Just came back from seeing “Underworld,” a film that could well have (indeed, perhaps should have) been filmed in black and white. It was like watching the world’s longest “Obession by Calvin Klein” ad.
The film is a curious paradox of moving along both briskly and slowly. The story pacing is quick enough, but the problem is that the audience forms no emotional connection with the protagonists. Selene, the vampire (Kate Beckinsale) is written, directed, filmed and edited to be remote, so it’s hard to care about what happens to her. The way into the film could have been through Michael (Scott Speedman), the human who attracts Selene’s attention because he in turn is being sought by werewolves (or “Lycans”). But the movie’s told from her POV, not his, and beyond the fact that he’s an intern, we don’t know anything about him…or, at the very least, enough to make us care if he’s bitten by werewolves or vampires or the acting bug.
The way to make the film work would have been to tell the entire story from Michael’s point of view and learn about the warfare between vamps and werewolves through him. Or, if it’s to be Selene’s story, intercut between modern day and her origins, like “Highlander,” which took this basic “mysterious group of people trying to kill each other” bit and did it far better. As it is, we’re hit with a bunch of emotional reveals in the last fifteen minutes of the movie that are designed to throw our perceptions of the characters on our ears. But instead of being emotionally shocking, as the filmmakers presumably hoped, you just go, “Oh. Okay. That’s interesting.”
A sequel is built into the conclusion. Joy.
PAD
• 
It was like watching the world’s longest “Obession by Calvin Klein” ad.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
My wife went to see it; she said she wanted to because it looked like a “dark” version of the Matrix. I avoided several other comments that tried to get out of my head and instead queried “Dark version of the Matrix? Oh, and having most of humanity being stored in pods and used for robot food isn’t dark enough for you?”
I still haven’t seen it, because that whole shooting a hole in the floor thing is way too Bugs Bunny for me. The DVD should be out by Christmas, anyway.
I have to agree with just about everything you said, Peter. Yet another example of style over substance. What could have been a pretty cool idea let down by bad direction, bad editing and a weak script. I didn’t have any empathy for either of the main characters, mainly because I knew little more about them by the end of the film than the beginning. The first half of the film gives us very little exposition, loading it all into the final half hour, destroying whatever pace it should have had. And the climactic battle- we’re supposed to get all hyped up about this uber-transformation, and what we get is a badly designed makeup. What a letdown.
I don’t know about anyone else, but I’m getting pretty tired of this Matrix-inspired sunglasses-wearing monochomatic latex-and-leather look. I’m also tired of the depressing rain-drenched Eastern European look. Del Toro used it to excellent advantage in Blade 2, but let’s stop now. I’m glad the people of Prague are getting lots of money poured into the local economy, but it doesn’t give me much hope (not that I had much anyway) for the Aliens vs Predator film that’s shooting over there.
The thing that annoys me is that the premise was a natural. A war between vampires and werewolves: how can you mess that up? Well they did.
If anybody is looking to see this movie that hasn’t done so already, don’t. There are so many better films out there right now. Without reservation, I would recommend American Splendor, Camp and Lost in Translation as the best bets. If you like action-adventure, I’d suggest Once Upon A Time in Mexico (mainly for Depp’s scene-stealing performance yet again) or The Rundown (I know, I can’t believe I’m saying it, but The Rock is actually much better than in The Scorpion King). And I also enjoyed Matchstick Men and Secondhand Lions, both of which had a few minor flaws (including the miscasting of Michael Caine in the latter) but they’re well worth it nonetheless. I even liked parts of Duplex, but wouldn’t recommend it. But Underworld? Skip it.
I did review of this flick — I’ll post the site when the review is up, but on a rating from 0 to *, I gave this one a **.
I appreciate that they didn’t just make it a supernatural slugfest, but there were LONG lulls between the start and finish. The fight scenes should have been sped up (to reflect the supernatural beings’ speed) instead of slowed down to look like THE MATRIX. Most of the combat was with weapons (as someone else said, why have vampires and werewolves if they’re just going to shoot bullets?), and while both sides have bullets than can kill the others, these barely appeared in the film. Plus, perhaps due to bad lighting, Kate Beckinsale didn’t seem hot in skin-tight leather with corset. Who knew?
