Month: February 2006

Understand that I absolutely don’t give a crap about the game. But the commercials warrant comment. So before I forget them, I’m going to comment on them as we go (and maybe about the game as well, but don’t count on it):

6:35: The Bud Light commercial with beer being hid all over the office as an incentive, thus resulting in chaos. It almost makes me want to go out and drink a Bud Light, and I don’t even drink beer. Hysterical, particularly the last bit when the boss gets tackled.

Burger King: At last Burger King acknowledges, at least in song, that their Burger King Mascot is “freaky” looking. If a member of SCA ever adopted a serial killer disguise, that would be the result. As for the rest of the over-the-top Busby Berkely-esque number celebrating the construction of a whopper…I don’t think I’ll ever eat another whopper.

6:39: Sierra mist: I’m pretty sure I ran into those security inspectors coming back from South Dakota.

Second Bud Light commercial: “The Magic Fridge.” Whoever is handling the Bud Light campaign, they’re brilliant. “Magic Fridge” is, so far, the best commercial of the evening.

6:46: Hybrid commercial. Eh.

FED Ex! Entertaining with impressive FX, and then slam dunked the final moment with the caveman getting wiped out by the passing mastodon.

Bud Light: Wow. Third BL commercial in a row that’s a winner. Not quite as good as “Magic Fridge,” but the outrage from the guy shouting “Not cool!” as his friend thoughtlessly leaves him to a bear’s mercies just to grab a Bud Light…that was great.

6:51: V FOR VENDETTA: “From the creators of the Matrix trilogy.” Gee, here I thought it was from Alan Moore. Looks cool, though. First footage that I’ve seen of it.

DIET PEPSI: Great to see Jay Mahr, but it doesn’t especially make me want to get a Diet Pepsi.

I think the Seahawks should win. They have snappier uniforms.

One of the announcers–Kath says it’s John Madden–sounds like Penn Jilette of Penn & Teller, except just a bit huskier, like Penn if he smoked too much.

COMMERCIAL CATCH-UP:

Aleve: Aside from the fact that Aleve is what I use if I pull muscles bowling or something, the use of Nimoy unable to do the Vulcan salute without taking some was brilliant. The new funniest commercial of the evening, although probably only because we’re fans.

Diet Pepsi: Much more imaginative than the first one, especially with the snarky substitution of Diet Coke for the stunt sequence.

Ameriquest: A funny sequence, but it doesn’t make me want to mortgage the house.

Bud Light: The most elaborate, and each one a masterpiece of absurdist writing with brilliant timing. What made this one was the total lack of reaction from the wife as her husband crashed through the ceiling…with the capper being his declaration of “I’m all right!” followed by getting clonked with the falling toolbox. Who the hëll is writing these? David Ives?

Budweiser; Broncos vs. the Rams. Cute.

Mobile ESPN: Nicely done. Fantastic if you’re a sports fan. I’m not sure, but I think that was pro bowler Chris Barnes in there.

7:18–Career Builder.com. Entertaining.

Escalade: Eh.

7:20–MI3. Saw the trialer before. Looks interesting.

Dove Self-Esteem fund: As a father of daughters, and having had to deal with their self-esteem issues, I highly approve of this. I’ll be checking into it.

7:26: The Shaggy Dog: Seen the trailer, and the commentary doesn’t do much.

Ford Hybrid: Not thrilled with my favorite Muppet song being put into a commercial.

Michelob: Boy, I just can’t get enough of actors tackling each other.
7:35: Go Daddy: Wow. That was…pointless.

7:38: Poseidon, the remake of the Poseidon Adventure. I’ve no more interest in seeing it now than I did decades ago.

Gilette Fusion: Eh.

7:41: Overstock.com. A female-oriented commercial during Superbowl. What were the odds?

7:45: Standard Walt Disney commercial.

7:56: Sprint: Okay, THAT was funny. “Crime deterrent.” Heh.

Toyota Rav 4: If I were in the market for a car, I’d check it out.

Prudential: Eh.

