So we were heading back from the “To Be CONtinued” convention in Chicago. A decent if not huge attendance, but I try to support regional SF cons where I can. The crew running it was enthusiastic and attentive, and everyone had a good time, I thought.
I was sitting next to Caroline on the flight back. She drank a bottle of cold milk during take-off, which was good, because the sucking kept her ears from getting clogged during the climb in altitude. During the flight, she smiled, she burbled, then she started to drift and her eyelids were closing.
And then we hit turbulence.
Forty-five minutes of it.
Poor Ariel desperately needed to go to the bathroom, but she wouldn’t go when the fasten seatbelt sign was on, and during the brief moments when they’d shut it off, others would sprint past her before she could get up.
Naturally Caroline, who carries her bathroom in her pants, wasn’t concerned about that. The eyes continued to close, close…
And then, with one final jostle of turbulence as the plane headed toward the airport, her eyes snapped open and the milk made its triumphant return through her mouth.
Everywhere. Everywhere. I grabbed into the seat pouch for a barf bag. None. Of course. Wasted precious seconds finding another, tried to get it in front of her mouth. Automatically she yanked her face away from the bag and decorated me with the remainder of her stomach’s contents.
Being barfed on by your kid is one of those few life experiences where, no matter how many times it’s happened to you before, each time is like the first.
Her little Easter outfit was shot, as was the interior lining of her chair. I unbuckled my seat belt and changed her out of her outfit into another “emergency” outfit Kath had packed in the diaper back, trying to hold the squirming vomit-covered crying infant while hoping no flight attendant would come over and tell me I had to be buckled in. Didn’t happen; I suspect the crew wanted no part of the whole mess, and I for one don’t blame them.
The one advantage was that I was able to get her off the plane quickly upon landing. People stood up in the aisle to start getting their stuff from the overhead. I rose with the bedraggled infant in my arms, facing out, and announced, “Pardon me. Anyone care to stand in the way of a baby who just barfed?” They parted like the Red Sea…which I guess made it Caroline’s way of contributing to the whole Passover experience.
I’d been hesitant to give her baby dramamine before the flight because, yes, it knocks the kid out and avoids these problems, but the child often wakes up *incredibly* cranky. So I figured I’d take the risk with the relatively short flight.
Nice risk taking there, David.
PAD
• 
Let’s just hope her Passover contributions aren’t on some kind of graduated curve. A sick kid on an airplane is bad enough, but a plague of locusts around age 12 would be downright regrettable. =)
In any event, I think that would have been a GREAT opportunity to intro the young’uns to the pilots, as ye reap what ye sow. Of course, pilots may be packing heat these days, so it’s probably for the best that you got while the getting was good!
The Pilots were trying to find a smoother ride. It just didn’t exist. They said over the PA that they informed that there was no good route to take and that we were going to hit the chop on the way in and they wish they could do something. So no fault of the pilots……And it’s not nice to fool with Mother Nature.
BBBBLLLAAAAAAAUUUUUUGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
Whew! That was one hëll of a reaction to a blog entry!
Been there, done that…You apparently had a better crowd on your plane. When that happened to me, thankfully I was near the front of the plane – still didn’t get anyone out of my way.
🙂
PAD: Thanks for coming to 2BCon. It was a better time than I’ve had at a number of recent cons, for a couple of reasons:
* Tiny size — there were no more than six of us gathered to talk with Tim “Zathras” Choate. The downside is that there were only five entrants in the masquerade (including my wife’s “Alice in Matrixland”)
* Enthusiastic guests — You and the other guests, including Tim Choate, Chase Masterson, Jeffrey Willerth, and The Great Luke Ski, spent time with the fans, in the game room, at the parties, etc.
* Music, Music Music — Three dementia acts (Luke Ski, Worm Quartet and Sudden Death), plus Ms. Masterson, provided music throughout the convention.
Again, many thanks for coming into town!
Joel
We were coming from Las Vegas to San Francisco and were about to land when the plane began to fall for about five seconds.
One of the flight attendants hit her head on the ceiling, and we were wondering what was going on in the cockpit.
Never was I ever happier to be on the ground in my life. 🙂
Steve Chung
My wife, our soon to be three-month-old daughter, and I will be flying out west next month. We’ve been a bit worried about her ears and I’m glad to see that sucking on a bottle will help. I pray for a smooth flight and no milk baths like the one you sufferd through PAD.