Just came back from seeing it (my second time but my friend’s first). I liked it more. After my first viewing I thought it showed excellent promise. I am a fan of vamp and wolf myths and such but always felt they were mishandled… especially when they tried to do both together. I enjoyed the war aspect. I got into the gunplay because it made sense. When two foes fight that are pretty evenly matched with some members stronger than otehrs on both sides, fighting from a distance and with advanced weaponry makes sense to me. As for giving a rat’s tushy for the main characters, well the chick was a vampire “death dealer” so was’t big on the warm and fuzzy feelings and Michael was a twit who was too busy trying to figure out what was going on to give us a rant about his inner demons and drives. Plus, who cares? Neo is a dead fish in the matrix flicks and his character will only make sense if he’s revealed to be a program and Trinity barely shows a pulse but the first film was still fun. (The second was crap, but that’s beside the point.) I enjoyed the intrigue of Underworld and the depth of the mythology. I had faults with it (I prefer werewolves with hair, the elder vampire chick seemed to fold like a deck of cards and some Craven’s accent had me wondering where he was really from) but overall I am expecting a good sequel (better than Reloaded). And the big fight at the end was a hoot (and showed the speed they had) but I hate it when the big part/finale is in the trailer. Hate that so much! Anyway, I recommend it to certain friends but not others but that’s because I am selective and understand the concept of different strokes blah blah blah. Oh, and I liked Once Upon a Time but failed to get into American Splendor…too dámņ boring for me.
I heard that Marvel was doing a new comic book called the INVADERS, based in 2004 but taking some of the characters from the WW 2 team, Spitfire, Union Jack with a bunch of newer hereoes. They were Londons answer to “homeland security” and marvel hopes they turn into a popular comic like JSA for DC. I heard Peter was approached to write. Any word?
PAD,
Not only is a sequel built into the movie, the studio has already greenlit TWO sequels!
Once again, it’s the Matrix effect…
You know what ? I think I’m deaf since I saw that movie… too much gunshots, too noisy…
Chris,
where did you hear these “news”?
Pascal
It’s really strange…
Of all the people in the world that would like this movie, you’d figure I’d have been one of them.
But I didn’t.
I think what ruined it for me was all the vampires running around in goth clothes from three years ago.
It reminded me of a line from the first episode of Buffy.
Giles; “You have to be prepared for anything. There could be a vampire in this very room, and you’d have to be able to spot it.
Buffy looks around…..
Buffy; “There’s one.”
Giles; “What are you sure?”
Buffy; “Are you kidding me, look at those clothes! Get a clue. What is he DeBarge?”
My point is a vampire is a hunter of humans. So naturally they are going to want to blend in with their surroundings. Not stick out like a rubber thumb.
If I was walking around at night and saw a group of people dressed like that in this day and age I’d think “Either they’re vampires, or they’re gonna go shoot some place up. Either way, I ain’t gettin’ near em.”
This movie would have worked three years ago, when Goth was still in. Now it just looks ridiculous and dated to dress like that.
Which is why I think the Matrix 2 didn’t do as well as everyone thought it would have.
My other major gripe is when the huge black dude was wolfing out.
Both times the vamps just stood there and let him do it!
I was like “The large scary black man is getting larger and scarier! Don’t just stand there! Shoot/ whip the piss out of him before he’s done!”
Of course they didn’t.
Last bit of bìŧçhìņg then I’m done.
When you mix a vamp and a wolf you get a smaller, blue dude, who is suppossed to be stronger than both, but was getting his @SS kicked by a vamp.
Small, blue, not as strong as they should be….yep he was a smurf.
On a positive note…I’m really excited about the Res Evil teaser trailer.
Zombies kicking the worlds @SS! Sign me up!
I just saw it yesterday and yeah, ‘underwhelmed’ pretty much sums it up. I’m a big fan of werewolf stories and figured I’d like it no matter what, because really, if you’re going to like werewolf movies you might as well like bad ones since good ones are so rare. Luckily, after seeing it I caught sight of the Howling special edition DVD and picked it up, so it was a good werewolf day anyway.
Still waiting for the “Howling Mad” movie.
I must say that I kind of liked the film….When I watched it I was having a looong day and wanted to veg out. This movie provided that. I didn’t have to think just watch…
Well, as I said already, I enjoyed it.
I was going in with low expectations, and it beat my expectations.
So, really, what more can you say, in that respect? 🙂
I think it’s rather unfair to compare this movie to The Matrix, however. Success is based on opinion, but the movie relied more on story than sfx. It’s something that I wonder whether the folks behind The Matrix (and Star Wars for that matter) have lost sight of.
I really hate the Hollywood thing where two people fall in love because they are both beautiful.
Frankly i just dont see any reason why she would love him.
And anyone with a brain knows who the antagonists for the next two films will be, the two sleeping vampire elders. Snore… Maybe I’ve just been introduced to much more interesting Vampire/Werewolf tales elsewhere
I think I enjoyed this movie more than most here did, even if I agree with some of the flaws.
