Bela lay still on the floor long enough to give fans a raging thread to post about in blogs and forums about death and assault on THEIR character. Suddenly, she sat up as if her dramatic gasp for air had pulled her upright. The twine that bound her fell away.
Captain Jacque had manfully, skillfully, over-the-top, super-slow-motion, Matrix, Wanted, make-a-real-weapon-expert-pull-their-hair-out-from-the-improbability-of-it ….shot the bindings apart from Bela without leaving so much as a scratch on her.
The One True Potato and Captain Jacque separated suddenly. The kiss had provided an easy distraction for Bela to sneak to the entrance of the tree house to escape. As she opened the door to slip out she heard the Captain reveal what the kiss had provided him.
“You’re not Stephen Colbert!” shouted Captain Jacque.
“How could you know that?” demanded The One True Potato in reply.
“It’s really quite simple,” summarized Captain Jacque. “Stephen Colbert would not taste like potatoes, he would taste like Doritos. Everyone knows he’s in bed with Frito-Lay!”
“Curses!” cried The One True Potato.
“Any in particular?”
“I think drat or darn, given our linguistic writing parameters.”
“Hmmm. Ooh! How about fooey?”
“Fooey? Who uses that……”
Bela stopped listening to the exchange of curses as she slipped out the door and fell to the ground. She had forgotten she was in a treehouse. Her fall was broken by Edwood and Jakob who were standing at the base of the tree trying to out-dispassion each other. Both of them went down like wet sacks of potatoes. Then both of them stood up, returning to their dispassionate duel of nonchalance, leaving Bela on the ground – but as the center of attention – which made her less morose.
“How did you get here and how did Jakob return from were he came?” inquired Bela.
Edwood stared impassively as possible at Jakob while Jakob returned his gaze of detachment. Moments passed. The metal creatures all around began to become disinterested in the standoff and started to randomly disperse into the forest focused on chasing squirrels. It grew quiet, except for the faint sound of the continued exchange above…..
“Golly-gee-whillikers!” “Tarnation!” “Fooey!” “You already said fooey!” “I like fooey!”
Jakob decided it would be better to focus on pleasing Bela and made his move. He began to explain, “It was an epic ordeal that will be written about in flashbacks. We wound up escaping and using a time-honored ritual to revert me from penguin forms.”
Edwood countered with more plot exposition, “We had to use a PAL format television and invoke the former name of the country currently referring to itself as the Union of Myanmar.”
Jakob thrusted with additional obscure details, “… and dress in drag like old ladies and screech the incantation.”
Edwood parried with “…whatever.”
Jakob seethed with inexpressive detachment at the winning counter.
Suddenly, a crash from above drew everyone’s attention to the treehouse. The One True Potato and Captain Jacque had crashed through the window of the treehouse and were plummeting toward them.
• 
Y’all forgot about Bela’s injured legs 🙂
“Golly-gee-whillikers!” “Tarnation!” “Fooey!” “You already said fooey!” “I like fooey!” — great exchange
If the continuity monster were to rear its ugly head, it might point out that Bela, Edwood, and Jakob are having this plesent conversation in a field full of Daleks. Of course, it is also just as likely that the continuity monster has been captured and put down by animal control…
True that the real Colbert would most likely taste of Doritos. But how do we know that Potato isn’t a new flavor of Dorito? Ah, now to await the next part…
No, the Daleks were addressed:
.
The metal creatures all around began to become disinterested in the standoff and started to randomly disperse into the forest focused on chasing squirrels.
.
Some subsequent writer might decide, though, that that was far too easy a means of dismissing them. Or perhaps it is not all that it seems. That’s the joy of round robin. If someone feels that a ball was fumbled, they can pick it up themselves and run with it.
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PAD
I hope this story never ends (if we run out of new people, maybe we can get seconds).
Out of curiousity, roughly how many people are in the queue at this time?
Ah, I must have missed that sentence… Those poor squirrels!
The squirrels weren’t wearing tiny striped scarves, were they?
Out of curiousity, roughly how many people are in the queue at this time
.
The number doesn’t mean much because we’ve had a bunch of people drop out. On a practical basis, we’re about halfway through the queue. Believe it or not, though, we’re still on April 21. That is to say, we haven’t gone through all the people who responded on the very first day this was announced. So if you wrote in on the first day and think you were overlooked, the chances are that you weren’t.
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PAD
I hope this story never ends (if we run out of new people, maybe we can get seconds).
I want it to have an ending, but it’d be a fun annual event. Do a new round-robin story each year.
Corey
Re: “Curses”. Where’s the Middleman when he’s truly needed in this story?
(Seriously, nice bit)
>“It’s really quite simple,” summarized Captain Jacque. “Stephen Colbert would not taste like potatoes, he would taste like Doritos. Everyone knows he’s in bed with Frito-Lay!”
I imagine that it’s more akin to Dr. Pepper and Spicy Sweet Chili (or whatever the favor du jour is) Doritos since Pepsi owns Frito-Lay.
“(if we run out of new people, maybe we can get seconds).”
Yeah, I think going for a second round would be sweet.
As of this point I have no plans to continue “Potato Moon” beyond the current list of writers.
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PAD
Ah well, c’est la vie. Be interesting to see the whole thing end and how people will wrap it up.