Nearly three weeks ago, for no discernible reason, I started developing pain in my right hip. I was fine once I started walking or if I was sitting or lying down; but the transition from sitting to standing was agonizing. (And if that doesn’t seem a problem, then keep track of the number of times you go from sitting to standing and vice versa in the course of a day). They took X-rays and found nothing relevant to hip pain. So they put me on some heavy-duty pain killers and recommended, just as a precaution, that I see an orthopedist.
By the time I saw the orthopedist, it had gotten worse. Walking no longer kick started my hip; now I couldn’t walk without a cane (although to assuage my new found sense of vulnerability, I was using my sword cane.) The orthopedist believed that it could be a pinched nerve and put me on a prescription of pregnazone, but also slated me for an MRI. And I was on the clock, because this was happening on Wednesday and I was slated to get on an airplane the following Monday for a business trip.
The MRI was barely 24 hours later. By that point, it had spread to both my hips and my thighs down to my knees (although not into them, thankfully). I couldn’t believe how fast I was degenerating. I was now in pain 24/7. There was no comfortable position for me; at most, I could become so exhausted that I would pass out for an hour here or there before the pain awoke me. That was my equivalent of sleep.
They got back the MRI results and that’s when it pretty much went right off the rails.
I had somehow managed to herniate or rupture a disc in my lower back. Apparently it was something that had built up over time. There were bone fragments in there and a sac of fluid had built up,and all the escalating pressure was destroying me from the waist down.
Some doctors in this situation recommend a combination of waiting to see if the fluid reabsorbs and “pain management” (if you can call writhing and screaming “Kill me!” managing things). Even if I could have withstood it, I doubted my family could have. The pregnazone had done nothing. Vicodin had had no impact. They’d upgraded me to a morphine derivative, which had no affect on the pain but just simply caused me to stop caring for a few hours. It also prompted me to call Harlan at 11 o’clock at night for no reason and then spend most of the conversation laughing into the receiver. My next planned call, as much as I’m able to remember, was to call my ex-wife and start blowing raspberries at her except Kathleen took away my phone privileges.
But the doctor who I met with said a course of surgery would pretty much fix it instantly. He could drain the fluid and remove the bone fragments. This presented a time line that meant I would not have to cancel my plans for Shore Leave and San Diego. Plus, y’know…instant relief. This had only been going on for two weeks, and yet I already could not recall a time when I hadn’t been in pain. It had taken over my family, my life. Anything I wanted to do, from sitting and reading to my youngest to earning a living to finding a way to turn my body so I could kiss my wife, pain was omnipresent, like a demanding child with insatiable appetite for attention.
The operation, a discectomy (or, more accurately a fragmentectomy) was described as having a history of minimal risk and high effectiveness. Plus how could you not want to use a Doctor named Faust? I kid you not. My spine surgeon was Doctor Faust. Tragically, his first name was not Felix, nor did he have a nurse named Marlowe. But still…Doctor Faust. How can you pass that up?
I was rapidly reaching a point where I was going to be bed-ridden, with a wheel chair necessary if I wanted to leave the house. So they steamrolled the procedure through and slated it for last Friday at a hospital in Nassau County. We were there at 6:15 AM and they had me on the table by 7:45. Kathleen was in the family waiting room and she wound up conversing with a young guy who was a writer on “Letterman” and was waiting to hear about, I think, his sister. I don’t know what the details of her operation were, but I understand they were considerably more hazardous than mine. On the off chance that he’s reading this, I hope he’ll drop me a note at padguy@aol.com and let us know how it went.
The doctor had told us the procedure would take an hour to an hour and a half. So by the time three hours rolled around, Kathleen was going out of her mind, and then Doctor Faust appeared, although not in a burst of smoke with a cape, tragically enough. He told her what I’ll now tell you: The MRI had not revealed how extensive the damage was. He had hoped there would be one single bond fragment; instead there were numerous, smaller fragments, and it had taken them a long while to make sure that all of them were out. That’s why the operation had gone twice as long.
I was checked out of the hospital some hours later and sent home with a prescription of percoset. The prescription said to take one every four hours.
By late Friday night, the last of the anesthesia had worn off, and I was plunged into hëll.
The good news is that the pain was gone from my hips. I could sense it. But it was more than compensated for by the normal post op pain that was radiating from my back and hammering through my central nervous system. I was beyond agony. This last the previous couple of week’s pain in the dust. After over an hour of excruciating experimentation, I found a way to lie horizontally across the bed that afforded some minimal rest. I woke up after sporadic sleep and was no better. Returning to the hospital was not an option; there was no way I could get down the stairs. Every single movement was laced with pain. The doctor’s office assured me that the first 24 hours would be the worst and it would get better after that.