I think PAD hit it on the nail when he said that because this is Selene’s story, we should have seen more of her life in flashback. At the very least, we should have seen the death of her family and not deal with two dry descriptions of events. It might has also helped develop some chemistry between her and Michael. The other complaint was how virtually all of the vampires did nothing but sit around in a mixture of victorian and goth garb sipping out of crystal goblets. The third complaint was the inconsistancy of the silver weakness of the Lycans. It’s another case of if you’re a spear carrier, you’re dropped quickly, but if your a major player, you survive just about everything.
On the other hand, I thought the color and tone of the movie was handled well. Not a great film, but definitely a 2.5 star movie.
Thanks for discussing the movie!
My biggest point of disapointment with League of Extradinary Genteman was similar to what Peter had to say about this one: There’s no one to feel sympathy for (at least in the first act 20-30 mins or so in the case of LXG). There may be different reasons in this flick, but it comes down to being exposed to a character’s emotional stake or vulenerabilty and believing it.
Good looking people, yeah. But what you got is a video game that you don’t even get to participate in — in my opinion.
The further discussion just confirms it, in my opinion. Thanks, again!
Now I don’t usually waste time defending a movie… especially one that I am not a huge fan of but I did like it. Normally I couldn’t care less if someone else likes a movie or not. Another’s opinion does not change how I feel about something. But I do have differences of opinion/memory as to what actually happened in the movie. Selene’s backstory was told an was told in a way that fit the situation. Had we sen the “true” backstory, the revelation would have been weakened. So we would basically have seen film of Selene standing at a door hearing noises. Ooh, that would’ve been good (sarcasm!). Instead we see how she acts during the retelling. It is the first time she really shows any remnants of human emotion and it starts the build up to her emotional explosion. Plus we see how Michael responds to her backstory. Instead of having the stuff shown and tehn coming back to see her staring of and Michael sitting with his best “Life sucks” face, we watch the transformation. As for the silver thing, it actually was consistent. Just as the vamps vary in strength, so do the lycans. Plus, the “big black wolf” drops the elder blood right next to Lucian… who was waiting for it. Personnaly, I see this as a way to bring Lucian into the sequel. Not to mention that the main drawback from those rounds used (against both species) is taht if the bullets go THRU the person, they have less effect than if they stay in. The modified rounds were to make that less of an issue but seeing as how we see an exit wound on Lucian, I can only assume that the bullet had less of an effect than it should have had. Taht’s my opinion, anyway. And for the “smurfing” of the mixed breeds… I was thankful he didn’t go straight to the blue version but had to go thru his werewolf phase first and then change further. It seems he can actually determine how much of either species he uses. And of course he gets his ášš kicked… he only had strength and speed over Victor… not skill. The guy was not a fighter. Victor had centuries to practice. And Mikey does a pretty fair job mopping the floor with him but gets himself taken down when Victor finally starts fighting him like a beast. When he lets the sword go and just starts fighting Michael, the fight changes. Plus it looked a helluva lot better than that stupid Burley Brawl part in Matrix 2 so all comparisons to Matrix should be silenced. They wore black leather and sunglasses. Last time I checked, neither were invented for Matrix. Blame the X costumes in the Xmen on Matrix and I am sure their were strong encouring words from studio execs to use those types of costumes here. But they looked nice so let it go. And they also used the “ring effect” from LOTR, the wall crawling from Jeepers Creepers, the fast running technique from Planet of the Apes and other “swipes” but I felt they improved on all of them. And her jump (the one in the trailers)… each time they do it…that was nice…finally done right unlike Crouching Tiger and other such crappy wire work. And Noble spoke of the vamps dressing to stand out. Stand out from whom? They did not socialize with humans. They made a point of explaining this. They synthesize plasma and clone blood. Craven tells the Selene backstory by explaining that the “rules” were broken and the vmp went out to “party”. He made it clear this was unacceptable to their society. They liked their life and saw humans as scum. They weren’t even seen as food anymore. Lycans hunted humans…not vampires. And the Lycans dressed like the humans we saw. Now I have to agree with Noble about the whole “big black dude getting bigger and meaner” thing but it is for thematic purposes and usually accompanied by the vamp doing their own “look at me” kind of badass face. I’ve seen too many “tough guys” do the same thing in the opening dance of a fight. They wasn’t the other to backdown or flinch. It’s BS posturing. Mostly, though, it was for show. Anyway, I’ve rambled on long enough. It wasn’t a perfect movie but it was fine cinema. It wasn’t cerebral but I found it well planned. And it didn’t PRETEND to be cerebral like Matrix 2 and what I am sure will be the following knockoffs. Have a good week everyone!
