Originally published June 18, 1999, in Comics Buyer’s Guide #1335
Would you like to go to your very own private screening of Trekkies?
It shouldn’t be all that difficult. All you had to do was go this past weekend, the very first weekend that The Phantom Menace was playing. Because while other studios did everything they could to clear any other film the hëll out of the way of Star Wars‘ path, Paramount Pictures—boldly going where no intelligent distribution would go—released a documentary called Trekkies the exact same weekend. They did so with virtually no promotion at all, on an extremely limited number of screens, with a film whose target audience was off seeing possibly the most anticipated movie of the century.
The words, “What were they thinking?” come to mind. Some fans are claiming that Paramount released it in direct conflict with Star Wars for the express purpose of burying it. I’m not sure why they would feel the need to do that; if they wanted to not release it, they always have the option of, well, not releasing it. But if they were trying to make sure that they could put it out without anyone watching it, then they made exactly the right move.
Kathleen and I went to catch it this weekend, having already done our Star Wars duty. I know any number of people in Trek fandom, not to mention a few of the actors and writers, and I was curious to see who—if any—was in the final product.
The theater was deserted. Absolutely deserted. Star Wars, running with greater frequency than my father’s nose during a high pollen count, was packing ’em in, and here was poor little Trekkies, with zero attendance. Well, zero plus two.
Watching the film in an otherwise deserted theater did give us some tremendous latitude. We could converse with each other during the film at normal voice levels since it was the equivalent of watching it at home on a reaaaaaally big screen. Occasionally we could talk back to the screen. And every time one particular individual came on the screen—a person who, while he was employed at Paramount, made the lives of every Trek author, including myself, a living hëll—I would unleash a bloodcurdling scream.
When I informed my 14-year-old, Gwen, that we were going to see a film called Trekkies, she asked, “What’s it about?” If you must likewise ask, then, while I’m also letting you know who’s buried in Grant’s Tomb, I will inform you that Trekkies is a documentary exec-produced by Denise Crosby (who also serves as on-camera interviewer) exploring the world of Star Trek fans.
As is usually the case where anyone or anything from the media is involved, the focus is not on the relatively normal people who come to conventions to hang, socialize, get some autographs, but otherwise don’t let Star Trek overly intrude into their lives. You know, the sort of people who constitute the vast majority of fans. There are some normally dressed people, convention-goers, appearing on screen from time to time, but they’re mostly limited to fast cuts in which they either comment about Trek or tell whereabouts they’re from (although I believe I did spot retailer John Barrett briefly).
No, the film places most of its focus on the fans who put the “fan” in “fanatic” (a word derivation the film mentions right up front). Like the dentist who completely redid his office into Starfleet headquarters, and not only wears a Trek uniform but insists that everyone on his staff do likewise. (One woman only did so after a year of resisting. Appropriately, however, her resistance was futile. She was assimilated.) And I have to admit, I would have run screaming from the theater if we’d spent one more minute with the woman in Arkansas who got tossed from the Whitewater trial—not because she insisted on wearing a Trek uniform, as seems to be the perception—but because she disobeyed a judge’s direct instructions not to talk to the press about her unusual attire. She’s held up as an example of dedication to the Star Trek ideals.
Me, I’m thinking, Hey, lady: You’re wearing a fleet uniform. In Starfleet, you have a duty to obey orders. The judge was your CO. He issued a direct order. You then flagrantly disobeyed it. That’s adhering to ideals? Plus her claims that she wore the uniform to work every day turned out to be incorrect, since she’s shown at her place of business dressed normally, albeit with pins and accessories.
This is a documentary that, had it been made by the producers of The Daily Show, could have been the most unbelievably scathing commentary on fan mentality of all time. It would have made William Shatner (who is notable in his absence from most of the film, with only Patrick Stewart less visible) and the classic “Get a Life” sketch seem like an ode of joy to Trekdom in comparison. But Crosby walks a fine line. Maybe she’s trying to remain journalistically impartial. Or it may be that she simply doesn’t want to get the fans angry at her, and who could blame her? Personal appearances can be quite lucrative, and actresses can be making a very healthy living on the convention circuit at a point in their career when casting agents are tossing out their phone numbers. So she gives no real personal commentary or observations, nor does she ever look into the camera in a “Can you believe this stuff?” way.
There are points where you almost wish she would, because there were times during the unspooling of the film where I was just squirming in my seat. Did the people being interviewed know how they were coming across? Did they care? The happy Trek family where mom, dad and the two kids are shown all marching around in their uniforms—are the parents at all aware that when these kids become teenagers, they’re going to be shouting, “I hate Star Trek! I hate these stupid uniforms! I hate you! Why can’t we be normal?”