By Monday it wasn’t better. The doctor’s office said, “Let’s review the medication. You’re taking two Percoset every four hours…”
I said, “Wait. Stop. I’m taking one.”
They said, “You’re supposed to be taking two.”
I said, “The label says one.”
“Well, we have in our notes that you should be taking two. Also in between dosages, take two Advil for additional relief.”
I doubled my dosage immediately and started taking the Advil as well. Within six hours, the pain had dropped to what I would describe as discomfort. By evening, I was actually able to sleep for hours at a stretch. Today is the first day that I’ve felt well enough to start working, and this entry is a warm-up for that. My wife and children are no longer being serenaded by howls of agony. I’m starting to feel human again. I’m catching up with DVD sets that I’ve never had a chance to watch before–currently I’m in the fourth season of “How I Met Your Mother” which, if you’re not watching, you really should be.
I might still be moving a bit slower at Shore Leave than I’m used to, but at least I’ll be there. And I should be fully functional in time for San Diego. So I’ll see you there.
And if you start developing hip pain, don’t try to be tough about it. Seek medical consultation immediately and, if your condition doesn’t respond to medication, don’t be afraid to let people know about that. Get the help you need.
PAD
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Peter,
Wishing you a swift recovery.
Glad you’re feeling better, PAD. Between your inner strength, your medical careand your strong family, this will be a distant memory before you know it.
I don’t know if I have that much inner strength. I mean, I didn’t kill myself rather than live with it, but that’s setting the bar pretty low.
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PAD
Given the vast amounts of pain you described, it’s hard to say anything like “congrats” given what you’ve been through — but it’s very good that the worst is past, the recovery process is (now) underway, and nothing either life-threatening or permanent happened. Feel substantially better soon!
(As an aside, what’s your sword-cane like? I bought one off of eBay, and while the cane part works fine, the “sword” looks like a long nail file — and matches it for sharpness. But while it’s useless for self-defense (I suspect an actual nail file would be more dangerous), it’s a great prop for CALL OF CTHULHU and won’t get me arrested for carrying a concealed weapon.)
I bought it at a RenFair. The sword isn’t full length, but it’s not bad: The blade runs from my elbow to the tip of my little finger, and one of the sides is extremely sharp. I mean, if I’m surrounded by four heavily armed guys with broad swords, I’m toast. But if some mugger sees me as easy pickings because I’m a limping guy with a cane, I can do some serious damage before he realizes what happened.
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PAD
So much for my plans to challenge you to a duel at the next I-CON. “En garde!” [PAD slices through my “sword” with one stroke”] “Run away!”
If it helps, this:
“It also prompted me to call Harlan at 11 o’clock at night for no reason and then spend most of the conversation laughing into the receiver.”
made me laugh to hard it made all your pain worthwhile. 🙂
Glad you are feeling better.
Wow. I won’t whine about the kidney stone I passed once anymore! Glad to hear you’re feeling better, and will heed your words of caution.
So, do you ever pull the sword cane out and call anyone a “missing link”?
Sounds a lot like Kate’s herniated disk(s) – though hers were in the neck.
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Did they use an endoscopic procedure, or more conventional procedures?
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The reason Kate chose the endoscopic procedure is that the standard procedure for cervical herniated disks is to literally cut your throat, move your gullet and windpipe out of the way, and…
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And you apparently take weeks (or even months) to recover to the point of being normally functional, unlike the days it took in her case. (Though “full recovery” was more like a month or so, full functionality was a couple days.)
As someone who has had quite serious health problems themselves over the last 12 months I want to wish you a sincere and speedy recovery. When you really start to improve, it’s amazing how quickly severe ill health can become a distant memory.
On a less sombre note, my father was once operated on by a surgeon named “Mr Gory!” Not quite Doctor Faust….but still!
PAD,
Do you have any idea how you ruptured a disc? I presume you still bowl and I remember a couple of years ago you started lifting weights and lost quite a few pounds. Is that still your routine?
Glad things worked out well.
Do you have any idea how you ruptured the disc?
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Thwarting a sumo wrestler’s attempt to rob a local 7-11.
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PAD
So you’re Kick-Úš? (Okay, so it wasn’t a sumo wrestler in the movie, but still…)
Don’t beat yourself up too much, Peter. Extreme pain has made wussies out of better men than both of us.
Oh, I don’t need all that much pain to be a wuss. What I’m beating myself up over is that it must have scared the hëll out of my kids and made Kathleen feel helpless.
