First question: Was it better than "Daredevil?" Answer--Yes and no.
Second question: Worth your money? Answer--yes and no.
Here's the bottom line (confusingly, I'm placing it near the top). Bottom line is, THIS is the Marvel movie that Ang Lee should have directed. This is the movie that sought to have a dreamlike quality to it, with amazing aerial kung fu acrobatics and extended battle scenes that should leave you breathless.
But the script and director didn't deliver that. I don't know whether it was lack of time, lack of budget, lack of ability, or a combination thereof, but it just wasn't there.
It held my attention, I'll give it that. I didn't fall asleep or get bored and mentally wander off and watch "Casablanca" in my head, which is what I do with films that aren't grabbing me. Then again--sorry, purely personal thing--I'm a sucker for Jennifer Garner, and she was in practically every scene. Indeed, the few scenes she wasn't in were the ones where my attention did start to wander until she came back.
Even with my fondness for the actress, I am forced to admit that, to use the words of Dorothy Parker, she ran the emotional gamut from A to B. The story, such as it is, involves Elektra protecting a desirable young martial arts prodigy from the clutches of the Hand (no pun intended.) If you want to see a top notch film about a deadly woman protecting a young charge, go watch Gena Rowlands in "Gloria."
People were coming out of the film wondering why Elektra felt inspired to protect the girl. The answer to that is actually in the script, pretty clearly. It's not even subtext; it's subtle as a brick. Elektra sees much of herself in the girl and wants to try and keep her out of the clutches of the Hand so that the girl won't turn out like Elektra. In saving the girl, Elektra would be in some measure saving herself. Which might kinda sorta track if, say, Elektra had once actually been IN the Hand and the Hand had made her the way she was. Since she wasn't and they didn't and we're not entirely sure why she is the way she is, we're left with no touchstone or frame of reference. Garner is a good actress, but she doesn't seem capable of bringing layers, shading and meanings that aren't in the page. What she sees is what you get. So when people are wondering "why" she would care, it's not because the script doesn't explain, but because Garner doesn't convey enough passion about what's in the script to make it believable, mostly because Garner doesn't get to act the key motivational scenes, but instead experience them in flashback to when she was a child. So she's distanced, we're distanced, and Garner doesn't have the chops to make the jump and link us emotionally with the girl she was and the woman she is.
The places where the film really kick starts is anything with Terrance Stamp as Stick. I'd always seen stick more as a Burgess Meredith type, but Meredith is dead, and anyway Terrance brings his own stamp to the role (okay, THAT pun was intended) and invests all his scenes with such authority that--even though his part is even more underwritten than Garner's--you don't care.
Better than Daredevil? Well, yes in the sense that it's not relentlessly depressing and wasn't edited with a salad shooter (although I seem to be the only person on the planet who liked Ben Affleck as Matt Murdock). But no in that "Daredevil" had an okay villain in the Kingpin and an incredible villain in Bullseye. "Elektra" screamed for a bad guy with the sass and swagger of Colin Farrell. (At one point a group of Hand operatives, clad in civvies, shows up on their way to try and kill Elektra's charges, and I swear to God, one of them looked so familiar--in shaggy black hair, sunglasses and black leather jacket--that I actually said out loud, "Good Lord, the Hand is sending in Neil Gaiman." Which got some laughs from nearby, but now that I think on it, I believe Neil would actually make a crackerjack movie villain, and he might want to look into it if the whole writing thing doesn't work out for him.)
Instead there's something like five major bad guys, each of whom are only as interesting as the special effects that accompanies them or their powers (although fanboys are gonna go nuts for the thirty second sequence of Typhoid sucking face with Elektra for no reason other than to provoke fan boys into going nuts). Having five times the assassins that "Daredevil" had doesn't make the film five times as interesting. Hell, I'd've been happy to see Elektra have a throw down with someone on par with Crispin Glover's screaming looney from the "Charlie's Angels" films.
So it's worth your money if you're seeing it at matinee prices, and it's worth it for Terrance Stamp. If I'd paid matinee prices to see it, I'm come out feeling it wasn't the best film I'd ever seen, but worth the investment of time and money. Your opinion will probably vary based upon how big fans you are of Frank Miller, Jennifer Garner and Terrance Stamp. And red leather and lesbian kissing scenes.
Oh, as we emerged from the theater, we were greeted with huge posters advertising the film of Frank Miller's "Sin City." Now THAT looks interesting.
PAD
Posted by Peter David at January 14, 2005 12:48 AM | TrackBack | Other blogs commentingFor what it's worth I thought Ben afleck was a really good DareDevil. I just thought the story was slow.
Ian
thanks PAD
i had my doubts about this one
so i decided to just go to see jennfer and terrence and definitely during the day
so guess my heads in the right place
it would have been great if the studio were thinking about making it another crouching tiger
after all why couldnt elektra be as good as that film with a combination of the right story and the right fight chroeography?
not to mention the right villains
No real interest in Elektra. In comics or on the screen. Not a fan of Garner either. So this will probably be a "wait for HBO" thing with me.
Which is a far bit better than the "not on the threat of death" thing I have with Catwoman.
And I though Affleck was fine as DD. It's the same problem as Clooney hadas Batman: good actors, great for the roles, but both in horrible, horrible movies. Although I admit, as much as I hated Daredevil, it wasn't "makes the baby jesus weep" bad as Batman & Robin.
'it wasn't "makes the baby jesus weep" bad as Batman & Robin."
Dude, at least YOU didn't see "Batman and Robin" at a special private screening for DC staffers and guest. I'll never forget the moment Batman whipped out the Bat Mastercard, and someone behind me screamed like a lost soul howling its agony from the pit of the damned. It was Denny O'Neil. What a blood-curdling sound THAT was.
PAD
Your flexible friend, don't leave home without it.
Ian
"Dude, at least YOU didn't see "Batman and Robin" at a special private screening for DC staffers and guest. I'll never forget the moment Batman whipped out the Bat Mastercard, and someone behind me screamed like a lost soul howling its agony from the pit of the damned. It was Denny O'Neil. What a blood-curdling sound THAT was."
