NOTE FROM PAD: Richard came up to the hairy edge with character names here, but I let it go because–although he used a popular alias for the individual in question–it’s not the character’s real name..
The stranger whipped out a black billfold from his pocket and flashed
the contents at the confused foursome.
“As you can see here, I am Dr. John Smith, licensed potato inspector
for this county and you have clearly run into a doozy.” The stranger
slid over and scooped up some of the starchy mess from Edwood’s face.
“Wait a minute!” Jakob called out. “That paper was blank!”
“Impressive. You must have some latent psychic powers lying dormant
in your DNA.” The stranger smiled goofily. “Or you could be
incredibly thick. Still enough about you; let’s see what we have
here.” Dr. Smith pulled out a pair of glasses and studied the white
glop on the end of his finger.
“Hmmm. Clearly this came from the outer cutaneous layer of an amylose
based organism impregnated with a colloidal suspension of
triglycerides, lactose and dairy proteins.” Dr. Smith concluded.
“And what does that mean?” Woeisme demanded.
“I don’t know.” Dr. Smith admitted. “I just didn’t want to say a
mashed potato man.” The stranger replaced the glasses in his pocket
and swept his hands together. “Well, it was lovely to see you all
again.”
“Again?” Jakob wrinkled his brow. “But we’ve never met.”
“No, but we will and when we do, please remind me to take the potatoes
out of the oven. Very important.” The man nodded for emphasis. “Oh
before I forget, I really only dropped by to return these to you,
Woeisme.”
The stranger handed her a stack of three books. She scanned the
titles on the spine: Dr. Atkin’s New Diet Revolution, The South Beach
Diet, and Enter the Zone. Woeisme looked up at the stranger with a
look as blank as his paper.
“Trust me,” urged the stranger, “everything you need to fight the
carbs is in those books.” He swept his hand together with a clap.
“Now I’d love to stay and chat but there is a volcano spewing gravy
off the coast of Indonesia, a full on Ruskie russet riot in Kiev, and
I can’t miss the opening of the Potatoes Across the World exhibit a
second time so I’ll be off.”
Dumbfounded, the quartet simply watched as the stranger walked over to
the blue box and opened the door with key. He stepped partway in then
turned to look over his shoulder at them. “Oh by the way, tell Bela
it really is all about her. And Jakob, she had a message for you.
Just two words. Bad Wolf.” The stranger stepped inside his box. A
few moments later, there was a great grinding sound, the lamp at the
top of the box flashed and it faded away like a dream upon waking.
Woeisme shook her head to clear it. “That is last time I mix ketchup
and sweet and sour sauce.” She muttered. “I can’t handle it.” But
the books in her hand proved that the little man was no condiment
induced hallucination though later she would wish that he had been.
• 
That was very cool. It was like a character from later on in the book showing up and telling people critical information that they’ll need later on. Bonus points for everyone paying attention.
Well constructed little paws in the action.
Very nice bit of Doctoring. I’m glad he came and went quickly, that’s probably just about the right amount of this type of character.
My thoughts exactly. Much as I am a rabid DW fan, a nice cameo role is all the other fandoms should have in this.
I called it! I totally called it!
But technically, PAD, even calling him the Doctor wouldn’t be referring to him by his real name, as it’s never been revealed.
Plus there’s more than one scifi character out there known as Doctor. It could easily have been Robert Picardo in a bad wig. Which would have been just as funny, really.
I’m pretty sure the lawyers at the BBC would disagree with that logic.
Wish I’d thought of it having be another Doctor in a clever disguise though. That would have been funny.
Hey, I did say it was “TECHNICALLY” not his real name. I never said it wouldn’t get someone in trouble.
Well, it’s never too late for a Voyager reference. It’s also usually never a good idea to HAVE a Voyager reference, but that’s besides the point.
Ole’, dear sir! Bravo!
Thank you for the opening.
Ah, don’t thank me. Thank my predecessors for widening the gap by mentioning time and space displacement. The moment that happened I knew, no matter what I was able to work up for that chapter, just exactly how I wanted to end it.
Is this done yet???
No offense to any of the writers (who are dámņ brilliant), it was fun for awhile, but now it’s dragging on….
I strongly disagree. I’ve been fascinated to see where each new contributor takes it.
.
PAD
Yeah, I agree. I say you should go a full two rounds, keep it going for almost a solid year. God knows what it’d be by that point, but it’d be insane.
If it gets too convoluted, I say give it a Star Trek-esque reboot somewhere around chapter 75 just for the hëll of it.
TFE, At some point I expect to see a massive retcon and then a massive reset to the prior continuity in the same thread.
At this point we have enough contributors on deck for it to run several months, not a full year. When we get to the final, like, ten people, I’ll inform them they have to have an eye toward wrapping things up.
.
My fantasy is that we dragoon Stephenie Meyer to write the concluding chapter. How hilarious would THAT be.
.
PAD
Joe, it’s not just fun to read, it’s fun to participate. There are lots and lots of people who haven’t even had a turn yet.
.
It’s not keeping other stuff off the site. You’re not losing anything if other people get to keep enjoying it.
I’d fallen WAY WAY behind in reading these. (Like, maybe somewhere in the early teens?) And having gotten my call to duty this morning, I’m swiftly playing catch-up. Great Doctor Who reference, although now the fact that I was planning on throwing a reference to said show in my part will, sadly, seem slightly less original…
Ah, well. Woe is me! (He, he.) Still, since my reference was planned to be along rather different lines, I think I shall still use it.
Well, off I go. Still another twenty or so chapters to read before penning my own contribution!