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PAD
Yowza. I’m very glad to read that you’re doing better. Toward the end, I had the horrible feeling the story I was reading would not have a happy ending. I was envisioning results that were much worse. You managed to build up a fair amount of suspense in me. So…glad that things seem to be improving.
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Final note: if I had been in your position when I found out about the pain med prescription getting mucked up, it would have been a good thing that I wasn’t in the shape to do anything violent. That is doubleplus uncool. I’ve never had to deal with sustained pain that’s worse than a toothache, and I know how that can prey on your mind. My heart goes out to you.
I was once treated by Dr. Strange (no surgery, though.) He was the only doctor to figure out what was wrong with me after I’d spent two months going from one doctor to another. He saved my life. I’m disappointed that he didn’t use the Eye of Agomotto to diagnose me.
Feel for you man, similar thing happened to me about seven years ago.
What you said about the pill not helping the pain but making you not care about anything brought back some bad memories.
It get better hang in there
I’m terribly sorry that you had to go through that but I’m sure glad you’re well on the road to recovery.
Tell the truth, Peter. That Kathleen is just an ANIMAL, and she wore you out!
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Okay, seriously, I hope you’re feeling better, Peter. Having recently had a bout with excruciating back pain that forced me to take Percoset myself (and yeah, it was the getting up from a seated or prone position that was the worst), I can sympathize. 🙂
Oh jeeze, that was an excrciating read…I can only imagine what it was like to live it.
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Please take it easy, don’t be in a rush to get back to normal.
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By any chance, while you were on the morphine, did you have a hand in the new Wonder Woman design?
That sounds awful. I’m glad you’re getting better and I hope all the bad parts are over now.
Feel better soon!
Releived (though not nearly as much as you) to hear the healing is progressing apace. But did the doctors give any indication there might be any reccurence?
PAD,
You have my sympathy. I’ve lived with chronic pain since I was 10 and it got worse after destroying the rotator cuffs in both shoulders a few years ago. Bottom line, get any sleep that you can and take the pain killers as required. Percocet is a powerful drug and has the unfortunate side effect of many opiates which is constipation. This too can be conquered. Hang in there man. You are lucky to have Kath helping you with this. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Dennis
You’re the one who has my sympathies, Dennis. With any luck, I’m just passing through Paintown. But you’ve got a permanent time share? That sucks.
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PAD
Glad you’re feeling better, Peter. See you at Shore Leave.
I hope you feel better soon! My wife and I had a laugh when I noticed the guy treating me in the ER recently was named “Dr. Pain.”
My God, I wonder if it was the same guy. I was in a hospital in, I think, New Jersey some years ago, and I hear them paging “Doctor Pain” over the hospital’s PA system.
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PAD
This guy was in Florida so probably not the same. Maybe if you last name is Pain you feel you have to make up for it? “Dr Guilt, please report to the ER… Dr Guilt…”
PAD, glad you’ll be getting better cause pain just sucks (eloquent ain’t I.)The only emergency surgery I have had was preformed by a Dr. Osam pronounced Awesome. In the end I had to agree with his name.
SF writer Alan Nourse was an MD, and his last name is pronounced “Nurse”. He did his residency at the same time and in the same hospital as a doctor named “Dockter”.
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Apparently the PA announcements were sometimes almost as surreal as “Dr Howard, Doctor Fine, Doctor Howard…”
Peter David: I was in a hospital in, I think, New Jersey…
Luigi Novi: Wow, for you, that’s like adding injury to injury! 🙂
In the TNG timeline, as I understand it, Beverly Howard finished medical school before she married Jack Crusher and took his surname.
I’ve no idea why we didn’t hear as a background page at least once, “Calling Dr. Howard, Dr. Crusher, Dr. Howard!”
I’m glad your trip through the Dante’s 9 Circles of Hëll has mostly concluded.
Here’s to your full recovery!
Good story. The parts concerning Dr. Faust (that is indeed too awesome for words) made me laugh. I’m glad you’re starting to feel better.
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I’ve heard so many “How I Met Your Mother” recommendations that I feel like I really should be watching it, but I’d want to start from the beginning and I have a long list of TV show DVDs to watch (I’m currently watching Dead Like Me and loving it). Are comparisons to Friends accurate? ‘Cause I was quite a big fan of that show.
I’m glad to know you’re on the mend. And I’m sure Harlan will find a way to get back at you.
Oh, that is SO not Harlan’s style. Basically he knew that my mind–such as it was–was in such a happy place that my instinct was to call and share my mood with my friend. “I feel happy! Who should I call when I feel this happy? Harlan and Susan! They’ve had their share of troubles, and I can share my happiness!” He seemed more entertained by it than anything (“Peter? Are you doped up?”) and it should be noted that since then he or Susan have called literally every day to check up on me.