I remember seeing Batman and Robin in the theater and by 10 minutes in thinking Batman wasn't the only one not around when you needed them... what about Mike, Joel, Tom and Crow.
Neither of the multi-screen Cinemas in my town are showing Elektra this week, which is a bad sign. I'll probably go see it if it gets here in a few weeks, I'd planned to go tonight, but will now choose between White Noise and Team America.
You know, it would almost be worth sitting through that movie (I don't think I've ever made it through the whole thing) just to see Denny O'Neil's reaction to it...
You know there are two movie sneak previews in the history of cinema I wish I could have been at (And will once science perfects a time machine and I steal it...)- the surprise sneak preview of GONE WITH THE WIND with an unsuspecting audience that reportedly went bannanas and the screening of BATMAN AND ROBIN for DC employees who were, I am sure, equally unsuspecting, but not in a good way...
Thanks a lot for the review. It was the most positive review I've read for this movie and yet I still think it's going to suck. I'm a big fan of lesbian scenes and Garner's ass is hot, but I usually want an actual story in my movies. Ah, well... I sat through Catwoman and lived, I'll make it through this, too.
Frank Miller's "Sin City" is what I'm waiting to see!!! I dunno why the fanboys/girls aren't talking this up as much as the other stuff. :(
Actually Neil Gaiman did play the villain (I think), vocally at least, in the deservedly forgotten Archangel Thunderbird.
A friend of mine mentioned that the teaser trailer for The Fantastic Four (or whatever the official title is) will be shown exclusively, at least at first, with Elektra. (He could be wrong.)
Sometimes I can't stand when they pull tricks like that...
Had no interest in seeing it (and probably still won't, time not being what it once was) until I saw the trailer, which looked interesting. I've always seen Terence Stamp as Stick, by the way. Burgess would have been... weird. Never cared for Elektra, didn't think much of her in the DD movie (which, holes and all, I really liked. Afflack didn't bother me too much - he doesn't play blind very well... blind folks don't hold their head rigid, but tend to wag it lightly for better sound pickup. Much better than any of the Batman movies -- none of them were watchable, IMO).
After watching Daredevil the day it came out, I realized my face was hurting when the movie was over. Then I figured out that it was because I had been smiling for 90 minutes straight. That's how much I enjoyed Daredevil. I thought it did justice to the character.
I saw Batman and Robin at the dollar theater and I was so pissed that I wasted that dollar on that movie instead of spending it on a scratch-off lottery ticket. Worst movie in the history of, um... movie history. Ever. I dare you to find a worse movie.
Well, I really liked Daredevil, so I'm sure to go and see this too.
Has anybody seen the new Director's Cut of Daredevil? I picked it up, and I liked it a lot more than the regular version..quite a few plot holes were explained, as well as some new scenes. Plus there's a new sub-story in which Foggy plays a bigger role.
Worth a look!
Lou
Well, I really liked Daredevil, so I'm sure to go and see this too.
Has anybody seen the new Director's Cut of Daredevil? I picked it up, and I liked it a lot more than the regular version..quite a few plot holes were explained, as well as some new scenes. Plus there's a new sub-story in which Foggy plays a bigger role.
Worth a look!
Lou
Well, just to throw my two coppers in, I also liked Ben as Daredevil. The film was far from perfect (hell, even the writer/director cops to that), but it was enjoyable, and I think they got the feel of the comics right, if not the facts. (And I also agree that the Director's Cut is MUCH better. Go check it out if you're so inclined...)
That said, I'll be seeing Elektra this weekend, though I won't really be expecting much. I'm essentially going to see the very beautiful Jennifer Garner, and that's about it. Terrence Stamp (not so beautiful) will simply be an added bonus.
Well, I liked Afffleck as Murdock but not as Daredevil. He didn't have the right moves for the character (no slam against him...he probably didn't have the year-and-a-half to do enough martial arts training to look natural at it).
I didn't like Garner in the DD movie, so I'm going to give this one a miss, too.
I'll probably see ELEKTRA as a matinee this week, but it's nothing I'm frothing at the bit for. I'm hoping for some good action scenes, but not much more.
In what's almost false advertising, the current issue of STUFF (which I beleve THE DAILY SHOW once described as "the magazien for readers who find MAXIM too cerebral") has this tag: "ELEKTRA SHOCK! Inside! Natassia Malthe Locks Lips With Jennifer Garner!" Alas, the mag only has Natassia *talking* about the kiss -- no pictures, dude.
(Personally, I wish people who went so nuts over two women kissing, or full-frontal nudity, would just watch porn. You see a lot more action, it's not gratituous (let's be honest, Halle Berry could just have easily worn a bikini top in SWORDFISH), you're a lot more able to forgive a bad story, and you don't sit through over 90 minutes of a movie for a 5-secodn thrill.)
"Oh, as we emerged from the theater, we were greeted with huge posters advertising the film of Frank Miller's "Sin City." Now THAT looks interesting."
I saw the two minute trailer on E!'s Coming Attractions. Sin City looks totally stunning, I'm just praying it has a decent plot it in.
I would have loved to have seen the private screening of Fantastic Four that Marvel had. Let's face it, if the Corman version is that campy, I really, really want to sit through it.
Re: Sin City - It's being co-directed by Miller & Tarintino. If that doesn't put it on your must-see list, I don't know what will.
They don't have Tarintino down as director, but look at the list of stars, including Jessica Albe, Bruce Willis & Micket Rourke.
You know, I must be the only straight guy on the planet who doesn't understand what it is about two women kissing that gets other men all hot and bothered. I mean, the only thing that's more stupid are the guys who get off on seeing their girl with another guy. In my mind, people who think like that are candidates for a Darwin Award.
Alas, I don't watch Alias and Garner's work in Daredevil didn't really light any fires under me either. I'm going to have to give this one a "wait until out on video" pass.
Well, PAD, Marveldom assembled must be having a field day with this one. Have you looked at rottentomatoes.com? Out of the 46 reviews posted so far for "Elektra," only one is a positive one. It's got a Tomatometer rating of 2%. Keeping things in perspective, "Catwoman" had 160 reviews, 15 positive, earning a rating of 9%. From reviews alone, it would appear that Marvel's coughing up the bigger hairball.