There’s one story recounted by a Trek convention organizer about a half-filled glass of water left on a podium at a convention by John (“Q”) de Lancie, who had been ailing with some sort of nasty bronchial infection. During an auction, the organizer jokingly held up the glass of water and offered it for bid. Before he knew it, it had been purchased for sixty bucks, and the lucky winner ran up to the front of the room, grabbed the glass, downed the remainder of the water that the infected actor had been drinking, and shouted, “I’ve got the Q virus!” Kiddo, wherever you are, you’ve got bigger problems than that, I can assure you.
But Trekkies tries to run the gamut. Just when you think that the film can’t creep you out any more than it already has, interviewees start to describe all the positive benefits that Trek has had on their lives. People whose careers were shaped by the original series, in professions ranging from aerospace to show business. (Whoopie Goldberg told Nichelle Nichols that it was watching Uhura on the original series that made her realize a black woman could grow up to be something other than a maid. Yeah, like a glorified telephone operator, which is what Uhura essentially was. But, hey, if that was what inspired Whoopie to her career, one can’t argue with results.)
There are points where you actually find yourself saying, “Awww, that’s nice.”
And then, of course, there’s the politely bemused reactions of the actors whose careers and lives have been sent off in some very odd directions thanks to Trek. Without question the best interview subject is Brent Spiner, who at one point is holding up a fan-rendered portrait depicting a very buff, very muscular and very nude Data and Tasha Yar going at it. With a straight face, Spiner tells interviewer Crosby, “What’s really amazing is that not only did the artist get my body exactly right, but, you know, your naked body is also perfectly depicted, right down to the—” Then he suddenly stops, looks into the camera in “chagrin” and says, “Are… are we still filming?”
Frankly, by the end of the film, you don’t know whether to laugh or cry. Fortunately the film makers take the decision out of your hands since, over the closing credits there is a series of comedians, each one uproariously talking about Star Trek. One of them makes the point that fans of sports teams think nothing of wearing team jerseys wherever they go, and that practice is really no different than Trek fans dressing up to feel a part of their own “team.” That’s true enough as far as it goes. But a guy wearing a baseball shirt with “Sosa” on the back obviously isn’t trying to be Sammy Sosa. A guy in full Klingon garb speaking a language that sounds like a blend of gargling, a Torah reading, and a bout of Turrets is clearly in a whole ‘nother realm.
Then again, I remember the convention I attended some years back when the hotel double booked us with the Shriners. There’s nothing like having a passel of senior citizens wearing fezzes and green or red blazers commenting on the oddly dressed weirdos in the hotel.
In the end, no conclusion is drawn other than that Trek has had a tremendous impact on a lot of people, and no one seems to have any real idea as to why that is. However, if fans were looking for a movie that was somehow going to “legitimize” them in the public eye, this film isn’t it. Hardcore fans will nod and smile and be pleased at the presentation, but anyone outside of that circle is going to be left shaking their heads.
Still, it’s not as if they’re alone. Because as noted, just outside the theater, people dressed like Darth Maul were wandering around, spinning their double-sided plastic lightsabers. Granted, they love Star Wars, just as Trek fans love Star Trek and Babylon 5 fans love B5. But to quote, of all people, Captain Kirk, “Too much of anything… even love… isn’t necessarily a good thing.”
And what’s really hilarious is that oftentimes fans of one can’t stand fans of the other. Endless debates of “Star Wars vs. Star Trek,” “Star Trek versus Babylon 5,” etc., rage on. Actually, what do you call fans of Star Wars and B5? “Warries?” “Fivers?” (They could outlaw Star Wars fans in Australia, proclaiming, “No Warries, mate.”)
Here’s an interesting question I toss out at you folks. A very informal survey, if you will, and I would like to hear back. Two questions:
1) Do you consider yourself a Trekkie, Warrie or Fiver, and why?
2) Which one of the three types of fans mentioned above would you least want to be stuck in an elevator with, and why?
Send your responses to “No Warries, Mate,” c/o Second Age, Inc., PO Box 239, Bayport, NY 11705.
• 
All right, I start :
1) I couldn’t be a Fiver because I didn’t have the channels on which B5 ran in France. I enjoyed Star Wars when it came out. Same with Star Trek, although I didn’t follow all the episodes of the five series. But right now, I’m a Whovian (both “classic” and “new” series).
2) Fiver. Given that I have no idea what the series is about, because I haven’t seen it, I wouldn’t understand what the smeg s/he would be talking about.
