the homeless, jobless, and the millions without health care in this country.
Which have exactly what to do with this kid and this teacher? If your comment about this country disgusting you is a non sequitur, then just say so. My Civil War rant above was almost one. It’s okay.
Maybe it’s time YOU wake the hëll up and take a look around for once and realize there’s more important things that bìŧçhìņg and moaning over a pledge or a flag.
Yeah, that was kind of my reaction to your post. I think the proposed flag amendment is kind of retarded– I think P J O’Rourke was the one who compared a flag-burning amendment to killing a fly with an MX Missile– and I oppose that as a stupid and unnecessary intrusion into free speech, but this school discipline case is utterly unimportant.
1) It isn’t what he said. He did say something along those lines subsequently, but not in the post in question.
Oh, it’s what I said in the first place, but apparently my comments were beyond some here.
Yeah, that was kind of my reaction to your post.
Well, I hope that makes you feel special.
The point remains: if a teacher finds the patriotic duty of an 8 year old to be the most important thing on her agenda, then this country has some serious farking issues.
Things like this, flag burning and the pledge, are so far out there, that they’re not in left field, they’re beyond the wall, into the parking lot, and have just been run over by the team bus.
Craig: Can I drive the bus?
Do all us liberals have to sit at the back of the bus?
As noted at http://www.ericweisstein.com/fun/startrek/TheOmegaGlory.html
“Kirk recognizes the invocation as a distorted form of the Pledge of Allegiance, and surprises the Yangs by completing it unassisted.”
Another reason for disgust:
The Pentagon is building a database of information on 16 year olds to college students for military recruitment.
Info will include name, DOB, SS, email addresses (yes, nothing is sacred), even ethnicity (but, no, they’re not targetting anybody) and who knows what the hëll else.
Of course, the No Child Really Matters… err, No Child Left Behind law already requires schools to pass that info to recruiters, but nobody had put it into a database before.
But now? Well, we might as well start leaving kids behind if the military is only wanting to recruit them to send them off on some ridiculous war.
Of course, the really funny thing is that, in reality, there are black roses, white roses, yellow roses, etc.
“Do all us liberals have to sit at the back of the bus?”
I’d wager if the far right could have it’s way we liberals wouldn’t be allowed on the bus.
Brian Geers wrote: “I was brought to mind of the Calvin and Hobbes strip as well: ‘I pledge allegiance to Queen Frag and her mighty state of hysteria.'”
I miss Bill Watterson.
“Still, given that public schools are governmentally-funded, you have as much of a right to ‘ad lib’ the Pledge of Allegiance as you do to walk into a church and shouting ‘JESUS SUCKS!’ over and over again during prayer…”
That analogy is only good if you’re regularly tithing to the church, isn’t it? “Government funded” is a bit misleading, since the government is funded (in part) by me (and you, and Peter, and…)
On a different note, Isn’t Matt Feazell one of the best illustrators ever?? I’d like to see him on Batman.
“I’d wager if the far right could have it’s way we liberals wouldn’t be allowed on the bus.”
AT the VERY least, we’d be barred from the right side of the bus.
“Sorry, what? You are under no obligation whatsoever to recite the pledge of allegiance. My boys have asked me about it, and I’ve told them they can do whatever the hëll they want, say it or not, and I’ll back them up 100%. Local schools are funded by taxpayer dollars, not by some magic fderal ATM. The child has EVERY right as a to treat the POA as what it is: a lámëášš attempt to indoctrinate our children into unthinking America worship. It’s bûllšhìŧ, and I won’t stand for it.”
Hiya, Knuck. Can I call you Knuck? Let me clear a few things up lest you suffer from the misconception that I’m a rah-rah, Dubyah-Is-Gud, Let’s-Nuke-Iraq-And-Have-Done-With-It sort who thinks that that whole “Anti-Flag Burning Amendment” is actually a good idea:
I wasn’t saying that they were obligated to say the pledge, and I’m sorry that you thought I implied such. In fact, I’d made the example earlier in my little diatribe that I’d encountered in my own K-12 experience several students with valid reason not to recite the pledge. Choosing not to say the pledge -is- perfectly acceptable if it doesn’t gel with your personal, patriotic, or religious beliefs, I agree. Choosing to say something else entirely during that time is opening up a whole different can of worms. It’s rude and disrespectful (although the Trekker and the subversive in me both agree that this particular circumstance is highly amusing), and rather than risk losing control of her classroom, the teacher opted to discipline the child.