Not to worry--I'm STILL seeing it this evening with friends. (O fragile sanity, where hast thou gone?)
Can't recommend the DD Director's Cut enough.
And to the person wondering if "Sin City" is going to have a good plot: from what I understand, the movie is filmed versions of the first few Sin City comic stories, shot-for-shot. Think about that one for a minute. And, yes, Robert Rodriguez, Quentin Tarantino, and Frank Miller, directors all.
I've also heard that the FF trailer bites the big one. Sad...are we entering the "Batman & Robin" era of Marvel movies? Darn, it's been so long, I thought for sure that the inimitable style of "Howard the Duck" had been forgotten!
~G.
The last badly-reviewed movie I saw was Van Helsing. My thinking was that every review I read blasted the film essentially because they didn't remain true to the Old Hollywood depictions of the monster characters.
As if those films were ever really faithful to the original fictional versions?
Anyway, VH was a great old 80s rock band...errr, sorry, was a fun action movie romp that didn't ask too much, and neither did I.
Somehow, I ask more from my comic movies. I like Hulk. I like Daredevil, theatrical version. I'd like to see the director's cut, but have to wait for a buddy to get it on Netflix.
I passed on The Punisher and Catwoman. Catwoman because I'm a big 90s Batfamily fan, and didn't want to see anything that wasn't based on the real Selina Kyle. I didn't care for Pfeiffer's version in Batman Rerturns, but I also pretty much view that whole set of films as Elseworlds tales.
So I'll probably pass on Elektra. I haven't read the source material, although I know the story. It just doesn't look that interesting, and I'd rather send Marvel's film execs the message that I want to see interesting movies rather than comic based movies. And for the most part, both X and S films, along with Hulk and Daredevil, have been interesting and entertaining. Maybe if Elektra starts showing better word-of-mouth review, I'll take an interest.
Michael Brunner wrote...
Re: Sin City - It's being co-directed by Miller & Tarintino. If that doesn't put it on your must-see list, I don't know what will.
I believe Miller isn't actually doing any directing for the film. As I understand it, Rodriguez had to fight to get Miller the co-credit - in fact, I believe he had to resign from the director's guild to do it. Pretty upstanding of him.
I haven't heard anything about Tarantino since the initial rumours surfaced long ago. Can you confirm for me that he is, in fact, directing a segment of the movie?
I really liked Daredevil. I think its one of the best Marvel films. Ya, Spiderman 2 is THE best so far, but Daredevil is ONE of the best of the Marvel movies, imo.
Ben Affleck, imo, was great as Matt Murdock and really good as Daredevil. He had both roles down pretty good (especially Matt. He was the perfect Matt, imo).
I also really liked Jennifer Garner as Elektra. I thought she did really good in the Daredevil movie. I really want to see Elektra. I think it'll be a good movie. I also think it'll be a movie that I'll like alot or at least think is good movie and most people will prob think its ok or horrible.
Guess I should be used to that by now. I like the Hulk and Daredevil movies quiete a bit.
DF2506
" Spiderman 2 is, imo, THE best though. Wow. What a movie. I hope Fanastic Four is as great or better! "
I'm going to have to chime in as one of those who also loved Daredevil, and I've been looking forward to this movie, but whether or not I'll manage to really enjoy it remains to be seen.
The problem is, I finally gave in to online peer pressure and started watching Alias two weeks ago. By which I mean I bought three seasons of Alias and consumed two and a half of them in two weeks. I'm not sure I'm capable of seeing Jennifer Garner as anything but Sydney Bristow right now.
I fear I'll watch the whole movie thinking that Syd's in some really elaborate undercover op, and wondering why Marshall didn't give her cooler tech.
Didn't love Daredevil, but I distinctly remember watching it and realizing, with some surprise, that I was enjoying it.
Hmmm I thought the guy in the jacket and glasses was Frank Miller doing a cameo. Whn I relazied it was not I thought of Neil. I cannot think Neil as villian though. He just too nice.
I also liked the Daredevil movie and ben Afflek in it. Neeed to check out the director's cut.
I just saw it. It was fun. Then again I am sucker for Jennifer Graner too :).
All I can remember from "Batman & Robin" was someone in the audience standing up and shouting at the top of their lungs "THAT'S THE BIGGEST FREAKIN' DIME STORE INDIAN I'VE EVER SEEN!!!" during one of the gratuitous pans of Gotham City's goofball skyline. I've repressed the rest.
Didn't enjoy "DareDevil" that much, though I didn't *not* like it; I guess it was passable. I'll probably see "Elektra" just to be a completist.
-That OTHER John Byrne
Jeff -
I don't have a scourse handy about Tarintino, I just remember reading about it. As for Miller, he's listed on IMDB as a director, but with "post-production" written after it. Don't know any more than that.
Here's Millers IMDB entry:
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0588340/
Turns out he's also in the Directors cut of daredevil.
kingbobb: "The last badly-reviewed movie I saw was Van Helsing. My thinking was that every review I read blasted the film essentially because they didn't remain true to the Old Hollywood depictions of the monster characters."
You know, I went into Van Helsing pretty much expecting it to be not much more that a good reason to have some popcorn and suck down a Dr. Pepper. And I was right. I did however come away impressed with the portrayal of Frankenstein's monster (you know, the one that too many people just call "Frankenstein") I liked that his motivation was to just be left alone.
As for Electra... I'll be waiting for it to air on a network. Something tells me I'll need the comercial breaks.
No plans to see "Elektra" at present, but I do havd a "Daredevil" question. I recently saw a director's cut DVD of that film at Best Buy (which apparently has a subplot excised from the film about Matt Murdock and a client). Has anyone seen this version? Does it improve the theatrical version, or were those scenes better left on the cutting room floor?
Rick
Can't recommend the DD Director's Cut enough.
Did they remove Affleck from it? That's the only way I'll see it.
Finally saw DD on cable and couldn't turn away...the same way the wife & I couldn't turn away from Battlefield Earth...it was just that bad to us. 'Course, I'm not particularly a fan of Affleck's, and was thus pre-disposed to disliking his performance. (Truth be told, I think the "Affleck as Daredevil" action figure is a better actor than the flesh-and-blood Affleck.)
