“Fonzie in 2008”

After some thought, I’ve decided the Fonz is the ideal presidential Candidate for 2008. Since the country has effectively Jumped the Shark with the election just past, there’s no one more appropriate.

I’ve even got the slogan: “Putting the ‘Aaaaay!’ in Aaaaay-merica.”

PAD

who are the other three?

Consider: People have claimed that the Red Sox winning the World Series would be one of the sure signs of the impending Apocalypse.

If we take that as a given, then we are prompted to consider that George W. Bush has repeatedly described himself as “a war president.” Over and over again. He launched an unprovoked war and has gotten the approval of a grateful citizenry for it.

So Bush is War.

Which leads me to wonder…who are Pestilence, Famine and Death?

Suggestions?

PAD

My guess for the election

Purely a guess, but I wouldn’t be surprised if we actually have a Bush landslide.

If and when that happens, Bush should be sure to send bin Laden a nice fruit basket. Because for the first nine months, Bush’s presidency was a joke. Then the towers fell, and he was no less a joke than before, but people became afraid to laugh.

It is amazing that Bush can make 9/11 the centerpiece of his campaign without the vast majority of Americans saying, “Hey, wait…that happened on your watch, didn’t it? And the guy who did it is still out there, but we’re supposed to feel safer with you in charge? What’s up with THAT?” It’s like the people of South Park strangely feeling safer when Officer Barbrady is running things. And yet polls show they do. Of course, a poll also showed that 75% of Bush’s supporters believe Saddam had WMDs and 72% think Saddam was connected with 9/11. So you just get the feeling a lot of people aren’t paying attention.

In any event, I think the only reason that people are undecided is because they know in their hearts that Bush is lame, but they haven’t brought themselves to embrace Kerry. So my guess is that the undecideds will just stay home, and that should pretty much be the ball game.

Still, it’ll be interesting to see what the gargantuan scandals will be that rock the Bush administration in the next four years, and by what point the American people will get fed up being fed the language of fear. In the meantime, so much for stem cell research, and God only knows what the Supreme Court will be like four years from now.

PAD

(Peter, would you like to bet cash on that? I have $10 for the CBLDF that says Kerry wins decisively. –GH)

(Fine by me, Glenn. Me, I’m guessing it’s never too soon to start printing up those “Don’t blame me, I voted for Kerry” bumper stickers we should be needing in the next few years.–PAD)