I do think that the actual punishment was rather extreme and that the teacher has a wee bit too much blind, rabid patriotism going on.
(And as a side note, as far as the government is concerned, taxpayers ARE viewed as a magical federal ATM. At the end of the day, it’s the government, not the taxpayer, that decides how schools are run. As a taxpayer, I sure as shootin’ didn’t want the ham-handed, half-***ed legislation that is “No Child Left Behind”, but I can’t opt not to pay taxes because of that)
Might I suggest reading James Clavell’s excellent short story A Children’s Story?
That being offered, I think what the kid did was cool – and if it isn’t true, it should be.
“I sure as shootin’ didn’t want the ham-handed, half-***ed legislation that is “No Child Left Behind”, but I can’t opt not to pay taxes because of that)”
Weeeeeellllll…. you COULD, you’d just get penalties and late fees out the ying-yang and eventually end up in jail.
“Weeeeeellllll…. you COULD, you’d just get penalties and late fees out the ying-yang and eventually end up in jail.”
…which again brings me back to the whole action/consequence thing that I was on about in my first reply. I love symmetry. Don’t you? 🙂
OK Genious Greer,
What are fair “Consequences” of free speech?
What right does anyone have to punish another just because they don’t agree with their words?
I certainly hope you aren’t one of those morons who say :”Iffin’ you have the right to burn the flag/not say thepledge, then I have the right to kick your un-american ášš!” retards are you?
If this was a first offense, it was too harsh a punishment. If it’s repeated… well, a teacher does have a right to keep order in her classroom.
RedNeck dictionary
RETARD – verb. To stop working. Usage: “My grampaw retard at age 65.”
Seriously, tho. Can we find a different word to use other than “retard”??
Brian: ‘Knuck’, ‘Knucks’ or even ‘Úš-Fáçë’ is fine. And I won’t disagree with you about it being disrespectful. However, from the way the story was related, that isn’t what set off the teacher and principal. It was that it was ‘unpatriotic’. Schools should not be where patriotism is enforced. That’s really my gripe. And yes, it makes me cranky (of course, part of what really pìššëš me off is that I can’t make cymbal noises during the National Anthem at hockey games any longer without drawing nasty looks).
“And as a side note, as far as the government is concerned, taxpayers ARE viewed as a magical federal ATM. At the end of the day, it’s the government, not the taxpayer, that decides how schools are run. As a taxpayer, I sure as shootin’ didn’t want the ham-handed, half-***ed legislation that is “No Child Left Behind”, but I can’t opt not to pay taxes because of that.”
Ahh, the magic of representative democracy.
I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United Federation of Planets, and to the galaxy for which it stands, one universe, under everybody, with liberty and justice for all species.
What a great pledge! Kudos to the kid.
Rich
The kid should have said it with Shatner’s famous dramatic pauses.
“I . . . pledge allegiance . . . to the flag . . . “
I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United Federation of Planets, and to the galaxy for which it stands, one universe, under everybody, with liberty and justice for all species.
This story was kinda cool, but my first thought was “how many times does he get his ášš kicked for being such a geek/nerd/whatever?”
BB: Funny, that was my first thought as well.
“…With logic and Pon Farrs for all…” 😀
I stopped saying that fascist pledge when I was around that kid’s age. Eventually, I stopped standing up for it.
I’m suprised people are saying that it’s just one incident and that it doesn’t really matter. This kind of bûllšhìŧ is happening all the time, and, yes, it’s sickening.
My favorite analogy for this sort of behavior comes from Douglas Adams, who wrote about man’s ancestors trying to invent the wheel, but they were having trouble with it because they couldn’t figure out what color it should be.