But, it - and Battlefield Earth still weren't as bad as Batman and Robin. In then-27 years of watching movies, including college as a film major, no movie before (or since) has made me want to get up and leave the theatre. The only reason I didn't was because I wasn't the one who drove that day.
I saw the director's cut - It was worthwhile for the additional very funny verbal sparring between Matt and Foggy, and more courtroom time. The plot made a little more sense, but I didn't think the plot of the theatrical version was that full of holes (the new cut gets Daredevil first involved with Kingpin more directly through the courtroom). Coolio was fun, but didn't do much in the movie. It didn't really solve my original problem with the film (which I very much liked despite the flaw) which was that by moving the Elektra arc completely to the present, the Elektra story lost resonance, and became less believable (this was made worse by the fact that the decision seemed so arbitrary).
Todd
I thought Afflek was good as Murdock, too.
I thoght that "Daredevil" was a very hard film to watch, because I was constantly having to look all over the place, to make sure I didn't trip on any dropped premises, or fall into any plot holes.
And the last ten minutes were, for lack of a more appropriate way of putting it, really dumb.
Living in Queens -as opposed to Manhattan - I live near theaters that have matinee prices. Thanks for the advice, PAD.
Mark James
I saw Batman and Robin at the dollar theater and I was so pissed that I wasted that dollar on that movie instead of spending it on a scratch-off lottery ticket. Worst movie in the history of, um... movie history. Ever. I dare you to find a worse movie.
Space Mutiny. It was a really bad early '80s sci-fi flick, so gratuitously cheap and horrid it ripped off SFX sequences from Prattlestar Galaxative- er, I mean Battlestar Galactica. It was so bad, even Joel and the robots couldn't save it! (I know - I watched them try.)
I will probably see it cause I loves me some Jennifer Garner.As far as DD,upon further review i didnt hate it but.......Affleck as DD didnt work for me.I think i only like him in Kevin Smith movies.The movie had certain touches i liked ,him sleeping in a sensory deprivation tank
as an example ,but other elements just fell flat.
I had a bigger issue with How Bullseye was portayed,a little too over the top for me .Personally i would have cast Neal McDonough in the part,with Matt Damon or Ed Norton as Daredevil. The sound track got me hooked on Evanescence so i cant complain too much.How hot Did Jennifer Garner look training in
DD to kick Affleck's ass???Sin City looks cool and
any flick with Bruce Willis,and Micheal madsen in it ...I am so there.
I have to agree with others about DareDevil, I liked Ben Affleck in it. I thought he was really good at it. Jennifer Garner was good as Elektra, but I didn't really like Colin Farrell in it.
Good movie though, intend to see Electra at some point, probably not this weekend though. Will Yun Lee has been one of my favorite actors since Witchblade.
I don't really give a whole lot of credit to online interviewers. I tend to like most of the movies they give C-s and 2 stars to and hate the ones they give As and 4s...
Ra!
"Dude, at least YOU didn't see "Batman and Robin" at a special private screening for DC staffers and guest. I'll never forget the moment Batman whipped out the Bat Mastercard, and someone behind me screamed like a lost soul howling its agony from the pit of the damned. It was Denny O'Neil. What a blood-curdling sound THAT was."
I can only imagine that moment of genuine emotion and drama from poor ol' Denny would've made the movie BETTER.
Man, I hope the new Bat-flick is good.....but I guess the Bat-bar's set pretty low at this point.
"I've also heard that the FF trailer bites the big one. Sad...are we entering the "Batman & Robin" era of Marvel movies?"
I wouldn't say it bites...but it doesn't inspire great hope that the film will be very good.
It looks...ordinary. And when you have the word "fantastic" in your title, ordinary just won't cut it.
For me, the movie was lost when Dr Doom was transformed from the leader of Latveria to...hang on to your hats folks!--an evil businessman! Wow! THAT hasn't been beaten to death! How are we supposed to respect the heroes when they are going 4 on 1 against Donald Trump with a bad skin disorder?
I'll read the paperback, which will doubtlessly have some clever dialogue at least.
Poor Denny. :(
The worst movie I ever saw in a theatre was "The Haunting" with Catherine Zeta Jones.
Only saw this film because "The Sixth Sense" was sold out.
Steve Chung
Just got back from seeing Elektra. And I really enjoyed it. It wasn't spectacular, by any means, but it was good fun and I got pretty much what I expected.
As for the FF trailer before it, THAT I really liked! Before the trailer, except for Jessica Alba (who's SMOKIN' hot), I was skeptical of the movie. And, yes, trailers can be deceiving. But I, for one, am now really looking forward to the movie.
I thought that Ben Affleck played a fine Matt Murdock and Daredevil (although I always imagined Daredevil to look more badass) and that Kingpin was portrayed excelently.
I'm pleased to hear that Stick is appropriately badass.
I saw Batman and Robin at the dollar theater and I was so pissed that I wasted that dollar on that movie instead of spending it on a scratch-off lottery ticket. Worst movie in the history of, um... movie history. Ever. I dare you to find a worse movie.
Sweet Sweetback's Baadasssss Song.
And yes, that's how it's spelled.
Sweet Sweetback's Baadasssss Song...I liked it. Way ahead of its time, great soundtrack, some nicely surreal cinematography...now GODMONSTER OF INDIAN FLATS, there's a bad movie. or SLAPSTICK OF ANOTHER KIND. Or SOUL VENGEANCE although that one at least has the single most amazing plot development about 3/4 of the way through...
Among the worst movies ever:
DUNGEONS & DRAGONS (not only awful for being a movie D&D fans waited over 2 decades to see, but also because the writers claimed it took years for them to write)
CATWOMAN: Take away the (admittedly admirable) sight of Halle Berry in the skimpiest Catwoman outfit to date, and there's absolutely no other reason to watch this.
CHARLIE'S ANGELS: A movie wallowing in camp.
FLESH AND BONE: In addition to being terminally dull, this movie gave away its "surprise" twist by having it about two characters in a movie with only 5 main characters.