1) I don’t think I’m obsessive enough to be a Trekkie — I can’t name every episode, actor, or bit of trivia about STAR TREK — but that’s my closest fandom.
2) I’d hate to be stuck with a Fiver because I’d probably have to listen to them complain about how unappreciated B5 was and how it’s so much better than ST and SW and yadda yadda yadda…
1. Probably more of a Trekkie than a Warsie, but it’s close.
2. Fiver, because I’ve never seen it and my eyes would probably glaze over after about thirty seconds, the way they did back in high school when a guy tried to explain Dragonball Z to me.
Denise Crosby came to Brazil for a special showing of “Trekkies” (it wasnt shown in regular theaters here). I only went because I got in for free, thanks to being friends with some trekkers.
She talking about the movie and then left the building when the lights came down. That was a smart move since she wouldn’t have been pleased with the audience’s reactions.
Saw Trekkies with my brother in law. We had the place to ourselves. We didn’t know whether to be amused or appalled. Pretty much the same reaction we had to The Phantom Menace, actually.
Most Aussies don’t say “no Warries, Mate” – instead we are known for saying “no Wuckas” (short for “no wuckin’ furries” (not as in things that are furry; “furries” rhymes with “curries”)
1. Babyler (pronounced bab bil er) is my favorite version of B5 fan names. Interesting that those who would least want to be in an elevator with a Babyler are those who haven’t even seen it, so they know that there is this great series out there, but have made a conscious decision not to experience it.
2. Wouldn’t matter to me, as I can prattle on with the Trekkies and Warries as a native son, as well as any Whovians out there!
The “Commander” from the Whitewater jury pool absolutely infuriated me. When she spoke of her fictional rank as if it were the equivalent of actual military service, I wanted to either punch her, or kidnap her and put her through basic training so she can see how those uniforms are EARNED rather than handed out to the most enthusiastic member of the pretendy-times spaceship fan club.
THANK YOU. 🙂
While this is not a direct answer to the question, I’d like to bring up another fandom that almost certainly would be mentioned in this article if it had been written more recently:
Browncoats.
For those not in the know, Browncoats are the devotees of Joss Whedon’s “Firefly” which was, essentially, live-action anime that lasted 0.5 seasons on network TV. They take their name from the defeated rebel scum whose terrorist remnants form the central cast of characters. Their coats aren’t even necessarily brown.
I think they should be a fourth option because Browncoats are the Cubs fans of the Nerdverse. They are the ones who love an underdog, and defy the MAN even with their fan-aticism. As Lao Tzu says: “Everyone on earth knowing that beauty is beautiful makes ugliness.”
To answer the questions directly:
1)Of the three, Trekkie. Trek is what I grew up with and memorized and pretended to be as a child. I am the adult that arises after many Lego Enterprises. And Peter David books.
2)I would have to say that all depends on the level of tolerance the fan in question has with ignorance. I would say that as a general rule, obscure, off-beat fandoms tend to be more accepting of polite inquiry, and do not assume a vast, pre-existing knowledge base of esoterica. (I considered B5 unwatchable– a sort of Red Dwarf that took itself seriously. But hey, maybe the right fan could get me interested.)
All told, the act of becoming a fan, in and of itself, is a way of simplifying the world into an obsession. Something like a religion that does not make empirical truth claims. This is both its strength and its weakness, and it guarantees you’re going to get some nuts.
Peter David: No, the film places most of its focus on the fans who put the “fan” in “fanatic” (a word derivation the film mentions right up front).
Luigi Novi: Which interestingly, Seven of Nine notes to Janeway after the Doctor has developed a rabid following among the Qomar in Virtuoso(VOY)
Peter David: Like the dentist who completely redid his office into Starfleet headquarters, and not only wears a Trek uniform but insists that everyone on his staff do likewise.
Luigi Novi: Now see, I thought that was an example of one of more positive fans, because he used Trek a normally unpleasant activity pleasant for the kids.
This is in stark contrast to the former Whitewater juror who not only wears a Starfleet uniform and has a toy tricorder on her belt, but expects others to call her “Commander”. She epitomizes the word “loser”.
Peter David: 1) Do you consider yourself a Trekkie, Warrie or Fiver, and why?
Luigi Novi: Mostly a Trekkie, but that doesn’t preclude a love of the other two. I enjoyed Star Wars as a kid, and hope to enjoy J.J. Abrams’ sequels when they come out. I enjoyed the first two seasons of B5 when I caught them on Hulu, and hope in the future to get to see the rest of the seasons.
Peter David: 2) Which one of the three types of fans mentioned above would you least want to be stuck in an elevator with, and why?