Hey PAD,
Every time we take a flight, my little girl always pukes. She’s 3 & still does it. What we do is when we get on the airplane we grab barf bags from our seats & kep them handy. If she even looks at me funny, the barf bag goes out.
We intend to fly over to Germany to visit my family next year which will be the first flight for our little girl.
Now we will definitely take precautions.
*fears having kiddies*
Hmmm… I’m surprised that I wasn’t on that flight. Not that I had any reason to be flying around that part of the country on that particular day, but I’m usually the victim, er… I mean passenger in front or next to the crying/barfing baby.
Sorry to hear about your tough flight. Better luck next time.
On the subject of baby barf: Mr. David, you have had several children, correct? Then you must have at some point experienced the dreaded projectile vomit of milk/forumla? I’ve got a seven month old and I’ve already experienced this phenomena 3 times. The first two times, I don’t know what happened, but it was in the middle of the night and he chugged his bottle alot faster than usual. Almost immediately after the bottle left his lips, it all shot back out with the force of a garden hose, arcing over his reclined body and hitting my leg and some pillows. I think in both those instances the entire eight ounces of formula came back. He soaked the couch, my leg, my shorts, my boxers, his blanket and a pillow and left a puddle on the floor. The third time ( and so far the last time in several months) I think the sweet potatos I fed him disagreed with him, and I saw not only the whole baby food jar of sweet potatos, but several ounces of cereal and eight ounces of formula (he had eaten all this over the course of an hour or two, the boy is an eating/growing machine) on the floor through the same garden hose method. Impressive. But ultimately disgusting.
Sorry for sharing the grossness.
Monkeys
Ah… the joys of fatherhood.
An adventure that I’m looking forward to undertaking, if I’m ever blessed enough to do so.
Anyway, don’t feel too bad Peter. You were right not to give the little one any unnecessary drugs prematurely.
Look at all the flack that has arisen about over medicating children. Pretictions are that at least a third of the children on ritalin and similar drugs may not have to go that route.
Only time and federal grant money will tell.
One of my more memorable flying experiences was returning from South Korea on a plane also transporting 25 Korean orphan infants to the U.S. for adoption. Sureal doesn’t begin to describe it.
On another topic, was Fred Phol at the con in Chicago? I remember seeing his name on some of the publicity material and haven’t heard much about him in recent years.
Steve Leavell
Yep. Fred was there with his wife Elizabeth and both looked in good health and were of fine spirits. I missed the panel that they did together on their travels, but I heard it was fancinating. They had to leave Saturday because they had family obligations Sunday.
Well that broght back memories…I still have a collection of once favorite shirts now reserved for days when I need to paint a barn or something, thanks to the indelible milk stains on the shoulder.
My first daughter barfed up so much of her fod that we never culd figire out how it was possible that she got any nutrition from it whatsoever. She just turned 13 though, so I guess some of it must have reached the small intestine.
And you had Dramamine but you didn’t use it??? Duuuuuuuuuude.
Glad you made it back, if a bit milk-stained. 🙂
As long as we’re on the subject of flying, though — anyone want to weigh in on the pros/cons of flying when seven months pregnant? There’s a family wedding on the east coast this June that Lisa and I both want to go to (the first cousin I remember being born … gah, I feel old), but it’s only about two months before Lisa’s due.
Obviously some of this would depend on her health at the time, but she’s been in great shape so far — I’m just looking for a general guess, ideally from those who’ve actually been there.
TWL
this is an intersting coincidince
as just yesterday my parents related to me a time when i or my twin
(my mom didnt remember which)
shall we say, exposed one of our elder brothers to the same phenomenon
sorry to hear it got so messy.
i also feel bad for those poor pilots,
think how awful they must feel !
To Tim Lynch:
Not female–never had to deal with a pregnant female–no plans to ever be involved with a pregnant female–but–
My understanding of pregnant women on airplanes usually involves 2 major factors–what her doctor says and what the airline policy is. Most doctors no longer automatically rule out a woman’s flying in her third trimester (in the past, women who flew that late in the pregnancy normally did so for some emergency), relying instead on the woman’s health and any past pregnancy (if she was in general good health till her 7th month with an earlier pregnancy, but unexpectedly delivered 3 or 4 weeks early, an airplane trip would likely be ruled out, except for some dire emergency). However, some airlines may be reluctant to allow a woman so far along to fly (checking the web, Frontier Airlines, as an example, requires that a woman in her third trimester “must consult [her] doctor and obtain a certificate dated within 72 hours of intended travel, indicating that the doctor has examined and found the passenger to be physically fit for air transportation”).