8:05: I haven’t been commenting on the ABC house ads, but the “Might as well face, you’re addicted to Lost” is the best so far.

8:25: Okay, that was a better Disney commercial.

8:33: Ameriquest: Even better than the first. But I still don’t want to refinance the house.

MotoPebl…Uhm…okay.

Sharpee Retractable: I had that at a recent convention and got oohs and aahs from fans and pros, underscoring for me just how easy it is to impress fans and pros sometimes.

Been off for a while, dealing with Caroline. The only commercial I’ve seen since then that’s really memorable–the one that easily wins the “Okay, that’s just F’d up,” is the Hummer commercial: A female Godzilla mates with a giant robot to create “the little Monster” called Hummer. That’s just wrong on so many level…but it’s memorable.

Oh, also the MacGuyer Mastercard ad was pretty good.

9:54: “Running Scared.” Eh.

“Outback”. Eh. We eat there occasionally, but that ocmmercial wouldn’t make me want to.

With the Superbowl ended and Caroline still fussing we have stumbled upon her dream TV program: Puppy Bowl II. From now until midnight on Animal Planet it’s nothing but a dozen or so puppies cavorting in a minature football stadium. I’ve never seen Caroline so blissful.

Oh my God! It’s the Kitty half-time show.

I’m posting it here on a separate thread so the discussion of X-FACTOR #3 can remain focused on that issue rather than going off the rails.

The report is correct: Issue #4 of X-FACTOR will be Ryan’s last. This is entirely his decision. Andy and I would love for him to stay on, and Ryan reportedly loves the book, but he has taken himself off it because–I presume, since I haven’t spoken to him–the monthly schedule is just too problematic for him. He is, however, going to be continuing doing the covers.

Dennis Calero, who I think is doing an excellent job, will be doing issues 5 and 6, and Ariel Olivetti is doing issue 7 (the one that addresses the death of Banshee.) An announcement of an artist beyond that point would be premature, although Andy is considering several possibilities, all of whom I believe would be great for the series.

As for Ryan, it was far too short an association for my taste, and I’m certainly hoping to work with him again.

PAD

Issue #3 of what is essentially a four-issue introductory arc. Whad’ja think?

PAD

People in showbiz (and other bizzes, I imagine) refer to the Flyby (or Flyover) States…that is, states that don’t register on their personal radar other than that they fly by them while jetting from Los Angeles to New York and back. Well, fly by states have viewers with ratings boxes as much as NY and CA do, and I have a strong feeling that they’ll be watching something else this year for the Oscars.

(Broad brush warning: The following is speaking in generalities, not individuals. If you feel you’re an exception, then you probably are. I’m speaking of general viewing habits, not specific viewers.)

None of this year’s Oscar nominated films are remotely what one would call populist fare. My purely unscientific guess is that the vast majority of film goers have not seen the vast majority of this year’s films or its nominees. Not only that, but two of the films focus on homosexual protagonists (“Capote,” “Brokeback Mountain”), but one of the nominees (Felicity Huffman) plays a transsexual. So not only do you have no films that are general viewer turn-ons (such as “Titanic” was), but considering the number of states that went out of their way to introduce the legislative bigotry that is the gay marriage ban (there, I fixed it, happy? You knew what I meant), I have to think you’ve got some active turn-offs in there. This may well be the first Oscar cast that’s picketed by the religious right.

And who’s the MC? Jon Stewart, whose work I adore and you probably do as well. But compared to the heartland appeal of Johnny Carson, or the vaudeville schticky “eager to please you” Billy Crystal, Stewart may well be perceived as that smart ášš smug New York Jew (plus anyone who doesn’t have cable may well not know who the hëll he is.)

When you consider all that, I have a sneaking suspicion that this year’s Oscar cast may well have ratings that make the Tonys look like a ratings bonanza.

Me, I’ll be watching. What can I say? I’m a glutton for glitzy out-of-control sluggish behemoths of awards shows. Plus it’s Jon Stewart, and we smart ášš smug New York Jews must show solidarity. But I’m doubting I’ll have a ton of company, especially in the Fly Bys.

PAD