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PAD
And THAT’S why I like Harlan. I’ve always admired his loyalty to his friends.
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A speedy recovery to you!
It sounds as though the whole thing was horrible, and it makes Peter David look incredibly tough to go through all of that. I’m glad he’s out of the woods, and I’m curious as to how this event will show up in his writings. (Wait a minute, wounded, difficulty walking, a cane weapon, Peter has become Sir Apropos! Finally, a new novel!)
I feel your pain. My job is tough on my back but for the past ten years I have been able to deal with it. A few weeks ago I stated getting a pain in the hip that shot down my leg. I went to a chiropractor and that helped so I stopped going and now I am in worse pain then before. I was thinking that treating the pain had made it worse and that I should let it work itself out but, after reading your story I’m not so sure.
My wife has an optometrist named Dr. Pin, that always creeps me out.
Get well.
Sorry to hear that you went through that. Two weeks might not seem long, but I’m sure felt like a lifetime.
When you get through this completely, to help prevent future back problems, I recommend yoga.
Glad to hear you’re on the mend. Remember to take it easy, especially in San Diego, where it’s easy to do a lot of walking without realizing it (“What, I’m still in the convention center…I couldn’t have gone _that_ far…”)
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Wish I was going to be there in San Diego to see how you’re doing in person, but can’t afford it this year (especially now that I live in Oregon as opposed to Southern CA). First time in a decade I won’t get to say in person how much I enjoy your work, so I’ll take this opportunity here…
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I really enjoy your work. Do you mind signing this? (Oops. Habit.)
Sympathies. Having had kidney stones and having been underdosed for them as well, high end pain just ain’t fun.
And no, we won’t go into details on my surgery.
That experience sounds just brutal. My sympathies to you and your family. I’m glad that you were able to get through it successfully, and wish you all the best.
So glad to read that you’re past the surgery, home again, writing again and slowly back on the road to a full recovery. Hang in there.
So glad you’re feeling better.
Aw JEEZ, Pete. 🙁 So glad the operation went successfully, but the thought of you having to go through that is awful. You’re in my thoughts and I wish you well.
So relieved to hear you’re on the road to recovery. My hip started hurting just reading this.
I’m glad that things are going better and that you’re healing. I wish you the best and hope you get well (heal up?) soon.
Glad to hear you’re on the mend, and I’m looking forward to seeing you at Shore Leave. Take care of yourself, sir!
Get better faster — and enjoy those DVDs! 😀
Wildcat
I’m so sorry you went through all this, and happy you’re on the mend.
“This had only been going on for two weeks, and yet I already could not recall a time when I hadn’t been in pain.”
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I hear you man. Two years ago I hurt my back and I felt like that in less time than that. Horrible.
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The Doctor gave me either Percoset or Vicodin I do not remember anymore. He told me to take two at a time and they send me crawling to the toilet to vomit. I didn’t feel pain anymore but my head and stomach had me calling for my mommy. I only weight 130 lb so that may have something to do with that. Did you experience any side effects from the pain medication?
Aside from the aforementioned loopiness, no, I had no side effects. I made sure always to eating a piece of bread or a glass of milk or both (to start) because the heavy-duty pain killers can do a number on your stomach if you don’t have something in there to coat it.
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PAD
I’m glad to hear you are up and around.
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When I had surgery a few years ago, the doc put me on Percoset. He told me to take 4 a day, but the bottle from the pharmacy said 2 a day. My insurance decided that 4 was too many, but strangely gave me the same number of pills.
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When I had a flare up of pain a little over a month later, he let me switch from taking one every 6 hours to taking one every 8 hours, but two before bed to help me sleep.
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With the amount of pain you are in, you might want to ask if Kathleen can come into the office with you when you go in for follow ups. That way she can get the doctor’s verbal recommendation just in case it is different from what gets printed on the bottle.
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I hope you have a speedy and complete recovery.
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Theno
Glad you are doing better and that your doctors did the job thus far.
And all the best to your family, for coping with you.
Oh, man. That sounds like a nice comfy journey through hëll. I’m very glad that it seems to be heading towards a happy resolution. Hang in there. (And major, MAJOR kudos to Kath for keeping her head on straight through all of this!)
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Thenodrin’s advice a few posts above is really good; having a second person there to hear what the doctor says is a great idea. My dad’s heading for surgery shortly, and either my brother or I have been with him for pretty much every significant doctor visit.