Tim: Obviously the final word on this has to come from your physician. My opinion? One month into the third trimester, she shouldn’t go. It has nothing to do with her health, the baby’s health, or effects that the plane flight could have on both of them. Instead it has everything to do with the simple fact that, should something happen–anything from unexpected bleeding to violent cramps to premature labor–you don’t want to be 3000 miles away from your doctor, hospital, and support system.
It’s just that simple.
PAD
Ok, I’m really sorry, but
“Being barfed on by your kid is one of those few life experiences where, no matter how many times it’s happened to you before, each time is like the first.”
was the funniest thing I’ve read in the year…. 🙂
not …….. good
had a similar experience myself (meaning, it was me that threw up in the plane) so can understood the other side of the coin,
My sister had a good way of making people laugh on a plane.
Flying over europe at about 30,000 feet and my sister turns around and says “dad, can i open the window ?”
I’m laughing heavily as only someone who has been barfed on by a child and dealt with a small child with motion sickness can. She hasn’t had the problem in a couple years, but my daughter used to get motion sick to the point of barfing once a month or so. We BOTH had spare outfits in the trunk, and there were always trash bags and paper towels a-plenty (though an “urp” rag or three are always good for cleaning random stuff off baby, parent, seats, etc., too). At that time I also kept dramamine around. If I had to fly with her, even now, I would undoubtedly bring the dramamine with me, and dose her up if it became bouncy.
As for travelling anyone hesistating to travel with baby, your kids are going to be something of a pain in the butt to travel with all their life. Travelling while they’re still small enough to not mind being strapped down for a few hours at a stretch is better than an antsy slightly older kid, and babies are generally easier to entertain.
To the person who asked, yes, projectile vomiting happens to most kids at some point. Sometimes it’s hard to tell why. As long as it’s not too frequent and they’re otherwise healthy, assume it was a trapped air bubble or something. Sometimes they’ll chug a bottle trying to setle the tummy that doesn’t feel right, and it backfires (so to speak).
As for the question about flying at 7 months, check with the airlines, check with the doctor, but don’t count on it. At 7 months pregnant, most women feel like a beached whale, not like going on trips. And I do second PAD’s answer that being so far away from your support network at that point is probably not a good idea. How she’s been feeling up to now (especially since the second trimester tends to be the most pleasant) may have little to do with what she feels like come June. Take it from someone who’s done the pregnancy thing, and play it safe. Being 2 months before due time, she might be willing to let you go alone, especially if you come back quickly.
To Tim Lynch, et. al.:
From what I have heard, NO airline will let ANY woman fly during her third trimester, REGARDLESS of the circumstances.
My 15 month old just upchucked on me last night after his “before bed” bottle. This makes about 50 times since he was born. And you’re right Peter…you never get used to it…
My wife and I ran around like chickens with our heads cut off — holding poorr Parker in front of us, while we scrambled to clean up the mess. It wasn’t until the floor and chair were finally somewhat saved when we realized…oh, maybe we should wipe Parkers face, since it’s covered in vomit. Heh. Sorry little buddy…we’re still learning.
Ken
Google is your friend:
http://airtravel.about.com/cs/safetysecurity/a/pregnantflyer_2.htm
http://www.babycenter.com/general/pregnancytravel/pregnancy/6976.html
http://www.delta.com/travel/special_services/special_needs/special_concerns/index.jsp
http://www.aa.com/apps/utility/siteSearch.jhtml;jsessionid=JLQDU025NOP03EAJJM1SM5MQBFFTGLTT?_DARGS=%2Fapps%2Fcommon%2Fincludes%2FutilityNav.jhtml.7
http://www.continental.com/travel/specialneeds/pregnancy/default.asp
Caroline picked up some kind of bug and has been running a fever. There has been periods of upchucking due to coughing which has all over the place. She is so confused as to what is happening to her little body and we can’t tell her in terms she would understand that she will get better.
I’ve noticed that several of these fake posters link directly to http://www.google.com through their names. Is there a way to auto-ban anyone who does that?