PeterDavid.net

The IRA, after a hundred years of strife, has announced it’s laying down arms and wants to work toward its goals using non-violent means (as Kathleen has noted over on her website.)

So let’s say we flash forward ten years, and Al Qeada is still strong, in business, and a major terrorist force. Iraq is still a fragmented mess. And suddenly Al Qeada announces that it wants to lay down arms and work toward a peaceful unification of Iraq and the Muslim world.

Do we accept that? Do we start working with them?

PAD

A Kenyan City Councilman has offered forty goats and twenty cows to Bill Clinton in exchange for Chelsea’s hand in marriage.

Hey…don’t laugh. I have four daughters, and I very much doubt I’m going to get an offer anywhere NEAR as good for them. “Mr. David, I’d like to ask you for the hand of your daughter (Shana/Gwen/Ariel/Caroline) in marriage.” And if I say, “Yeah? How many goats we talking about? How many cows?” the guy’ll probably just give me a weird look while the daughter in question rolls her eyes and tells her intended, “Just ignore him. I told you he’d be like this.”

I bet I don’t get any livestock at all. The guy’ll just say “Don’t have a cow, man,” and think it’s all a joke, and I’ll be lucky if I wind up with a coupon for a free Big Mac. Plus I have to pay for the wedding to boot.

Anyone have that Kenyan guy’s phone number? I wonder if he’s the one who’s been writing to me about trying to get $5 million into the country if I just give him my bank account info.

PAD

So I had the TV on just for background noise while I was working, and suddenly some TV doctor comes on and starts talking about how–if you feel tingling or heaviness in your legs–you may have peripheral artery disease, or P.A.D.

That got my attention. I looked up and watched in annoyance as the doctor proceeded to tell you everything you can and should do (including, of course, buying a particular product) in order to combat the terrible hazard that is P.A.D. And there’s my initials all over the commercial. “Beware of P.A.D.” “Know the early warning signs so you can avoid P.A.D.” “P.A.D., the silent killer.”

At least it’s not something that requires a rectal exam to detect. “Make sure your doctor sticks his finger up your butt to see if there’s any warning signs of P.A.D. in there.”

PAD

Okay, here’s the thing: I’m working on a book for Krause Publications on writing comics, and I need some specific photographs. However I can’t simply download them from the internet because there’s copyright issues. So what I need is some very clear, reproducable digital photographs that were taken by travelers with their very own cameras, and who won’t mind if I repro them in the book with the total payment being you get a photo credit and a free copy of the book.

Here’s what I need:

Mount Rushmore
The Citicorp building in New York
The Twin Towers (pre-destruction, obviously)
Downtown Schenectady, or a sign reading “Welcome to Schenectady.”

Yeah, I know, that last one might be a problem.

Anyone who can help me out, drop a note to me at padguy@aol.com.

Thanks.

PAD

March 20, 1992

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There’s certain rides at Disneyworld where, if you don’t go on it while you’re there, you just don’t feel like you’ve actually visited (although your next month’s Amex bill will probably provide confirmation that you did.) It’s different rides for different folks. In my case, it’s always been the Peter Pan ride, one of the very first rides I ever went on back when I was on a high school trip to the Magic Kingdom.

As it so happens, it was also Carol Kalish’s favorite ride. Carol, Marvel’s former direct sales head and a good friend who died far too soon, loved the Peter Pan ride (although it was marred for her during one outing when she went on with a comic book retailer and he spent the whole ride talking about Marvel’s rack credit program).

So I was very interested in how her namesake, Caroline, would react on her first excursion on that same ride.

As we stood in line, I pointed at the passing pirate ships and told Caroline we were going to fly. “Fly?” she said uncertainly. “Fly in ships?” She wasn’t sanguine about it at all. When we clambered into the vessel (Kath and Ariel were in the one in front of us) Caroline clutched tightly and nervously to the lap bar that settled on us. Her eyes went wide as we moved forward, up, and then appeared to be hurtling into thin air (naturally she didn’t look up to see that we were being carried on an overhead track.)

“See, Caroline? We’re flying,” I told her, and pointed at the “night sky” over London. “See? There’s the stars. And there’s the city, way down there!”

“Stars,” she whispered in astonishment. And then, as we went higher, she suddenly pointed and gasped in delirious joy, “It’s the moon!”

Sure enough, just to our left was a large full moon. The silhouettes of Peter, Wendy et al were moving across it as it turned. I had my arm wrapped around Caroline just to make sure nothing happened. And she stretched out her little fingers, desperate to touch it, not quite succeeding. Completely enthralled in Disney magic, she cried out, “Oh, Da! It’s the moon!”

She watched the rest of Neverland with proper amazement. And although there were any number of rides and character greetings she enjoyed, that was the one moment in the park where she was totally swept away by pure fantasy-made-real. For a few seconds, one little girl sailed through the stars in a pirate ship and came justthatclose to touching the moon.

If Carol was watching through her eyes, I think she liked what she saw.