People like that teacher are just coloring wheels.
OK Genious Greer,
What are fair “Consequences” of free speech?
What right does anyone have to punish another just because they don’t agree with their words?
I certainly hope you aren’t one of those morons who say :”Iffin’ you have the right to burn the flag/not say thepledge, then I have the right to kick your un-american ášš!” retards are you?
Actually, using his point about actions and consequences, wouldn’t the people who beat up the flag-burner have to face the consequences of their own actions, which they took in reaction to the original action of the acting flag-burner, who was acting out in reaction to the action or action of another active party?
Sorry, it’s a boring afternoon at work…
Yeah, and if you’ll all imagine that the rest of what I quoted from Bladestar’s post is also italicized, I’d greatly appreciate it.
Knuckles:
How about Knuckster, Knuckinator, or Knyuck-Nyuk-Nyuk? 🙂
I have to agree with you about the teacher’s attitude. It’s a public school teacher’s place to teach (and discipline as necessary), but not to enforce doctrine or shove personal beliefs down her students’ throats.
I also agree that it’s patently unfair that you can’t simulate instrumental accompanyment at the hockey game of your choice, but at this point, I think that’s more the fault of the narrow-mindedness of the NHL and the NHLPA than it is of your fellow spectators (I needs me my Flyers fix!). 😛
Bladestar:
I kind of wish people wouldn’t lock onto one sentence of my posts, twist the context, and make it look like I’m evil incarnate. Therefore, before I dodge the next barrage of slings and arrows, I have to ask this: Where do -you- draw the line of demarcation of where “Free Speech” begins and ends? Could a student call walk up to this teacher, call her a fat, narrowminded, Bush-bøffìņg, right-wing douchebag in front of her entire class without fear of reprisal?
Here’s the Reader’s Digest Version of my opinions on the issues at hand here for people who can’t stand the big, meandering paragraphs of meaningless drivel that I tend to write:
Do I feel that the consequences our young Trekkie friend endured were extremely harsh? Heck yes!
Do I feel that people have a right to NOT say the Pledge of Allegiance? Darn straight I do!
Did I think that the “revisionist” version of the pledge was funny? You’d better believe it!
I’m sorry. I try to be as even-handed in my arguments as possible. I don’t think there’s a black or a white to this and neither student or teacher is 100% blame-free. I just want to go back to laughing at the funny part and save the political subtext for people who actually like that sort of thing.
Can we do that? Please?
Personally, I’m on the same page as Steve here. The world would be a bit of a better place if there was a little more “logic and Pon Farrs for all.” 🙂
Reading all these posts, I have decided that America is just too horrible to bear.
The oppression and poverty of the world’s freeest, richest nation are just too much to bear.
I refuse to say any fascist pledge to “the world’s last, best hope.”
Long live anywhere but America!
Down with America — the worst nation on earth (except for all the others)!
I stop reading a post as soon as someone refers to the country as “fascist.” I think it’s a subclause in Godwin’s Law.
Oh man, now this is a funny story.
And to think I got such crap for refusing to recite it when I was in high school.
I shared this story with my mom at the dinner table, and she burst out laughing.
Wow, some of you US people do take this pledge seriously, don’t you!
Us brits, we just got a bunch of weirdos for royals and a load of weirdos in power.
Suddently the Trek ideals seem a lot more attractive 😀
Mr Ries: Oh, it’s what I said in the first place, but apparently my comments were beyond some here.
Yes, they were, because as we all know mind-reading is only possible with people who are in physical contact, preferably between fingertips and the parts of the face where the neural pathways are closest to the surface. You said nothing of the sort; you made some crack about omitting “under God,” and then said this country disgusts you “any more” [sic]. You said nothing about this being a symptom of a larger problem, and the implication is so faint as to be invisible.
And I disagree with the substantive point, whenever you made it.
Well, I hope that makes you feel special.
Yes, they give me my own short bus and everything.
