Month: January 2014

Originally published February 11, 2000, in Comics Buyer’s Guide #1369

Several things this go-around:

I got breakfast from McDonald’s the other day. Kind of a spur of the moment thing. Ordered an egg sandwich and milk. I pulled around to the drive-in window and the teen standing in the window said, “Do you want the milk in a bag?”

“No,” I deadpanned, “I’d prefer it in a carton.”

“Okay,” he said tonelessly.

“Because, y’know, it’d probably soak right through the bag.”

“Okay.” Same night-of-the-living-dead voice.

“I was joking.”

“Okay. Here you go,” he said, never having registered anything I’d said. He handed me the bagged food. “Enjoy your meal.”

Never bother to kid around with McDonald’s drive-up window people at 7:15 in the morning. Complete waste of time.

Continue Reading “Herb Trimpe and a review of ZZZ” →

Originally published February 4, 2000, in Comics Buyer’s Guide #1368

The fan walked up to me in the hallway at the convention with a look of great urgency in her face. “Mr. David,” she said.

As usually happens when someone addresses me that way, I reflexively glanced behind me to see if my father was standing there. Belatedly realizing that she was talking to me, I said, “Yes?”

She shook my hand firmly and said, “I wanted to tell you… that conversation we had at this convention several years ago changed my life.”

Continue Reading “What Pros Owe Fans” →

Originally published January 28, 2000, in Comics Buyer’s Guide #1367

 

Ask any Jew what we do on Christmas Day. I mean, we don’t have family gatherings. We don’t run downstairs to look under the Christmas tree. We don’t go around singing carols, and you can’t count on a White Christmas for sledding or building snowmen. Of course, if you’re a Jewish doctor (and aren’t those rare as hen’s teeth?) you might well be on call.

But for the average Jew, what can we count on for the day where the country which mandates a separation between church and state shuts down offices (including all government ones) in order to celebrate the (most likely mythical) birthday of a noted religious figure?

Movies and Chinese food.

Continue Reading “Movie review: Galaxy Quest” →

Originally published January 21, 2000, in Comics Buyer’s Guide #1366

Concluding this year’s presentation of the Most Awards, those dubious recognitions of acts of merit, or lack of merit, or whatever I happen to think of.

Continue Reading “The Most Awards 1999, Part 2” →

Originally published January 14, 2000, in Comics Buyer’s Guide #1365

 

Yes, it’s that time again: The annual awarding of the “Most Awards,” named after the immortal Donny Most for no particular reason. In keeping with the pointlessness of naming them after the actor who portrayed Ralph on Happy Days, these awards are randomly given out to totally arbitrary categories in whatever way it suits the voting body (namely me). Which, when you get down to it, is pretty much how all awards are put together.

Continue Reading “The Most Awards 1999” →