And, for the MST3K fans...
PUMAMAN: Hands down, this is the worst superhero movie ever. Worst costume (tan slacks???), worst powers (pumas can't fly and teleport), worst sidekick (an Aztec who's cooler than the hero), worst nemesis (Donald Pleasance, who at one point turns up wearing what really looks like a dress). But at least it's my favorite MST3K episode!
And generally considered the worst movie shown on MST3K [drumroll please]
MANOS: THE HANDS OF FATE. When doing a horror movie, don't have the first 10 or 20 minutes be shots of boring countryside. Don't have the "monster" be a slow guy with fat knees and a speech impediment. Don't use a foreign word for the same word in English ("Aqua: The Water of Doom"). And if Joel,Crow, and Tom Servo aren't on screen too, don't watch MANOS: THE HANDS OF FATE.
Torgo, take me away!
If you want to see a top notch film about a deadly woman protecting a young charge, go watch Gena Rowlands in "Gloria."
I loved that movie, Gena Rowlands kicked all kinds of mobster butt in that. And on the subject of really bad movies that can compare with Batman & Robon, well I can point you towards the remake of Gloria starring Sharon Stone. A worse movie you may never see.
I saw Batman and Robin at the dollar theater and I was so pissed that I wasted that dollar on that movie instead of spending it on a scratch-off lottery ticket. Worst movie in the history of, um... movie history. Ever. I dare you to find a worse movie.
Soul Man. Need I say more?
The only movie to ever make me so angry I wanted to hunt down and torture those responsable: Swimming Pool. Someone deserved to be maimed for that one.
I actually kinda liked Daredevil. Won't be seeing Elektra though, maybe for the Fantastic Four trailer.
I'm amazed nobody's mentioned Highlander 2 as one of the Worst Movies Ever.
"There Should Have Been Only One!"
>>>> saw Batman and Robin at the dollar theater and I was so pissed that I wasted that dollar on that movie instead of spending it on a scratch-off lottery ticket. Worst movie in the history of, um... movie history. Ever. I dare you to find a worse movie.
Hey, an EASY one. Speed 2! Good cast, HORRIBLE script and concept. STUPID, STUPID movie.
Tim
As long as people are listing their worst movies ever, I at last have a candidate:
NAKED SPACE
Leslie Nielsen stars in it, as was prominently featured on the cover of the used DVD my son and I bought. We figured it's be NAKED GUN in space, or some such.
Also stars Patrick MacNee (THE PRISONER, THE AVENGERS), and Cindy Williams (Shirley from LAVERNE AND SHIRLEY).
The only time it lived up to my expectations was when the alien sings. For the rest of the time, it was a slow SF story, with bits you thought were supposed to be funny, only you weren't laughing....
Just avoid it - or, if you don't want to do that, you can have my copy....
RD Francis
Wait! Wait I 've got it! Battle Beyond the Stars (1980) starred Richard Thomas, Robert Baughn, and George Peppard just to name a few. It was definitely trying to feed into the Star Wars phenomena.
What's so funny to me is that Robert Vaughn practically did a reprise of the role in the late 90's on an episode of the second Kung Fu series.
Sadly, Ben Affleck takes a lot of flack and joking by people even though he's generally a very good actor. And I liked him as Matt Murdock.
You know, I must be the only straight guy on the planet who doesn't understand what it is about two women kissing that gets other men all hot and bothered. I mean, the only thing that's more stupid are the guys who get off on seeing their girl with another guy. In my mind, people who think like that are candidates for a Darwin Award.>>
One of my male co-workers gave an explanation once about why some men like to watch two women make out: it was because women know what women like in bed. In other words, if one of the women likes a paticular 'trick' done with her, the guy will take notes and think 'wonder if my girlfriend/wife would like it if I did something similar with her?'
Hey, I said it was an explanation. I didn't say it was a very good one. :)
As for Battle Beyond the Stars, I thought it would have been loads better if it wasn't edited with a salad shooter. Mind you, it wouldn't have been an enduring classic or anything, but it could have been much better than what they released in the theaters.
Chris
One of my male co-workers gave an explanation once about why some men like to watch two women make out: it was because women know what women like in bed. In other words, if one of the women likes a paticular 'trick' done with her, the guy will take notes and think 'wonder if my girlfriend/wife would like it if I did something similar with her?'
By god, that's absolutely brilliant! Instead of asking my girlfriend or wife what she likes , I'll coerce her into having sex with a woman so I can take notes.
Must be the reason why some guys like to watch their girlfriends have sex with other guys too. To take notes on technique.
Ladies and gentlmen, the Darwin Awards for sex goes to... heterosexual males.
Well you can count me in the group of straight males who don't get the attraction so many have for lesbian scenes. It's always the part in a porno movie I fast forward through...I mean, the part I WOULD fast forward through if I WATCHED those things which I certainly DON'T and...and..um...I'll be over here...
Re: Battle Beyond The Stars
You know, I actually remember George Peppard in that move, in a baddly written immitation of Han Solo flying in and shooting Vader off Skywalkers tale, saying, "...Space Cowboy, from the planet Earth" with far too much gusto. Whoever gave that movie the green light should be forced to watch it for a week straight.
Re: Highlander 2
"The Planet Zeist." Zeist? Zeist. To this day I'm convinced that 'Zeist' is that foamy stuff what sits on top of your beer.
I often wonder what lowest common denominator makes these decisions. There should be a new item in the credits of all movies: "If this fild sucks, redefines stupid, or otherwise doesn't live up to the hype call so-and-so at (inser the schmucks phone number)."
Oh, and on the subject of porn...
I haven't watched a porn film since the advent of the DVD. The last thing I want is the Special Widescreen Directors Unrated Platinum Series Edition with 26 hours of never before seen, extra, behinds the scenes, oooohOOOooh we did it with computers, "The Making Of" featurette, bonus material, but you have to click on the leading lady's left tit in the Extra Features sub-menu in the "Commentary" section after turning off the sub-titles. In French.
After all that I wouldn't even care about the two women.
