I have no idea why. I just am.
Mr. Lance Shaw was my eighth grade history teacher when I was living in Verona, NJ. But before I had him in eighth grade, I heard about him in seventh grade. All the eighth graders would tell us how awful he was. That he was relentlessly brutal, demanding. That he worked them ragged. The horror stories about Mr. Shaw were legendary and if you wound up getting him, then God help you.
When I got my eighth grade schedule and found I had Mr. Shaw as a teacher, my heart sank. I cannot tell you how much I dreaded the class.
On the first day, we filed in, and every student was nervous. We’d all heard the horror stories. Once the bell rang, Shaw surveyed us a moment.
Then he said the following:
“I have two rules. The first is that you will address me as King Shaw or Your Highness.”
We all exchanged confused looks.
“And the second rule is that you will spend from now until the end of the school year telling all the seventh graders what a terrible and terrifying teacher I am. I want you to petrify them.”
That’s when we realized. It was a joke. A massive school-wide joke. Shaw was, in fact, a perfectly nice guy, a great teacher, and had a snarky sense of humor. He had been using his students to spread awful rumors about him so that new students would be terrified of him at first and then love the notion that, No, Shaw’s not a bad guy, we’re just hosing everyone else in the school.
And naturally when we got out of the class and went to lunch, the first thing we did was terrorize the seventh graders about Mr. Shaw.
I’ve no idea whatever happened to him after that, of course, but I hope he stuck with teaching. He was great.
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What a great story!
🙂
Dang. Wish I taught at a larger school; if I did I’d be sorely tempted to try this scam myself. As it is, way too many kids know me by the time they get into my class; I’d never be able to pull it off.
Awesome story; thanks for the warmth you just added to my evening!
Ah ha ha ah, that’s awesome. Too late for me to pull this off but that’s great.
LOL. I wish I had your experiences with grade school teachers, Peter. I had at least two teachers in my school who were abusive monsters to anyone who didn’t fit their ideal of the Teacher’s Pet, and they appear in some of my worst memories of childhood.
That is a great story. When I was in 2nd grade I had a teacher named Mr. Friedman. Every couple of months he wold darken the lights and tell us these creepy stories (I thought from memory, but to be honest I am no longer sure) They scared the šhìŧ out of us. I was years later when I was in the Science Fiction and Fantasy Club in high school at the choice for our readings was Lovecraft. As I read it, all I thought to myself was that son of a bìŧçh. He read us Lovecraft to 2nd graders. I am sure today he would be fired instantly but we all thought it was great!
One day when Shana was about six years old, she had given us a miserable day. She drove us nuts. And as I was settling her down for bed that evening, she asked me to read her a story.
So I read her “The Tell-Tale Heart.” Full throated, right down to roaring the last words of the story. “I admit the deed! –tear up the planks! here, here! –It is the beating of his hideous heart!” Then I smiled and said, “Good night, honey,” and walked out, leaving her absolutely petrified. Also spawned her life-long interest in Poe.
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“And that’s when I shot him, Your Honor.”
My favorite teacher was Mr. Yutzy. He taught high school debate, psychology, and a few other things.
All my siblings had already had him, so I’d heard plenty of stories about him. They were all great stories, so I was really looking forward to meeting Mr. Yutzy and taking his class. Then I walked into class on the first day of high school.
It was Bob, from my Tae Kwon Do class.
I had literally thrown this guy around.
He was great. He was the kind of teacher who really tried to stimulate thought. He once told us that he didn’t think he was doing his job if he din’t get at least two complaints from parents a year.