PAD

I was reading up on the new Supreme Court nominee to try and determine when (not if) Roe v. Wade will be overturned, and came across the following:

One Roberts case receiving particularly close attention involves a 2003 challenge to the federal Endangered Species Act. At issue was whether the act could be invoked to protect a certain species of toad that exists entirely in California and was being threatened by a development project. The appeals court ruled that under Congress’s commerce-clause powers, the Endangered Species Act extends protection to the toad.

In his dissent, he said the full court should agree to hear the case to more faithfully apply two Supreme Court precedents establishing limits on Congress’s commerce-clause powers. He noted that the Fifth US Circuit Court of Appeals had recently adopted a similar, more restrictive, reading of commerce-clause authority and the Endangered Species Act.

That Roberts, who routinely appears to side with big business (and also appears to reject any restriction on presidential power–gee, hard to see what makes him attractive to Bush) wanted to take on the case isn’t the issue for me.

What bugs me is that if someone wants to build a development on MY home, and I protest that, then it’s tough beans. I lose my home. I’m screwed. But if someone wants to disenfranchise a freakin’ toad, THAT’S where the line is drawn? What the hell–?!?

That’s it. I’m building a small enclosure in my back yard and getting me some of those toads. Either that or I’m going to lobby for Jews and/or liberals to be considered an endangered species.

PAD

Spent the morning at Animal Kingdom, with the highlight being an audioanimatronic velociraptor named “Lucky” who actually free-range walks down the streets of the AK’s Dinosaur section. We saw him just in time since, at the end of the month, he’s being shipped off to the newly opening Hong Kong Disney (now all we need is a gigantic free-roaming Godzilla for Tokyo Disney.)

Not sure what to do about dinner. We had reservations at a restaurant in the Magic Kingdom where Caroline would have a chance to meet Pooh and friends. Unfortunately she is currently sound asleep and we’re reluctant to wake her, since that will put her in a fiercely bad mood for the rest of the evening. We don’t want to be the kind of parents who basically browbeat our kids into having fun.

We’ll be at the Adventurers Club this evening, just me and Kath getting to be grown-ups. Ariel has gamely agreed to watch her little sister tonight.

PAD

I’ve flown Jetblue any number of times and had no problem. So it was startling that my return from San Diego was as much of a fiasco as it was, especially considering that I was lied to by virtually every Jetblue employee that I encountered.

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This blog notes the passing of James Doohan at the age of 85.

As many of you know, Peter worked with James on his autobiography, Beam Me Up, Scotty. I’m sure Peter will have more to post about this sad event, and the man himself, later.

Feel free to use this as an open thread.

Well, not “back” technically. Down in Florida where my family is vacationing….the “getting to” of which via Jetblue was a horror story that I’ll write up in my next blog entry.

Most of my San Diego “news” has already been posted elsewhere. Yes, “X-Factor,” the continuation of “Madrox,” will be starting up in November. Yes, I’ve signed with Pocket books to do two Marvel novels, “Fantastic Four” and “Wolverine.” Yes, I’ll be leaving the Hulk because my work load has effectively quadrupled, although I certainly wouldn’t rule out coming back to it at some point in the near future.

Overall, had a really good time this year. Made a lot of very positive contacts, had meals with a variety of friends including Marv Wolfman, Len Wein, Mike Richardson, Mark Evanier, Maggie Thompson, Paul Dini, Chris Valada and her son (whose name escapes me, sorry, dude.) Attended fun parties including a Stan Lee bash where I met Dallas Cowboy Darian Barnes, who turned out to be a big fan of my work (he let me hold his Superbowl ring while he checked out my 800 Bowling ring, an action that Barbara Kesel opined had a bizarre subtext she didn’t want to dwell on.) Met John Landis and his son, attended the Eisners, participated in panels, actually walked the entire floor of the dealers room, resisted the temptation to drop $250 on a replica of the Shakespeare bust from “Batman”, meeted and greeted many fans including folks on this board (including various lurkers who I urged to participate), and found the time to buy and read the latest Harry Potter book (which I’ll start a thread on once more people have had a chance to read it, so please don’t comment on it here.)

For me, a high point was having the chance to chat with Ray Harryhausen. I asked him what he thought of today’s CGI effects versus the way it was done in his day. He made a really valid point: That he preferred the monsters and such that he produced in his day, because the fact that they weren’t perfect–but only close approximations of human or animal movement–gave them a nightmarish quality that heightened the fear element. But that the computerized images generated now are so perfect, that they’ve taken the fantastic and rendered them mundane. I think he may well be right.

In any event, more abot the Jetblue horror show later. We’re off now to visit with Shana.

PAD

“Continuity you weren’t expecting”. Coined by Peter at the Comics Weblog at San Diego Comic-Con– which oddly enough, none of the celebrity bloggers are blogging now.

Yes, I’m cheating, I had to wait till I got back to my room. I stopped paying $4.95 an hour for connectivity when AOL went to an all-you-can-download plan.

