Hopefully my postings are remaining coherent. I’ve been working insane hours lately, and have more or less stopped sleeping. This is actually having a fairly positive effect on me: It means I’m up and around to take care of the baby down in my office so Kath can get some sleep (she’s so alert that if the baby so much as whimpers or cries for ten seconds, she wakes right up. At which point the baby drifts back off to sleep, leaving Kath’s slumber constantly interrupted.)

It also means that while working on the next Apropos novel, “Tong Lashing,” my mind becomes so demented that I actually come up with lines like this:

“We made our way much further north than even my peregrinations as the Peacelord had taken me. As a consequence, we were able to enter with impunity a particularly sizable port city, Port Debras, renowned for having the largest single dock in the entire land, known as the Grand Jetty.”

Two points for figuring this out without cracking a dictionary.

PAD

Number one: I was asked toward the end of the previous thread about a conversation I had with Bill Jemas a couple years ago about writing about Marvel in public.

Now I don’t ordinarily discuss private phone calls without the permission of the other party, but Joe is choosing to make it public, so…uncomfortably…okay.

I wrote a column that was, as I recall, a response to Bill’s initial “retailer IQ” comments. Bill called and we had a conversation that I would characterize as polite and even friendly (although lord knows how it would be described now.) Bill said that if I ever had any questions about things he’d said, I should feel free to call him and ask him to clarify it or discuss it further.

I told him that it was a very generous offer, but here was the problem: “But I Digress” isn’t a news column (for the most part). It’s an observational column that expresses opinions about things that are out there in the public forums. Yes, I could pick up the phone and say, “Bill, what the hëll did you mean by that.” But if I did that, then I’d be morally obligated to contact, say, Todd McFarlane, next time he said something stupid, and ask what the hëll *he* was talking about before I commented on it. Or what if Paul Levitz said something that was so dumb it prompted comment. Should I call Paul before ragging on DC? Bill laughed and said, “No! Absolutely not! Feel free to go after Paul whenever you want!” (Again, I emphasize this was SAID IN JEST, so it doesn’t turn into “Bill Jemas told Peter David to trash Paul Levitz whenever possible.”)

By contrast, I told him that if someone contacted me and said, “I heard Bill Jemas said such and such,” and I felt it was newsworthy, I would absolutely, one hundred percent call him and ask him what was up with it. And if that conversation convinced me it wasn’t newsworthy or dubious, I’d kill the story, because investigative journalism isn’t really BID’s thing. But public statements were fair game for public replies.

And he said he understood and was cool with that.

And I’ve stuck with that agreement and understanding.

So…that’s the first thing

Second thing: I’m starting to like Joe Q’s thinking. He put forward a fairly logical progression: If my contention is that Marvel is hiring Second Age, Inc., which in turn loans out my services, then the credit page on “Captain Marvel” can be changed to read “by Second Age, Inc.”

By all means.

I don’t *think* Marvel’s under any obligation to put my name anywhere on the book. Heck, before Stan Lee started slapping credits on the splash pages, most stories were fairly anonymous. (Indeed, if I’m recalling correctly, DC thought the practice so gauche that they did a parody version of Stan called “Stan Brag”…before they eventually started running credits themselves, of course.)

One would think Marvel would *want* my name on the book, for the purpose of selling copies. But if Marvel wants to substitute the credit line “by Second Age, Inc.,” by all means, if it’ll make ’em happy, feel free. Listing corporations as authors isn’t unusual. Heck, how many times do you see legal material at the end of a movie that says, “For purpose of copyright, XYZ Corporation is the author of this film.” My novels such as “Sir Apropos of Nothing” and “Knight Life” are copyright Second Age, Inc.

In fact…somehow it would be appropriate. My very first published work for Marvel was a one page Fumetti that appeared on the inside back cover of the Marvel Fumetti Book. I submitted the idea to the editors, and somehow my name got separated from the text (how, I’ve no clue.) So when editorial went around trying to find out who wrote it, it never occurred to them to check in the sales office, which is where I was working at the time. The result? My first published Marvel work ran with a question mark next to the “written by” credit. So if CM winds up being my last published work for them, which it indeed might, this would bring it full circle.

Hmm. Considering the number of people asking why I’m still working for Marvel, perhaps a return to the question mark would be in order.

PAD

Just out of curiosity, I went over earlier columns to see what policies about Marvel I might have gone to Joe about. It was kind of interesting, actually.

1) The dumping of the CCA. I publicly commended them.

2) Marvel’s Silent Month. While fans howled and dissed it, I was the first creator to publicly support it.

3) The announcement that Captain Marvel was in danger of cancellation. News to me, although it was discussed with fans (who suggested the price hike). Announced publicly, so I responded in kind. The result? The launching of two other books, one of which is doing pretty okay, and Captain Marvel has garnered a near 50% increase overall in sales. Joe said specifically that if I’m unhappy with something and can’t change it, I should leave. But I was unhappy with something and *did* get it changed, with Joe and Bill’s eventual enthusiastic help.