The point remains: if a teacher finds the patriotic duty of an 8 year old to be the most important thing on her agenda, then this country has some serious farking issues.
And in a similar vein, Mr Fuller wrote: I’m suprised people are saying that it’s just one incident and that it doesn’t really matter. This kind of bûllšhìŧ is happening all the time, and, yes, it’s sickening.
No, it isn’t sickening. The child abuse case I have on the calendar for next week, in which the mother can’t even be bothered to bring her child in for trial preparation, is sickening. The Abu Ghraib mess is sickening, and the Guantanamo Bay allegations, if true, are sickening. The murder of Kitty Genovese was sickening, and the non-response of the onlookers was more sickening. That people find time to be outraged by this picayune nonsense, when there are real outrages in the world, is sickening.
This is one child clowning around in an amusing fashion, and one teacher overreacting. If he’d launched into a discussion of warp engines during a science class, the behavior would have been precisely the same, but nobody would have cared. But because an eight year old kid, who almost certainly has no political objectives of his own, happened to choose a political hot-button in which to show off, you’re sickened by school discipline. This is as asinine as the humorless principal’s behavior.
Man. EGREGIOUS overreaction by the principal and teacher. Nice – and idealistic, too – pledge by the boy. I like your pledge, too, Aaron Thall :).
(And Steve Chung’s Star Trek pledge, like the original, also has something to shoot for ;).)
PAD and BBayliss – Chapin’s song is an interesting, well-written piece of art … and pretty freaking depressing.
Knuckles – funny post – “By the way, I’m not so fond of the Pledge of Allegience.” – HA! And I wholly agree with the sentiments you expressed in the post, too.
/// What you have to realize is that teachers today look for any signs of individuality in children and stamp them out as quickly as possible. ///
This is nothing new, I’m in my late 30’s and I can remember Teachers doing this when I was in school, not every teacher in every school mind you but enough that I have bad memories of the ones who did. History is filled with incredibly creative people who did horribly in school because of teachers and school officials who did not have a clue how to foster thier creativity and instead tried to stomp it out.
David Bjorlin:
I googled the website because I was looking for pictures of people doing the pledge of allegiance the old fashion way. I completely ignored the dribble.
I should have used a better site, like wikipedia.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pledge_of_Allegiance
Also, kk49 is the account name I was given in college, because my initials are kek.
“PAD has posted more than a few of these disgusting incidents, yet they keep happening.”
—–
SHOCKING!
Even though Peter David HIMSELF posts about these things… they STILL keep happening!
This is an outrage!
America must conform to this site, and whatever it says!
At all times!
This is an order!
X-ray,
I wholeheartedly agree with you on the idea that yeah, you should be forced to prove that everything involved with pørņ is legal. I mean, child abuse is the most disgusting thing in the world. However, the burden of proof should be placed on those who take the pictures. Still, I can imagine how horrible it would be if *Gasp* Borders was forced to keep those records. It’s called E-mail folks, just e-mail the dang records. Now, about your last post here. No the world is not required to conform to Mr. David’s standards. That comment was about how more of these incidents always happens no matter how much outrage is expressed. And America is still the greatest, freest country in the world. We just want it to stay that way.
oops.. ment to post that in the “More new censorship” one. sorry.
That is freaking hliarious. If I was that school I would be embarassed
1First, let me just say that I’m glad one of us Trekies finally had the idea to write a pledge to the Federation. A child shall led us and its true. Second, I would rather pledge myself to an ideal that I beileve in and not some piece of cloth made by sweat shop labors in Taiwan. For almost forty years fictional characters like Kirk, Picard, Sisko, Archer, and Janeway have shown us that humans can be better than we think we can be. Pledging allegence to something George Bush has soild is not taking us in the right dirction. Last, Peter since Shore Leave is coming up, I say you should lead us in the Pledge to the Federation and that we should all rededicate our lives to making America and Earth has a whole the future birthplace of the real United Federation of Planets.
(Places hands on both hearts)
I pledge allegiance to the Timelords of Gallifrey, and to the Tardis for which it serves, one Terry Nation, under nine Doctors, and jelly babies for all.