I really liked this movie, but there were a couple of things that bothered me.
One: there are no good or bad sides in this movie. Michael is the only character that doesn’t kill anyone! Peter’s right, they should have told the story from his point of view. Then again, I didn’t mind all those shots of Selene in that catsuit! 🙂
Two: and this is just something I would have done differently. Lycans have a big advantage on vamps in that they can move freely during the day. They established that it is ultraviolet radiation that can kill vamps. They also showed that the lycans knew where the vamps live. Why didn’t the lycans, during the day, storm the mansion with portable SUN LAMPS!? Half an hour, tops, the vamps would be wiped out. Of course, then there wouldn’t be much of a movie, would there?
Here’s a question: If getting bitten by an immortal causes you to get the memories of the biter transferred to you, wouldn’t Selene have gotten the memories of Viktor killing her family?
Even scarier – Lucian(Michael Sheen) turned up last night on TV here in the UK playing Tony Blair in a dramatisation of the events leading up to his election as the Labour Party Leader.
Totally agree with the general opinion of the movie. I also felt that whole chunks of the plot were lifted from the first Blade flick but with the genders reversed – the victim of a bite in both flicks were Doctors, being helped by an immortal who started for fall for them etc etc etc
Ferg
And anyone with a brain knows who the antagonists for the next two films will be, the two sleeping vampire elders. Snore…
Actually, it’ll be the one sleeping elder, Marcus. The rule was, “two asleep, one awake.” Amelia was awake and nearing her naptime and Viktor was awakened. Both were killed.
Why does everything that comes out of a person’s mouth have to bash the Matrix? Why can’t we let a movie stand on its on merits. I personally enjoy the Matrix trilogy and tend to enjoy the story. All this bashing makes me think one thing: WHY DON’T YOU MAKE SOMETHING BETTER? That’s like if I make a superhero book about a guy living in the shadows of his father while struggling with his newfound powers that he goes wacko….oh wait that’s PAD’s story. But anyway what if MY fans started bashing PAD’s work? It would seem very stupid wouldn’t it? Because a movie/comic book inspires someone is no reason to bash the original idea. OK rant over.
The film should have been made like the “Luxura, Vamperotica series by Brainstorm Comics. That was a great Vampire Vs. Werewolf story.By the way, Kate Beckinsale is hot, hotter than that pucker-faced Angelina Jolie.
Call the producers, and see if you can write the two sequels ( I believe one of them is actually a prequel).
You know, if they cast Kate Beckinsale in the next Lara Croft movie, I’d actually go see it this time.
If I was walking around at night and saw a group of people dressed like that in this day and age I’d think “Either they’re vampires, or they’re gonna go shoot some place up. Either way, I ain’t gettin’ near em.”
Oh, don’t worry. They’re all my friends. 🙂
WHY DON’T YOU MAKE SOMETHING BETTER?
For crying out loud.
The Matrix movies are NOT the end-all of movie making or story telling.
They’re good, but they’re not THAT good.
Now, the Lord of the Rings movies… 😉
Why Don’t I make something better?
Give me the cash, creative freedom, and I’ll show you Real movie 😛
I promise not to use lycra costumes, bullet time, have a same sex romance to seem with the times, or any of the other dozens of hollywood cliches that are making the rounds at the time.
I promise not to use lycra costumes, bullet time, have a same sex romance to seem with the times, or any of the other dozens of hollywood cliches that are making the rounds at the time.
Well, then count me out! 🙂
I went to see this on its opening weekend to kill time the day before a Glamourcon in Chicago. My reaction was lukewarm, not bad, not great.
On the other hand, two rows in front of me was a woman who took her daughter with her, the daughter being somewhere around five years old. And then, the mom is surprised when she has to carry the girl screaming from the theater.
Reminds me of when my dad once took me to see THE TINGLER when I was six. (He wanted company.) Seeing the title critter (a big-*ss centipede with huge pincers) saw to it that I didn’t sleep real well that night.
The movie reminded me of Bruce Jones’s run on the Hulk:
confusing, uninteresting, too little werewolf transformations, and a cast of characters you care nothing about.
Re: Kevin Jones and The Matrix.
Why is everyone bashing the Matrix sequels?
Because they’re not that good. Same as the reason a lot of people couldn’t stop talking about the original Matrix because it WAS good. It’s really a simple concept.
Why don’t we make something better?
First, if look at BringBackKirk.com, somebody posting here just might be able to.
Second, it’s a lame line, same as when people criticize sportswriters for not wearing a jock strap. I pay my money to go see movies like the Matrix to be entertained. it’s the writers, actors and producers’ job to this. If they fall short, I can bìŧçh if i want.