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And as long as we’re on doctors with funny names … while my urologist has a normal enough name, two other urologists in the practice are named, I kid you not, Dr. Seaman and Dr. Yanke. One can only imagine the razzing they must get…
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TWL
Yeah, when i had arthroscopic surgery on my knee five years ago, i apparently misheard what the doctor said and went through a couple days of unnecessary pain.
Back when St. Elsewhere was still on the air, I happened to be in the gift shop at St. Louis University Hospital when a page came over the p.a. system for a Dr. Westfall. I whirled around in surprise and the clerk behind the counter, noting my reaction, said “Oh, that happens all the time.”
There was a story in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch some years ago about Norman Lloyd which quoted him as saying he had been vacationing in Beijing at the same time as a group of western physicians were touring China. He got into a hotel elevator and another occidental man looked at him oddly and said “Forgive me, you look familiar, so I presume we’ve met but I can’t remember your name.” Without missing a beat, Lloyd shook his hand and said “I’m Dr. Auschlander,” and they talked medicine until they reached the lower destination floor.
You have my sincerest sympathies. I went through this myself, twice now. I knew by the end of your first paragraph what happened to you. Mine wasn’t as severe as yours, so I was eventually able to take steriod shots in my spine and alleviate the worst of it, though it took the better part of a year to completely recover the first time.
The thing I think that many people don’t get is the pain is utterly unremitting — it never eases, doesn’t ebb or get better, it’s so completely CONSTANT. Even when I’ve hurt myself or had stitches or some other injury, the pain eventually eases. This never happens with a herniated disk (well, yes supposedly it does, but it can take months or years).
The inability to sleep is just devastating. I was “sleeping” in the middle of a bed hunched over a beanbag chair. That was the only way I could do it. I had trouble standing up, sitting down, virtually any movement. One night I put my daughter to bed, read her a story, and couldn’t get up. I waited until she fell asleep, and crawled from her room down the hall, teeth gritted so I wouldn’t cry out and wake her up, tears streaming down my face, to the kitchen where I could use a countertop to pull myself to my feet.
The first time I initially sought chiropractic help, which is NOT what I needed, and ended up suffering a couple of weeks of unnecessary pain before I contacted an orthopedist. I still remember that call — a very sympathetic nurse talked to me, and said, “I’m about to become your best friend. I promise I’ll get you in to see someone TODAY.” She did, too.
The second time my disk acted up, I knew right away what was wrong, and took immediate steps. I’d squirreled away some of my meds which got me through until I could get in to see my doctor. Still unpleasant, but knowing what had happened and what I needed to do helped a LOT. I’d also lost over 40 pounds since the first incident (because I did NOT want to go through that again) and, even though that didn’t completely “protect” me, I recovered completely this time within a few weeks. But I’ll freely admit to severe depression and more than a few suicidal thoughts during my first experience.
Sorry to ramble on so. Just know you’re not alone.
Glad you`re okay PAD I`ve got an MRI tomorrow for a spinal condition that has been getting worse. Probably should have done this years ago, but been kind of afraid that surgery might be required, but it`s getting to the point where i`m start to run out of choices.
Wait a minute… “Nearly three weeks ago”? That means you were answering our questions whilst enduring unspeakable pain. And you’re back so soon? You, sir, are a trooper! You sure you don’t have some sort of mutant persistence factor going on…?
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Rest. Recover. Relax. We’ll still be here. (Try and get rid of us….)
PAD,
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Wishing you a speedy recovery. I had a similar experience a few years ago. I had a herniated disc in my neck that required surgery. And about a week before I saw the specialist my regular doctor recommended, who immediately sent me to the hospital, I had to make a five-hour drive home with constant shooting pain in my right arm. Boy, was that fun.
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Prior to the sudden onset of the arm pain, I’d been feeling pain in my shoulder area for some time. Said pain continually laughed at the medicine my doctor had prescribed.
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Speaking of doctors with interesting names, when I broke my collarbone as a kid, the doctor’s name was Dr. Risk.
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Anyway, glad to hear you’re finally feeling somewhat better. But between you and me, somebody’s got to get moving on developing the less invasive (and thus less painful) surgical techniques used by Dr. McCoy.
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Rick
Dr. Faust. That is rather amusing. When my nephew was in an accident, he was treated by a Dr. House. Which actually makes me wonder if you got a new appreciation for his character — given his daily battle with pain, an all.
Ye gods…! Anything I could think of to say at this point would fall way short, so just take care of yourselves.
I had to ask: did Dr. Faust look more like Gérard Philippe or like Michel Simon ?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/La_Beaut%C3%A9_du_diable
Gerard Philip, no question.