I keep thinking about the whole Roman Polanski thing. And I totally get where his supporters are coming from. If the judge, supposedly hungry for publicity, had accepted the plea deal instead of tossing it, then this would long be over. And his victim says that she has long ago moved on and seems to have more of a grudge with the media than her assailant. And I get that because of his advanced age, any jail time is basically a life sentence.
I get all that.
But what I keep coming back around to is this: If it had been one of my thirteen year old daughters who’d been drugged and raped, I’d be sitting in the front row in the courtroom waiting to see the bášŧárd sentenced. And I wouldn’t give a rip about his Oscar or his advanced age or anything except what he did to my little girl.
But that could just be me.
PAD
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I do not claim to speak for Sean Martin: I merely saw his situation as interesting. He may be relieved to know I do not now, nor have I ever claimed him as a personal friend. There: Perhaps he can now live a happy life without that to stain his record.
Sean Martin: I thought my previous comment had explained what I meant about the “no family” rule, but I will try to be more clear. In most cases, PAD does not bring this subject into the discussion. In those cases, it is boorish and perhaps threatening to bring them up. He has forbidden that on his site, and that is fine. In some cases – not very many, I think – he does bring them up, and makes them central to his post. In that case, it is still very wise to avoid referring to them, but it is not quite as easy to do so as in the first case.
Jeffrey –
At the risk of speaking for Peter, I doubt he’d object to anyone bringing up his family in the context or light that he does. You seem to be saying he would object to anyone merely mentioning them.
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I doubt it is the act of referring to his family that he would oppose. That you can’t seem to make this distinction suggest you are searching for something to be able to criticize him for.
He has made it clear than any but the most glancing mention of his family is ill-advised. I do not disagree with this. Whether or not there is ill intent, things can very quickly become intolerable. It’s a good rule. There is an understandable impulse to weigh in in what one may feel very certain is a friendly matter, but things move on from there. This is not at all the same as another incident. An adult person related to PAD in a manner it is best not to mention wrote in her own column about the death of Gary Gygax in March of 2008. I thought this person was being rudely flippant about the death of a real human being, and wrote just that in a comment to her blog. It was my impression that this person was writing her own opinions in her own blog, rather than the one PAD operates right here, and that she is a grown up who can be trusted to speak for herself. It was PAD’s impression that this person needed his loud and outraged protection from a person such as I speaking unkindly to her. In context, it was obvious that he thought her blog nothing but a subheading of this blog, and her thoughts nothing but glosses on his own. So this paragon of wit, balance and wisdom thought my post insulted this person, obviously. I’m just glad I didn’t write anything so dismissive as treating her as a delicate imbecile who must be protected from the cruel world by big, strong PAD and insulated from criticism of her foolish thoughts. That would have been pretty bad, wouldn’t you say?
And so the origin of the grudge is revealed.
Oh, Jesus Christ, Frawley, give it the fûçk up and go the fûçk away.
Oh Sean…
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Frawley’s grudge predates that by years. He came to this blog years before that and both he and PAD referenced Frawley’s constant sniping at PAD on a comic book board that PAD hadn’t been a regular poster on for some time.
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Honestly, after his stupidity on the Gary Gygax thread a lot of people started just ignoring him most of the time. Probably the best way to deal with him since, when given the opening, he’ll steer conversations into garbage like this or find some other way to grind his personal ax with PAD.
Good grief, let it go. If you’re angry that he made you look bad you aren’t going to win back any points by whining about it.
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Fact: there is not, so far as I can see, anyone who thinks you are coming off well here. You can chalk that up to your being a uniquely brave voice in an ocean of lemming like fanboys but really, who’s going to believe that? Anyone who has been here for any length of time knows that isn’t the case and any casual readers just coming upon this could not possibly give a yellow rat’s ášš.
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It’s frustrating to quit while you are behind but there are far worse alternatives.
Sean: It is of course exactly as you say. People routinely have mentioned or chatted about various members of my family. I just draw the line at insults. Almost everyone understands that.
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PAD
Oh and Sean; I believe the “rudely flippant” comment he claims Kathleen made about Gygax was something on the order of “The dice have gone silent” or something equally not at all rude or flippant. Yep, it’s just that ridiculous. Verbal self immolation if you ask me and it’s a pity since (unlike certain other trolls whose names will go unmentioned lest they, like Candyman or Bloody Mary, manifest themselves from whatever Stygian depths they have slunk off to) he has the ability to make an interesting, coherent thought when he isn’t letting his agenda cloud everything. But at this point, the agenda seems to be the only thing.
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Here. Judge for yourself, Sean.
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The Dice are Silent
http://kathwp.malibulist.com/index.php/2008/03/04/the-dice-are-silent/comment-page-1/#comments
Yikes! Worse than I expected.