Although, wouldn't the director and (snicker) "writer's" commenmtary be a hoot on a porn DVD? I mean, what would the writer be able to say? "Yeah, here I was trying to convey the inherent human conflict of a women who has ordered a pizza but doesn't have the money to pay for it."
And the director could fill us in on the wacky behind the scene stories "Originally we were going to go with a trained Donkey in this scene but he got busted on the way in from Tiajuana when they discovered 12 condoms full of cocaine in his stomach. Turned out he was a mule. So we went with Ron Jeremy and the actress was so drunk she couldn't tell the difference. You'd think she would have noticed the extra body hair."
Actually, this all sounds pretty entertaining...
And I'm gonna defend BATTLE BEYOND THE STARS!. It had Sybil Danning in an impossibly skimpy outfit! Not too shabby! It's got a John Sayles script that rips off THE SEVEN SAMURAI! It has a really nice James Horner score and special effects by future King of the World James Cameron! Did I mention Sybil Danning's outfit? The special effects were so much better than anything else that Corman had ever produced that he has reused them in almost everu movie he has made since.
Interestingly (well, to me) the title was also used as an alternate for THE GREEN SLIME. Now THERE was a piece of crap, though it did have a snappy them song and was directed by the genius who later made the brilliant BATTLE ROYALE.
On bad movies: Although it's in the category of "so bad it's good," the worst movie ever made goes to "Plan 9 from Outer Space." You've gotta admire Ed Wood giving top billing to Bela Lugosi when he's dead before shooting begins, and splices in home video footage of Lugosi walking around in a cape. Not to mention literally cardboard sets and props.
On Gaiman: How about a film version of Sandman? Although it would be cool to see Gaiman as a villain, I don't think it'd ever happen. Unless PAD got some momentum for something along the lines of "Comic Book: The Movie."
Chris
Bill:
And I'm gonna defend BATTLE BEYOND THE STARS!. It had Sybil Danning in an impossibly skimpy outfit! Not too shabby! It's got a John Sayles script that rips off THE SEVEN SAMURAI! It has a really nice James Horner score and special effects by future King of the World James Cameron! Did I mention Sybil Danning's outfit?
Dude, come on. It had John Saxon in it. If they could have just gotten William Shatner, they would have had every over-actor in Hollywood at the time. Well, okay, I'm generalizing. Not EVERY over-actor.
BTW: Speaking of Cowboy Pete, Pad, are you planning to add Battlestar Galactica to your Cowboy Pete Roundups? I'd love to know what you think of the new show. If you've mentioned it in the past, sorry, I must have missed it.
So far I really only have two bones of contention with it. I hate that that made Starbuck a woman, and aside from one lone black woman on the Galactica the black race on Caprica is now extinct. Guess Richard Pryor was right.
eclark,
Even as I type this I'm watching the Battlestar Galactica marathon on SciFi. Me likey.
Yeah, this would be a great addition to Cowboy Pete.
Bill,
Yeah, i was just posting on the SciFi .com BSG board and they had a pict of a future episode that showed a pilots briefing. Lots of minorities represented their, so now I'm just mad that Starbuck is a basically just a nicely shaped man with tits. Why the hell do they do that to women? Why couldn't she be more like B5's Ivanova?
Ed,
My wife had the exact same complaint. It didn't bother her that Starbuck was now a woman but that she was pretty much the same character. So what's the point?
I have more of a problem with the whole "Cylons that are so much like humans that you can't tell them apart" idea. If they are making themselves like us down to the molecules why bother hating us? Even if we ARE primitive, I mean, if I get a nice shiney cyborg body I'm not going to start abusing my toaster.
Also, a whole episode looking for water? I'm no atronomer, though, heh, I teach it, but isn't the universe pretty much FULL of the stuff?
Well, it's full of hydrogen anyway. Finding the combination of hydrogen and oxygen doesn't seem to be a small task. Just take our own solar system for example. So far, the only known source of water is Earth. In fact, methane seems to be more plentiful. Still I suspect that if Earth has water and Earth came from the same place as all the other polanets, they have water as well.
this was posted up earlier and I thought I'd address it. I believe that Robert Rodriguez, the director of Sin city, wrote the score for Kill Bill two for only, and only charged tarentino one dollar. In return Tarentino directed one scene of Sin City for Rodreguez and only charged one dollar for the work.
The girl on girl action being discussed, it's hot when two attractive women make out. It's hot when two attractive men make out. It's hot when an attractive man makes out with an attractive woman. It's just hot when two attractive people couple. Anyone who says different (though entitled to their own opinion) is rejecting a very base part of their humanity and sexuality.
And finally. I would agree that Daredevil is in fact one of the worst movies i've ever seen, but surprisingly I don't think it has anything to do with Afflec. Afflec really cares about the character and you can see that in his performance. It's the rest of the movie that treats it like crap. The story was horrendous full of holes, and takes the worst part of the comic book and put in on screen, horrible directing, visually boring and derivative (excetp for daredevil's "vision" that was cool), and has a soundtrack with a shelf life of one minute.
Anyway, that's just me. You decide.
Would Daredevil have been a better movie if they had started off small with his origin and used the likes of Stilt-Man, Eel, Mr. Fear, and Purple Man, then worked their way up to the likes of Bullseye and the Kingpin?
Would it have hurt to have had Karen Page instead of Elektra?
Steve Chung
eclarke, you missed the idea/point by just a tad. The guy does not get his girl/wife to have sex with another woman and take notes, he watches two other women doing it, take notes, and then goes home and suprises his sweetie with a new trick he's 'heard' about. At least I think that was the general idea behind this co-worker's thoughts.
And in case you were wondering, this guy is around 21 years old. Which may explain some of it. . . . .
Chris
"Just take our own solar system for example. So far, the only known source of water is Earth."
Actually, I'm pretty sure that it's more accurate to say that the Earth is the only known source of LIQUID water. Mars has ice as do comets and some of the other moons and planets. I'm assuming the Galactican's high tech know-how includes the process of melting. :)
"It's just hot when two attractive people couple. Anyone who says different (though entitled to their own opinion) is rejecting a very base part of their humanity and sexuality."
Oh great, now we have people telling us what is hot for them is hot for us or we are living in denial. Wonderful. Care to clue me in on my favorite color while you're at it?
