I’ve known Walter Koenig for a whole buncha years now; last time I saw him was at George Takei’s wedding. When I heard his son disappeared, I prayed he’d return safely. And it’s true that God answers all prayers, but sometimes the answer is “No.”
No matter how depressed you are, no matter how bad things may be, suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Seek help. Seek support in the arms of friends. Don’t go the path of Andrew, because although you may believe you’re ending your pain, the amount of pain you will be leaving behind you for your loved ones is incalculable.
My greatest sympathies to Walter and his family.
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What you said.
Nothing more needs be said. Sad, sad story.
So, so sad. It is such a horrible, shattering thing to lose a child.
Prayers for the entire Koenig family.
Terrible news.
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I can’t imagine the pain the family must be going through right now. Our prayers are with the Koenig family.
Thanks Peter. I am going through a very bad stretch as far as jobs right now. This helps keep things in perspective.
He was a talented guy (I felt his Joker from the fan film BATMAN: DEAD END was one of the better interpretations of the character) and his death is an absolute tragedy. My deepest sympathies to his family and friends.
Blessed be the true Judge…my heart goes out to the family. I’ll be making a donation to the Yellow Ribbon Project after this.
I lost a lot of joy in my life because of depression. Depression had me cornered for decades. Somehow, somehow, somehow, it is now gone. I should have gone for help, but I didn’t. I managed to get through it on my own, but would have gotten through it much faster with help.
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I also urge those feeling depression to get help. You may need medicine, you may need to change your lifestyle, and you may just need counseling in how to adapt your thinking. But it is impossible to know without talking to someone about it.
Very sad news. It was tough to watch his parents on the Today show early in the week, especially when the reporter gently asked Walter about fearing the worst. He didn’t want to think about that.
I don’t have children, so I can’t imagine what they are feeling.
I hope this at least inspires others in Andrew’s situation to get help. Depression is a serious, and often misunderstood, disease. It needs to be treated as seriously as heart disease.
Very sad news.
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I don’t know if it’s of any help but I’m reminded of Stephen Fry’s take on depression. It seems to be genuine and can be found on a variety of webpages. Here’s one (I hope this works and that it’s ok to do this):
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Oops. Obviously not.
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If anyone’s interested, a quick google search will dig it up. Stephen Fry really is a very clever man.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AQkE56eFyk4
This is truly a tragic thing. the idea that someone no longer feels life is worth living is incredibly sad. I’ve had mild bouts with it, as I’m sure many have. But I’ve never seriously contemplated ending my life.
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I do have someone very close to me who has attempted suicide about a half dozen times in the last decade. She truly gets to a point where not only does she want her pain to end, but that everyone she knows would actually be better off.
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Especially since no one else close to her wants to face the reality of what she’s going through and I can’t wave a magic wand to have her “get better and happy” it is an extremely scary, powerful and, yes, depressing feeling.
Very sad news, and my heart goes out to Walter Koenig and his family.
I know how it feels to be depressed. I’m living with it on a daily basis. And, yes, I’ll be honest enough to admit that I’ve tried to commit suicide a few times. Sometimes, real life (and people whom you thought you could trust) deals you one major blow after another, so that with time, living seems meaningless.
Life is still difficult, but I’ve been forcing my head into work (I don’t drink any anti-depressants. It messes with the way I think that it makes working difficult). Plus, there’s still this one tiny dream I have of becoming a published fiction writer. It’s probably this dream that’s keeping me alive more than anything else. I could only pray that it does come true in the near future.
Sadly, I’m betting everyone you know has had suicide impact their family or their circle of friends. I know I have.
As someone else said, depression is a serious and often misunderstood disease. And surviving friends and family members often punish themselves for “not doing more earlier”. It’s never that simple. Or that easy.
But is it a temporary problem? I don’t know the details of this specific case, but there are people who are clinically depressed and remain so for their entire lives. Bipolar disorders in particular only get worse and worse. Medication can only help so much before eventually it stops being effective.
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I’m not advocating suicide or anything, but if depression is a disease (which it is), it stands to reason that those who suffer from it should be given the same consideration as those who suffer from physically painful, terminal diseases and who seek a release from that pain.
Except that the pain of depression is not intractable – even when left untreated, it cycles, so that there are periods of feeling pretty much okay interspersed with the periods of darkness. Further, it is also eminently treatable, usually with a combination of medication and talk therapy (to help with the habits of depressed thought). I get to be my wife’s talk therapist, since we can’t afford the real thing…
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(There’s a line in Spider Robinson’s novel Very Bad Deaths which rings true with her psychologist. Paraphrasing, because I can’t get to my copy just now – “Doctors are happy when someone comes through their door with depression. Do you know why? Because of the hundreds of things that can go wrong with the human mind and brain, depression is the only one that can be cured, with better than 90% certainty, with a pill.”)
Robert,
“I’m not advocating suicide or anything, but if depression is a disease (which it is), it stands to reason that those who suffer from it should be given the same consideration as those who suffer from physically painful, terminal diseases and who seek a release from that pain.”
Sorry, Robert. But you’re way off base here. I have had to deal with and research this topic out of necessity and to treat people with depression as we would someone with inoperable cancer is terribly misguided.
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While many people will live with depression their entire lives, it is treatable, more than ever before. In some cases, it just takes a LOT of effort on the part of loved ones – and the individual themselves, of course – to overcome it more often than not.
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Making sure the person takes their medication; getting them to do some sort of exercise since that helps them work through their stress and gets good chemicals flowing to the brain and prevents them from spending the whole day in bed which many severely depressed people like to do.
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the main thing to do is make the effort to show the person they are loved and that they are worth something. In many cases, therapy is necessary, but a friend who will talk to them and truly listen helps as well.
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The main thing most depressed people need to understand is that their lives have value, that they are not a burden to others and that they ARE NOT ALONE.
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Sorry, but telling them that they’ll never get through their pain and should end it simply isn’t an option – at least not for me.
I know this may come across as an insensitive question, and I know that the media is frequently unreliable. But I was following this story, and these alleged facts seem to be undisputed.
1) He had a history of depression.
2) He was giving away his possessions.
3) He cleared out his apartment.
4) He said good bye to friends
5) He wrote a letter to his parents, which they described as a “despondent” tone.
Am I alone in thinking these are pretty serious signs? Or do they only become obvious in hindsight?
Mass giving away of things is a clear indicator that the person feels the end is near. Over the years, I’ve seen several old people start to do the same thing, and increasingly so as they got even older.
I agree with you Alan. I’ve seen it before with old relatives who feel the end is near.
To me, they are all kind of obvious signs, and when taken together, someone should have known it was on the cards.
Always a sad moment when a parent buries his/her child.
My thoughts are with the Koenig family and, as I write this, just saw on an entertainment website that it’s being reported that a son of Marie Osmond also ended his life.
I didn’t know about Andrew Koeing at all but it’s sad to hear about his suicide. My heart goes out to his family.
My condolences to the Koenig family.
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Rick
Sweet mother of mystery, I never made the connection. Condolences to Walter and family