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What a childish áššhølë. Clearly seeking cause to play the victim where none exists.
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He’s really kinda sad, actually.
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Works for me.
However, having read the previous screed, (with Tuska and Soupy fresh in my mind) I was involuntarily forced to think about the sad day (in the distant future, I pray) that PAD does join the bleedin’ choir invisible. I hope that some talented artist draws a row of cemetary plots showing a headstone, a statue, a monument, and a pebble … with a thought balloon coming from beneath the ground containing “I got a rock.”
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(This is intended as irreverent, but if any portion seems rude, then it is undoubtedly a failing in my abilities, for which I apologize.)
Hollie, Although I consider PAD an egotistical jerk, it would be insensitive to his family and dismissive of his real accomplishments to reduce his death to a punchline. I’m planning to hold my very aged tongue when that day comes. You should as well, if your sense of propriety hasn’t improved.
That’s really funny. I like that.
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Actually, I’ve discussed a variety of funny epitaphs for my headstone with Kathleen. Haven’t settled on one yet.
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PAD
Assuming you don’t precede him in the great beyond, of course. rest assured, should that unhappy day come there will be no punchlines or anything else likely to be said about it in these parts.
Jeffery,
Enough already. What’s ironic is this thread started with people who normally disagree a great deal with each other – and quite frequently – actually coming together against the support of Polanski by the Hollywood community and you are ending it by having people who normally disagree with each other – and frequently – because your constant harping on PAD seems personal and totally out of proportion to what he said. heck, I can think of a few times PAD seemed to throw a tantrum or be less than reasonable – at least in my eyes – on certain issues and I can’t recall ANYONE bashing him – like you have – in those instances, let alone for a statement that was fairly inoccuous.
PAD is not perfect and has never claimed to be. But he is our host and deserves some basic respect instead of the gratuitous bashing you seem determined to give him.
As a result, people who might normally side with you are being turned off. The shame is that you do seem bright, but that brightness seems like it is being eclipsed by dark, irrational anger.
PAD is due the respect of recognizing his talent and professional accomplishments. Beyond that, he’s on his own. Circling back to the Roman Polanski case (which is, after all, the topic of this thread), certain admirers of Polanski are applying the same sort of faulty reasoning to the case as you counsel here: Roman Polanski has made a fairly extensive number of excellent films: Some of his fans think this signifies he should be held blameless for raping a child, but I don’t think this follows. PAD has quite a bit of good writing on his resume: Some of his fans think this signifies he should be immune to criticism, but I don’t think this follows.
Although this is almost certain to come back and bite me, let me offer a small suggestion. When one is attempting to sound reasonable and judicious it is a good idea to spell the name of the person to whom you are responding correctly. Right or wrong, this kind of orthographic sloppiness looks like poor thinking. People who might normally side with you might be turned off.
Jeffrey,
Hit the wrong keys before. I’m fallible. Worse yet, I’ve given you a reason – however slight – to be a condescending prìçk to me.
Oh, by the way, my “sloppy thinking” has enabled me to write professionally about a subject I love for years, travel many wonderful places and meet people I truly admire. Your thinking has you continually bash a talented writer in response to little or no provocation. Someone you even admit you don’t like or respect.
“As for my statement about PAD, you have quoted me very accurately. As Mr. David feels so strongly about freedom of speech, I will ask you, so what? If truthfulness is a defense, it is true: I don’t like or respect him, and that is why I said so. You ask why I stick around here (by which I suppose you mean his own blog, since this is something else). I do that because I wish to, which is all of the explanation you deserve.”
Yes, you’ll argue it’s your choice. But don’t you have anything more enjoyable or productive to do with your time? Life is too short.
I think he’s going for the old lawyer’s saying: If the law is against you, bang on the facts. If the facts are against you, bang on the law. If both are against you, bang on the table.
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Gotta say one thing about PAD–he attracts an interesting group of trolls. Far right who hate his politics, far left who just hate anyone who doesn’t tote the line 100% and get uppity when misquoted, a few that defy characterization.
Jerome Maida:
Congratulations on writing professionally about a subject you love for years and all the rest. As I have never read your professional work (Well, I haven’t, so it’s not particularly condescending to say so), this has no effect positive or negative on my impression of your posts. “Condescending prìçk”? If you’ve been writing professionally for years, you already know that typographical errors hurt one’s credibility. You may wish they didn’t, but that’s the case. If I didn’t know what a fine fellow you are (You’ve done a rather grammatical and well-spelled job of proclaiming this), I would suspect that your feigned solicitude for my enjoyment and productivity was nothing but being a condescending prìçk. I am certainly glad to have avoided that error.
I was just speaking to my big sister about this yesterday. I also noticed a blog on this over at the bowa website. Isnt it weird how these things pop up in waves. to be honest, it is sort of intimidating.