That people find time to be outraged by this picayune nonsense, when there are real outrages in the world, is sickening.
Yet, here you are, bìŧçhìņg and whining about my posts.
You apparently still miss the point of my comments, because what I quoted from you IS my point.
But incidents such as this one, with the kid and the pledge, illustrate what is wrong with our society. It may be inconsequential in the grand scheme of things, but the fact that it happens at all should still piss people off.
It shouldn’t take a 9/11 to get people to act to straighten things out. But, apparently, it does.
Instead of worrying about the education in this country that appears to be worsening, the principal spends her time going all patriotic on the mother.
That kid deserves a better school, but people like that principal aren’t going to give it to him.
That Chapin song has a strong message, but I think it’s silly to try and apply it here. This student wasn’t being creative or expressing himself or whatever — he was clowning around. If the teacher had asked him what 4 + 5 was and he’d replied “20XX,” the situation would really be no different, but who here would be reacting with such outrage?
Reciting the Pledge is a rule. You break the rules, you get punished. That’s how kids are taught everywhere in the world. The teacher probably overdid it a bit, but demonizing her for having the gall to do her job is ridiculous. This is not in the remotest sense a case of “desecrating the Constitution and the Bill of Rights.”
– Z
Zeke, why is it “a rule” that our children be forced to recite a loyalty pledge, by rote, at the beginning of each school day? Are we so terrified that our children might grow up as terrorists that we must enforce their loyalty before they can critically analyze the concept? Loyalty to a symbol, yet, not the country itself?
Personally, I think the boy was mocking a ridiculous concept – something with which I agree wholeheartedly. The principal’s reaction (he didn’t say, “The boy is being disruptive”; he said it was unpatriotic) underlines the point brilliantly.
“(Places hands on both hearts)
I pledge allegiance to the Timelords of Gallifrey, and to the Tardis for which it serves, one Terry Nation, under nine Doctors, and jelly babies for all.”
I love yah, Steve. That’s perfect.
I wrote That people find time to be outraged by this picayune nonsense, when there are real outrages in the world, is sickening.
Mr Ries responded, Yet, here you are, bìŧçhìņg and whining about my posts.
Yes, but I freely admit that I’m anal.
You apparently still miss the point of my comments, because what I quoted from you IS my point.
If you’re trying to make the point that it’s disturbing when either political party becomes caught up in minutia to the detriment of more important issues, I’ll agree with you. If that’s what you meant to say to begin with, great, but what you actually said was much less insightful.
But incidents such as this one, with the kid and the pledge, illustrate what is wrong with our society. It may be inconsequential in the grand scheme of things, but the fact that it happens at all should still piss people off.
Inconsequential in the grand scheme of things? Hëll, it’s inconsequential in that third grader’s academic year. It’s stupid, it’s petty, and it’s emblematic of what disgusts you about this country. I find it difficult to believe that any intelligent person could find that to be in any way representative of the problems our nation faces. (Unless, again, you’re taking the principal’s overreaction to a triviality to be symptomatic of a national tendency to be distracted by minutia.) Explain it to me. I’m not being sarcastic; I honestly don’t understand the reasoning, and I’d like to.
It shouldn’t take a 9/11 to get people to act to straighten things out. But, apparently, it does.
Actually, I don’t think even 9/11 has gotten people to straighten much out. The country came together for what, two months?
Instead of worrying about the education in this country that appears to be worsening, the principal spends her time going all patriotic on the mother.
That kid deserves a better school, but people like that principal aren’t going to give it to him.
Actually, if people like her can restore discipline in the school system, that’s going to do a lot more for her students and her community than you can imagine. If she can pull that off, I won’t care that she’s a humorless martinet. Indeed, those characteristics might help. And before you say that’s a secondary consideration, I challenge you to go down to your local juvenile courtroom and watch for a session or two. And then go into misdemeanor criminal court and watch what happens when they grow up. Teaching our kids self-discipline and self-control is as important as teaching them to read.