4) No reorder/No return policy. Said publicly I didn’t agree with it, but that was well over a year ago. More recently, have commented that it’s been working very well for Marvel. Began a retailer poll in direct response to Marvel brass attacking Heidi Macdonald, and in doing so, stated repeatedly that it was merely an attempt to see whose perception of retailer beliefs was more accurate.

5) Starting billjemas.com. Direct response to his attack on me in “Marville,” depicting me as an unemployed alcoholic. A closed door discussion would have helped that…how?

I’m missing something somewhere.

PAD

Why in the *world* is every critic and his brother whomping on “Treasure Planet?” Why are people acting like it’s the biggest snorer since “Black Cauldron?”

I took Ariel to see the one local showing of it available since it tanked at the box office, expecting to be bored out of mind. Not at all. Sumptuous to look at, enjoyable character designs, enthusiastic voice acting (Emma Thompson is a standout), and–as always–a story that spends most of its time trying to stay the hëll out of Long John Silver’s way since he dominates it as always (he’s a cyborg this time around.)

Is it the greatest animated film to come down the Disney pike in years? Lord, no. But the story’s pretty much there, and hey, people actually die along the way, so there’s serious stakes here. And for old time Legion of Superhero fans, there’s a morphing blob from the planet Proteus. God knows it’s better than “Atlantis” and, at the very least, it doesn’t remotely deserve the critical drubbing it’s received. At the most, it’s a fun way to past ninety minutes with your kid.

PAD

…and next to the term “Pyrrhic Victory,” you’ll see a picture of “Captain Marvel.”

The book appears to have a lock on winning the “U-Decide.” Except on his website, Joe Q. has effectively promised I’ll be fired if I ever write a negative word about Marvel ever again. Because it means I’m not on his team.

Me, I didn’t know Marvel still had a team. I know, because I used to play on it. Softball. I pitched. Sometimes I was catcher if my knees held up. And Volleyball. There used to be glorious volleyball games.

And we’d play against other publishers, including DC. And everyone got along. Because there were always public disagreements, jibes, challenges between companies at conventions, etc., but in the end, everyone understood: It’s comics, for God’s sake.

Those were great days.

I miss those days. Days of a sense of community.

Days of teams.

Ah well.

I don’t do well with threats.

PAD

Just came from Toys R Us, having purchased the gloriously huge talking Ent, Treebeard. And, just to be complete, I also picked up Merry and Pippin who are sized close to proportionately correct. Sure beats the heck out of my previous Ent action figure, which consisted of a carefully carved broccoli stalk.

By the way, I wonder: Would people start crabbing that “Two Towers” is “inaccessible.” After all, it makes zero effort to summarize the previous film. It just assumes you know what’s going on.

PAD

There’s a Bozo going around on my alt.fan board (and using the popular sock puppet “a friend of mine was wondering this” tactic to bring it up on Newsarama as well) who was pondering why my

titles, such as “Supergirl” and “Young Justice” get cancelled, and “Captain

Marvel” struggles. And when he posted it on my alt.fan board, he made sure to include the usual Usenet “bet you don’t have the balls to respond” nonsense, because, y’know, these guys always have to have a “muy macho” thing going. Because I take on Marvel execs to the point of probably being fired, but I’m going to be afraid of some Usenet numbnut.

Since this website represents my central response point, I’m posting my reply to the Bozo here as well as over on the alt.fan board. Two responses, actually: A short and a long.

Short answer:

Because, y’know, “Supergirl” never had a title canceled before I wrote her. Because, y’know, “Captain Marvel” has a long and proud history of sales success, as do all cosmically-related Marvel titles. Because, y’know, two of the three “Young Justice” mainstays, Impulse and Superboy, never had a title

canceled. When other books are canceled, oh well. When mine are canceled, something’s wrong somewhere. Bozo.

Long answer:

As all Gaul was divided into three, all comics are divided into three: Those that are halted by the creators, those that have already been canceled, and those that haven’t been canceled yet. The middle category is by far the largest. A look at the top 100 shows that, except for evergreens such as UXM,’Tec, and Action, no book is numbered over issue #100…which is 180 degrees from the market less than twenty years ago.

Readers don’t stay. Consequently, neither do creators. There’s no point in sticking with a title five, six, twelve years, because sooner or later, the audience will turn on you. Always. Without exception, and often without relation to the quality of the material being produced. That which they liked several years earlier, they now despise. Familiarity breeds contempt.

Always.

Creators are faced with two choices: Stay until that occurs, or leave.

So fans bìŧçh about creators who are transient in their loyalties, while at the same time take for granted, or even come to despise, those creators who stay.

Why are “my” books canceled? Putting aside that YJ was dumped to make way for a new cartoon series. Putting aside that if retailers had actually ordered sufficient copies of “Supergirl” to keep up with fan interest and demand, the series would have continued. Putting aside that many people *still* refuse to even sample “Captain Marvel” simply because they don’t like the character. Putting all that aside…

Why? Because I cared enough about the characters and readers to stick with series, year in, year out, getting the books out on time rather than months late.

Because I stayed.

Bozo.

PAD