Luigi Novi: The type who aren’t capable of rational, intelligent, honest discussion, which of course, is not determined by which of those three franchises they identify with more, since there are decent folk and áššhølëš among all three. Diversity in large groups, after all.
Considering the limited release the film got (in 1999 Paramount may have expected to make most of their money off dvd sales, which were just taking off and making lots of money 14 years ago) I was surprised when they did a sequel, Trekkies 2. I believe I saw it on HBO and to be different from the first film, it dealt with Trek fans and conventions in Europe. About half way through the film it dawned on me that in European fandom, there were no overweight fans. Whether that’s a fact or a decision made by the director in the editing room, I don’t know. But even the crowd scenes of European SF conventions did not have any overweight people in them. The fans also weren’t as extreme, but then Star Trek has never been as big outside the US as it is here.
1) Trekkie. When I was a kid I insisted in calling myself a “Trekker”, thinking it somehow sounded less silly.
2) Fiver. I try to “live and let live” with other types of fans, but I swear all these people want to talk about is how Deep Space Nine was stolen from Bab5, and how DS9 is the inferior show. Let it go, people! Actually, the only type of fan I actively avoid are the Whedonites.
I actually love both of these movies, and we watch them to get psyched for upcoming cons. The enthusiasm these people have is contagious. Sure, these are all extreme examples, but they’re really not much crazier than the cosplayers, fan fiction writers, and obsessive documenters you’ll find all over fandom. To quote George Romero; “We are them and they are us.”
1. I guess all three to some extend. I don’t care which one is “better”. What draw me to these franchises beyond enjoying the original source material is the complex fictional universes. I do not collect toys or dress up or anything but I did read-and still have-a lot of books and comics and even source-books/in-universe encyclopedias for all three. I probably forgot more about these 3 franchises than most people will ever learn. I haven’t seen all TREK episodes and there is only a few episodes/movies I have seen more than once. B5 I saw it all.
2. Anyone that would treat it as more than a source of entertainment.
I appreciate all three for what they are.
TREK for some solid sf stories, at least early on.
SW for the rousing science fantasy/space opera it is and never claimed to be anything else.
B5 just a solid tale populated by fascinating characters.
While we’re at it …
STARGATE: SG-1 for taking an interesting (however improbable) concept and taking it (and its fun characters) where TREK would never dare go. Blame the studio, but in the century of Starfleet history seen from the original through late movies (not the Abrams ones, mind you) their tech has not really changed from warp drive/phasers/transporters throughout, though there were some improvements to that tech, in spite of all the alien encounters and trade deals. In ten years, the SG crew went from ground pounders trying to figure out how to use the gate, to having acquired the knowledge to design and build their own inter-galactic starships. Now that was fun to follow.
1) Original Series Trekkie, and Star Wars fan. Whovian completes the trilogy for my family and I. B5 started after I had no room left in my head for new fictional universes.
2) Defintiely Next Generation Trekkers…based only on a single personal experience. I was helping a friend set up a party at a con. It was on a floor in the low teens, far higher than I wanted to use the stairs to access. However, I couldn’t use the elevator, because a group of people in Next Gen costumes were preventing it from moving by jumping in and out of it, using it to provide cover while firing phasers at soem invisible foe.
Star Trek-Yes, I’m a Trekker.
Star Wars-Yes, I’m a casual fan.
Babylon 5-No, I’ve tried to get into it but I can’t.
Stargate-I’ve seen the orginal movie with Kurt Russell and thought it was OK, but nothing special. I’ve tried to watch Sg-1 but like B5 I can’t get into it.
Firefly/Serenity-Yes, I’m a Browncoat, but I don’t think it’s returning.
Farscape-Yes, I’m a Scaper.
Battlestar Galactica-Yes, I’m a fan of both the orginal series and the re-imagined series and Caprica.
Dr. Who-I’m a casual fan.
Transformers-Yes, I’m a HUGE Transfan and have been most of my life. The Transformers have gotten me into so many hobbies: comics, movies, anime, music, the internet, and all of the other sci-fi shows I’m into. Even my passion for pro-wrestling has a weird connection to Transformers.
Classic Original series fan who would not hesitate to say to J.J. Abrams, “You’ve done the Enterprise up a bit… don’t like it!” 🙂
As flawed as the Trekkies documentary may have been, it also included (if I recall correctly) an interview with James “Scotty” Doohan where he talks about how he wound up helping a depressed and suicidal fan. And if you can listen to that story without tearing up at least a little bit, then you have no soul.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vsSdLD_YodQ