Actually, I'm pretty sure that it's more accurate to say that the Earth is the only known source of LIQUID water. Mars has ice as do comets and some of the other moons and planets. I'm assuming the Galactican's high tech know-how includes the process of melting.
Well, you do realize that water isn't the only liquid that can freeze to ice, right. Methane, for example, can freeze. Hydrogen, itself can freeze, as well as nitrogen. and all three have a liquid state.
I personally did not like Ben Affleck as Daredevil. He has the acting capabilites of plywood.
I'm not much of a Jennifer Garner fan either. She too has the acting capabilities of plywood.
Did I just repeat myself? Anyways...
I haven't seen Elektra yet, but my friends and PAD seem to share the same views of the film, so I just might check it out.
Yeah, I know that other things can freeze (the martian ice caps are mostly frozen CO2) but I'm pretty sure that ice is plentiful in the solar system.
Anyway, they should be able to synthesize H2O from the hydrogen and oxygen, being as they have faster than light travel and all...then again, I would have thought they'd have evolved beyond suit and ties so what do I know?
WE DON'T NEED ANOTHER SUPERHERO
* out of *****
ONE out of FIVE
A movie with assassins and ninjas battling it out could be rife with
pop entertainment possibilities and a healthy serving of
ultraviolence. Assassins and ninjas are inherently pretty cool and
one would have to screw up pretty royally to make the concept suck.
Yet it has happened and this disaster is called Elektra.
A spin off of the Daredevil movie (yet without a single mention of
Daredevil present), Elektra may just represent the nadir of Marvel
Comics movie adaptations. It's lifeless, at times incomprehensible,
not enough bloodletting for a movie about assassins and ninjas and
sometimes outright laughable. This isn't Spider-Man 2, that's for
darn sure.
Elektra begins with her wiping out some generic thugs in a bloodless
manner, devoid of any violence or impact. The best thing about this
bit is Jason Isaacs playing her intended target, and that's only
because the British born actor does a great American accent. If
you're noticing an accent, then the movie is in trouble.
After a weak opening the movie proceeds to move at a snail's pace with
Elektra moping around a cottage. This gives Garner a chance to pout,
just in case you don't see enough of that each week on Alias. (We do
get some nice shots of Garner in a binki or Garner in hip hugger jeans
during these scenes) Eventually she meets her next door neighbors, a
brooding single dad and his spunky daughter, Abby (Kirsten Prout).
The brooding dad is Mark Miller (Goran Visnjic), his name is a nod to
the writer/ artist who invented the character of Elektra, Frank
Miller. (Don't know how happy Frank is about that, considering how the
movie turned out) Since Mark is a guy and Elektra's a girl, they
inevitably share a completely out-out-place and pointless romance
subplot. This is valuable screen time that could have been used for
more close-ups of Jennifer Garner's tight jeans, dangnabit.
The character of Elektra is all over the place. There is a mention
that she has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and it simply goes nowhere,
unless having her counting steps makes her OCD. Her "superpowers", or
whatever, are ill defined and murky. Is she actually seeing into the
future or is she just watching while the editor fast forwards the
movie? At one point she can apparently communicate telepathically
with the bad guys (something she showed no indication for previously)
for no other reason than to get another fight going.
Elektra also has the superpower of super-speed; this is shown by
cutting away to a different angle and she's instantly standing there.
The 2002 Mr. Deeds remake with John Tuttoro as the sneaky butler used
the same trick. The cutaways were intended to be funny in Mr. Deeds,
but in Elektra it comes off as really stupid.
Garner doesn't elevate this schizophrenically written part in any way,
she alternates between sad or blank faced. For a cold-blooded killer,
she's actually just a big softie underneath it all with gooey motherly
instincts for the 13 year old girl she swears to protect. Usually,
I'm a sucker for deadly assassin/ cute kid combos. Leon: The
Professional and Terminator 2: Judgment Day are two of my personal
favourites. But those films had interesting protagonist leads;
Elektra herself is just dull and Garner's boring performance doesn't
help.
The bad guys who hunt Elektra down look nifty but this is entirely
because of the FX work. One particularly imaginative baddie is able
to make the tattoos on his body grow outward to stalk his victims.
There's also Typhoid Mary, a woman with a literal kiss of death who
can wilt flowers by just walking by them, and it creates a real
crackerjack visual image.
However, these bad guys don't have any characterization, or even much
dialogue. They look menacing but take away the CGI trickery and
they're pretty lame. Even weaker is how they're established as being
so badass and then disposed of in cheap and quick ways. One bad guy
has an introductory scene that establishes him as impervious to a
shotgun at point blank range and then he's easily dispensed of two
minutes later. I call shenanigans on that.
Rob Bowman, who helmed some of the moodier X-Files episodes, directs
Elektra. He seems unable to shake the X-Files style, because in almost
every scene in Elektra is encased in shadow, and not in a good way.
You can barely see what's happening on screen because it's so
dangblasted dark all the time. There's using light and shadow to
establish mood, and then there's just bad lighting. Elektra falls
into the later category.
In this humble critic's opinion, if you want to see good killer and
kid movies, go look for the extended cuts of The Professional or
Terminator 2. If you want to experience classic Frank Miller stories,
grab a copy of Dark Knight Returns from your local comic book store or
wait for the Sin City adaptation later this year. If you want to see
some nifty FX work, watch Elektra. Only the last 30 minutes. On TV.
For free.
Anyway, they should be able to synthesize H2O from the hydrogen and oxygen, being as they have faster than light travel and all...then again, I would have thought they'd have evolved beyond suit and ties so what do I know?
You know, something just dawned on me and I don't know why I've never considered it before. Considering the tremendous distances that any space travel will entail, it seems much more likely that our first contact with intelligent life will actually be artifical in nature. so we're more likely to see a Cylon than a human. I mean, think about what NASA just did this past week and landed a space craft on a moon of Saturn, and the Rover on Mars. So those UFOs we're always spotting may actually be unmanned.
A Sandman movie... only if David Bowie plays Morpheus.