March 13, 1992

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March 13, 1992

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Getting ready to hustle out to San Diego. Here’s my schedule at the present time:

Thursday, 4:30 to 5:30 — Comic Book Weblogs
Saturday, 11:30 to 1:00 — Impact University: How to Write and Draw Comics
Saturday, 1:00 to 2:00 – Signing at IDW.
Saturday, 3:00 to 4:00 — IDW Publishing Overview
Sunday, 11:30 to 12:30 – CBLDF panel (I *think* I’m on this.)
Sunday, 1:00 to 2:00 — Marvel Comics’ Spider-Man: The Other

I’ll also be signing at the Claypool table from 4-5 on Saturday, Sunday and Monday, and I’ll be at the Krause Publications/Impact booth as well. I’m not sure of the times on that yet, so we’ll all be surprised.

PAD

In the interest of full disclosure, I will state what most of you already know: I wrote the novelization of “Fantastic Four.” So obviously it’s to my benefit for the film to do well. Anyone who feels that linkage to the film colors my opinion can disregard it as he or she sees fit.

Now–

Just came back from the FF screening in the city. I heard a number of adults crabbing about how terrible it was, and I was left wondering whether they saw the same film I did. I then asked every kid I could find who was in attendance what they thought of it, and kids of (literally) all ages loved it. Girls liked Sue Storm, boys grooved on the Thing and, particularly, the Human Torch. No one loved Reed. But, hey, what else is new?

Whatever you’re expecting in terms of the more mature angle that comic book films have taken, be it “Batman Begins,” “Sin City,” or even the sophistication of X2…to enjoy “Fantastic Four,” you simply have to set the wayback machine in your mind back to when comic books (and movies thereof) were mostly cornball fun. Think “Superman” but without the camp. Some mild spoilers follow:

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We have a number of regular participants and occasional contributors to this blog who reside in London or vicinity. Please sound off so we know you’re okay.

PAD

Johanna Draper-Carlson was, and is, a bigger supporter of “Fallen Angel.” So when she expressed enthusiasm about the upcoming Spike one-shot, I offered to send her the completed script. She read it and loved it. Her comments can be found in the July 5th installment of her blog, “Cognitive Dissonance.” If I do this right, the link below should take you to it.

http://www.comicsworthreading.com/blog/cwr.html

PAD

I think I speak for most New Yorkers when I say–without the slightest intention of sour grapes–good. One less thing to worry about.

PAD

So to give Kath more time to work on the costumes, Ariel and I took Caroline to a local kiddie amusement park that she’d never been to. Dead center of the place was a carousel. Caroline absolutely loves carousels, ever since Kath took her on the main one at the Magic Kingdom in Disneyworld. Having bought unlimited ride passes for the sisters, I stood behind the fence as Caroline was seated on one of the horses, Ariel one horse over. The young lady running the ride clipped Caroline into place with a seatbelt that snapped behind her.

The carousel began turning. It was going at a pretty brisk pace, but Caroline was undaunted, grinning like a loon.

Then I noticed she appeared to be shifting off-center, hanging more toward the outside. That was when I saw that the belt had somehow come unclipped from behind her and was dangling uselessly on either side. Ariel hadn’t spotted it yet. The only thing that was preventing Caroline from being flung off the carousel at high speed was her own grip on the pole.

The operator was in the middle of the carousel. I shouted over the music, “Shut it down! She’s not buckled in” as I yanked open the gate. The operator saw it and killed the power, but there’s no braking mechanism; it moves until it stops. Ariel, realizing, grabbed Caroline’s foot, but Caroline was now 3/4 of the way off the horse.

I ran alongside the carousel, grabbed one of the freestanding poles, and jumped on while it was still spinning, bounced between two horses like a pinball, got to Caroline and yanked her back up onto the horse. Caroline continued to grin. Not a trace of concern. I buckled the seatbelt around her myself this time, testing it. It must not have fully engaged the first time. The operator asked if I’d like to stand next to Caroline and just ride along, which was fine by me.

Ariel then went off to drive the Go-carts. And Caroline, who didn’t have to get off the carousel because there really wasn’t a line of kids waiting to get on, proceeded to ride to her heart’s content.

Forty five minutes.

Forty five frickin’ minutes of non-stop carousel. The more nauseated I got, the happier she got. Finally I couldn’t take it anymore, forcibly removed her from it and said, “We’re doing something else now.” I carried her away while she was kicking and screaming and yelling, “Horse! Horse!”

Later, as Caroline rode on the teacup ride with Ariel, I called Kath and said, “Just out of curiosity, how did you get Caroline off the merry go round at Disneyworld? Did she eventually tire of it?”

“No,” said Kathleen. “I had to carry her away while she was kicking and screaming.”

Twenty years from now, when they ask me at what point I knew she was going to be a jockey, I’ll be able to tell them. Although she’ll probably be over six feet tall, so maybe that’s not really a career path for her.

PAD