Since I’ve got my bowling league tonight, Kathleen will step in and make observations on both our behalves. Swing by!
PAD
Babylon 5: An Overview
Originally published February 6, 2012, in Comics Buyer’s Guide #1264
“It’s not going to be as good.”
That’s what I heard fans muttering when word broke of the syndication deal that would provide Babylon 5 with a regular slot on TNT, aired five times a week in a time slot that—unlike in many cities—wasn’t at such a hideous hour of the morning that viewing it required either a VCR or a healthy shot of No-Doze.
An Open Request to Mitt Romney
Governor: allow me to warn you off a particular direction that your advisors seem to be taking you, as per the New York Times. According to the newspaper of record:
Mr. Romney’s team has concluded that debates are about creating moments and has equipped him with a series of zingers that he has memorized and has been practicing on aides since August.
Please don’t do this. I mean, yes, I want to see you crash and burn in the elections, but I also have a fundamental sense of decency.
Do not do this to yourself.
You’re not funny.
Your aides claim that you have a dry wit. No. Jack Benny had a dry wit. You are a modern day Jack Benny in the sense that in modern day, Jack Benny is dead.
I know the temptation is great to aim for the sound bite audience. After all, most Americans are ADD when it comes to serious political topics and have a much easier time wrapping what passes for their brains around jokes, quips, and memorable bon mots. And you probably figure that Obama is a stiff and thus an easy target. I think that’s a serious miscalculation. Obama was able to crack jokes about bin Laden at the same time that he was dispatching Seal Team Six to cap him. Obama is funny in the clutch; you’re funny as a crutch.
In my opinion, the absolute worst thing you can do is go into the debates under the impression that you’re going to be a conservative pundit a la Stephen Colbert. Governor, I’ve met Stephen Colbert. I’ve watched Stephen Colbert. Stephen Colbert is an acquaintance of mine. You,sir, are no Stephen Colbert.
PAD
Where Man Peter, and More
Originally published January 30, 1998, in Comics Buyer’s Guide #1263
Although I’m still getting letters sent in to “Where Man Peter,” the special-interest aspect of the column in which I asked for descriptions of oddities that folks in publishing have found in unsolicited manuscripts, something had been brought to my attention that deserves to be attended to immediately.
The Muppet Tour
Originally published January 23, 1998, in Comics Buyer’s Guide #1262
It was a perfectly nondescript townhouse in New York City.
I stood there and scanned it carefully for a moment, to see if I was missing anything. Perhaps there was something small and hidden, something I wasn’t seeing. A flipper mark, perhaps, or a stained glass window with a bear in it. But there was absolutely nothing. It was quiet, understated, no markings of any kind whatsoever. You could have stared at it for hours and garnered nothing about the inside by the exterior.
The Most Awards 1997
Originally published January 16, 1998, in Comics Buyer’s Guide #1261
Yes, it’s that time of year again. The time when we here (okay, me here) at BID issue—The Most Awards. Yes, named for no particular reason after Donny Most (Ralph on Happy Days), The Most Awards are a sort of stream-of-consciousness commentary on whatever caught my fancy or whatever I think is worth making a snide remark about that I somehow missed. May I have the envelopes, please?
Insane Doctor Who Scenario
I’m not marking this as a spoiler because it’s just me doing totally nuts speculation.
The Doctor and River Song actually produce a child. The child is a foundling and adopted in the late 1980s by Mr. and Mrs. Pond. They name her “Amy” and raise her as their own. Amy, in a story development that Heinlein would approve of, grows up and gives birth to her own mother. And in her final appearance, on the verge of death (via accident or perhaps simply old age) Amy Pond regenerates into the Doctor’s new companion.
I’m sure it’s not remotely right, but it’s fun to think about.
PAD
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