Holy crap Ed, I had the EXACT SAME THOUGHT this weekend, brought on by an article I can't find now where some legit scientists said that we should take UFO reports a bit more seriously since, given the age of the universe, there is no logical reason that alins don't exist and we haven't seen them yet.
Now if the speed of light does turn out to be an unbeatable limitation that would explain their lack of physical presence but give a few thousand years of technological advancement it should be child's play to come up with a design for unmanned ships that both explore the universe and make duplicates of themselves. The universe should be swarming with the damn things (Not a bad premise for a movie--a horde of automated UFOs, having chewed up every available molecule in their own galaxy, are heading for ours. A great opportunity for large scale guilt free destruction--our only hope would be to design remote controlled UFO blasters and have them hooked up to gameboy controllers, allowing the Youth of Today to mindlessly blast the alien menace to oblivian during their ample leisure time).
Worst Movie ....
Mixed Nuts with Steve Martin, Robot Jox maybe a close second.
Worst superhero movie, I think the 4th superhero movie in a series is the worst ie Superman IV, good thing Batman never made it to a 4th movie :-)
Catwoman was rumored to be bad, and how can you make Halle Berry unatractive to look at?
I like Afflek playing Affleck ... DD the movie was bad cause the movie was bad, not Mr Ben.
And Bill, your DVD viewing habits made me laugh really hard.
The universe should be swarming with the damn things (Not a bad premise for a movie--a horde of automated UFOs, having chewed up every available molecule in their own galaxy, are heading for ours. A great opportunity for large scale guilt free destruction--
Actually now that I think about it, Justice League Unlimited dealt with just such a story two weeks ago.
As far as "Worst Movie Ever!"s go, try to find a copy of a 1974 movie called "They", aka "Invasion from Inner Earth."
A friend and I rented it with the sole intention of doing an MST3K job on it... it was untouchable. It was so thoroughly bad, we couldn't even make fun of it. We could only watch in horror, praying it would end soon. I'm a big fan of schlock cinema (to the point where I actually enjoyed both "Battle Beyond The Stars" AND "The Green Slime"), but "They" takes the cake. Hell, it takes the whole kitchen.
Not a bad premise for a movie--a horde of automated UFOs, having chewed up every available molecule in their own galaxy, are heading for ours. A great opportunity for large scale guilt free destruction--our only hope would be to design remote controlled UFO blasters and have them hooked up to gameboy controllers, allowing the Youth of Today to mindlessly blast the alien menace to oblivian during their ample leisure time).
What, you didn't see Independence Day or Mars Attacks!? :)
BrakYeller says:
"As far as "Worst Movie Ever!"s go, try to find a copy of a 1974 movie called "They", aka "Invasion from Inner Earth."
Wow, thanks for the tip. I had to look this one up and discovered that it is just one of the films from a guy named Bill Rebane, whose oeuvre includes Blood Harvest, Twister's Revenge, The Demons of Ludlow, The Capture of Bigfoot, The Alpha Incident, Rana: The Legend of Shadow Lake, The Giant Spider Invasion, and (omigod!) Monster a-Go Go! Holy crap!
Bill-
Just when I think you couldn't get any cooler, you go and bring up Bill Rebane. We're going to have to trade schlock horror stories some time, because anyone familiar with Rebane's work has GOT to have some good ones.
-tOjb
Anytime, my friend. My wife would probably appreciate it if I had someone else to bounce things off of instead of just her (although I think she secretly enjoys it when, 10 minutes into Shriek of the Mutilated or The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra she can turn to me and say "weel, you've done it again.")
I can't believe you've done a 'worst movie' list and nobody mentioned 'Wild wild West' with Will Smith and Kevin Kline.
Makes Batman and Robin look like Shakespear. Lord, that's a painful movie!
And comic movies: how about that wretched Captain America movie?
I'll probably see Elektra on video, but want to see FF in the theatre.
I can't believe you've done a 'worst movie' list and nobody mentioned 'Wild wild West' with Will Smith and Kevin Kline.
Makes Batman and Robin look like Shakespear. Lord, that's a painful movie!
And comic movies: how about that wretched Captain America movie?
I'll probably see Elektra on video, but want to see FF in the theatre.
(Delayed response, because the film has only just started showing in the UK.)
I went to see this film a few days ago, and I liked it. In fact, I've found that there are a few things which make more sense now that I've had a chance to think about them, which suggests that it's not just superficial. Well, either that, or that I'm just slow on the uptake.
For instance, TallestFanEver said: "There is a mention that she has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and it simply goes nowhere". Although it wasn't followed up on, it does actually explain some scenes from earlier in the film, or rather it shows them in a different light. Specifically, we saw her doing obsessive cleaning (scrubbing the floor), as well as moving her toothpaste etc. around until they were exactly lined up. This also shows why she's bad at waiting around, which in turn probably made her more likely to accept the dinner invitation.
On a similar note, there's a scene where Elektra is standing outside, and then realises that the daughter is standing nearby. When I heard the "How long have you been standing there?" "About a minute" exchange, I figured that the point was for Elektra to think "Wow, I'm slipping, I should have noticed her before that". But in fact that was foreshadowing, which makes more sense in hindsight when you know that the daughter also has martial arts training.
My main reservation about "Daredevil" was that they'd gone overboard on the superpowers, but the mystic aspects in this film didn't bother me - less detached than "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon", but more grounded than "Bulletproof Monk" (which was a fun film). Probably the best compliment I can give is that I hadn't finished my drink by the end of the film, because there were hardly any points when I'd feel comfortable making a noise. I really should get round to watching "Alias" sometime, to see more of Jennifer Garner's work...
As far as guys liking lesbian scenes one explaination I've heard for it is that with a lesbian scene you get to look at two hot women, and you don't have to look at another guy.
I saw Elektra Thursday and it wasn't the disaster some of the talk made it out to be, but it was pretty lifeless.
If you need a bad film fix try and find a copy of Starship Invasions. This was one of those films from the era when the Canadian government would give you money to make a film as long it was made in Canada, no matter how bad it was. The final space battle in it looks like a bunch of bouncing pingpong balls covered with aluminum foil. And there's the added bonus of both Robert Vaughn and Christopher Lee being the stars.